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Is he being rude?


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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:21 PM   #61
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Originally Posted by Versacehottie View Post
Sorry i had to agree. I'm rooting for the OP but this is a lot of suspicion about a simple (even if it's misguided) statement. Maybe the humor is not on the same page. I think it's funny and appreciate that he is showing or trying to show some wit about the irony of the situation. I don't know how a fawning message back being overly complimentary about her career path would be much better. I don't see it as negging (although it could be possibly). I see it as someone who is trying to show personality and not be boring. Lol, if he even knew this much discussion was going on about a simple statement he may figure that OP and him just aren't well suited humor wise. Idk, i see it as light-hearted and in line with first messages people are trading back and forth. My advice would also be to lighten up, lower the stakes. You're a smart girl and surely will notice if someone is giving you run-around and put downs and can walk away from it at any time when you are sure. This is so much speculation when there is not enough evidence one way or another. So glad you are open to going on a date with him.

Come on guys, so much hate on good looking people. Really?
how can you not see it this way!!

seems like he might have too much game
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:21 PM   #62
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Originally Posted by Lorenza View Post
Now for the sake of fairness, this is twisting this guy's words. When you put it like that, it sounds terrible, but that's not what he said, was it? No need to rush to demonize him. Maybe he'll end up being a jerk, but how on Earth would we know from such a little piece of info?
I already said she needs to lob a few grenades back
and if he gets uppity he is a jerk and if he responds to the "game" she should go for coffee/drink.
I posted that newer comment in response to the allegation that the OP has no sense of humour, but as he actually didn't say anything remotely funny it is hardly a surprise she is not laughing.
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:25 PM   #63
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I already said she needs to lob a few grenades back
and if he gets uppity he is a jerk and if he responds to the "game" she should go for coffee/drink.
I posted that newer comment in response to the allegation that the OP has no sense of humour, but as he actually didn't say anything remotely funny it is hardly a surprise she is not laughing.
This is the point of what he said. It can be interpreted in multiple ways. how she responds will let him know what he is dealing with

Its so simple and challenging. He wants a response so he can decide which way to go
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:35 PM   #64
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I do think he sailed close to the wind though.
Most people do not respond well to strangers who want to take apart or deride their choice of career, especially if it is career that is important or requires years of work/study or is a vocation or is a business they are proud of.
It often comes across as petty and jealous, and is usually not appreciated as it cuts deep into who they are as a person.
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:40 PM   #65
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Originally Posted by Lorenza View Post
A lot of assumption going on here... I agree his comments were somewhat annoying, but it's way too soon to tell what kind of person he really is. Also, it's unfair to assume a guy is an ahole just because he's good looking. Not all good looking people take themselves for gods who can treat everyone as they seem fit.
Assumption? He painted his own picture. OP stated as such. She's not liking his vibe, hence this thread.

So someone who is good looking gets a pass to treat others badly? Oh right, I forgot.

Last edited by Chris2016; 2nd January 2018 at 7:49 PM..
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:51 PM   #66
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forget hes good looking.

Ill go out on a limb.... OP respond to him, exactly how you feel you should...ill bet crickets

See, we are only discussing the OP point of view because that's what we have.

I find it interesting that the post had enough wheels to discuss but none the less, I learned something. Maybe I learned I am an ass
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:54 PM   #67
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Assumption? He painted his own picture. OP stated as such. She's also not liking his vibe, hence this thread.

So someone who is good looking gets a pass to treat others badly? Oh right, I forgot.
on that logic, it's the OP who is giving him a pass perhaps because he is good looking. If it was clear cut rude then hopefully she would be clear cut not interested and we would have no need for this thread. It seems like the reason and tone (prob bc it's conveyed over message and they don't know each other) is vague enough to have resulted in this thread where she is not sure what he meant exactly. Idk going to give the OP enough credit that if she knew conclusively that he was being rude, she'd would pass on dating him, regardless of his looks.

I have heard guys that look all sorts of ways say dumb and yes even rude things. Doesn't necessarily correlate to their looks. If anything, usually less good looking ones who have a chip on their shoulder about that specifically.

Anyway it seems as if the whole good looking comment has generated more paranoia about his intentions. Same as other issue--she doesn't have enough info about his intentions and shouldn't correlate it to his looks. Well unless she believes that he is truly out of her league--and then why would she be interested in dating him. Idk, i don't think paranoid and suspicious thoughts are going to serve anyone on OLD. How would you ever get past go?
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:58 PM   #68
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She could respond. Then he would, then she would, then he would... then, by the grace of a higher power, they set a date.

She needs to respond as much of a reason as he sent the text, to clarify what the friggin guy means.

this is how we find chemistry, through our moral compass, needs, intellect and understanding
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Old 2nd January 2018, 7:58 PM   #69
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Originally Posted by Lorenza View Post
A lot of assumption going on here... I agree his comments were somewhat annoying, but it's way too soon to tell what kind of person he really is. Also, it's unfair to assume a guy is an ahole just because he's good looking. Not all good looking people take themselves for gods who can treat everyone as they seem fit.
It's also silly to assume a guy is worth time and effort because he's good looking.
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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:02 PM   #70
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I'm quite sure I have put more time, effort and thinking into this guy than OP has and will...

Time and effort! Text the guy back for crying out loud and tell what he says...better yet, send his info to me and I will
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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:08 PM   #71
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Originally Posted by staggerlee71 View Post
She could respond. Then he would, then she would, then he would... then, by the grace of a higher power, they set a date.

She needs to respond as much of a reason as he sent the text, to clarify what the friggin guy means.

this is how we find chemistry, through our moral compass, needs, intellect and understanding
I do have a sense of humour, I can hold my own in the banter stakes. Just didnít expect the tone of the conversation to start off with so much dry wit - if thatís what it is.
I responded quite wittily back then with a question about what he does. Keeping it open ended to feel it out more.
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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:10 PM   #72
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Atta Girl!! show him what you got
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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:10 PM   #73
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Itís amazing how things get so blown out of proportion!

Itís all in fun folks. Pouty faces, a possible omen that she is a family attorney? Seems funny to me.

If I would have gotten those comments, I would have thought, great, someone with some personality and humor! It would be fun to play along.

Time to lighten up!
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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:11 PM   #74
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Originally Posted by elaine567 View Post
I do think he sailed close to the wind though.
Most people do not respond well to strangers who want to take apart or deride their choice of career, especially if it is career that is important or requires years of work/study or is a vocation or is a business they are proud of.
It often comes across as petty and jealous, and is usually not appreciated as it cuts deep into who they are as a person.
This. Now thatís IF he was deliberately being rude, then I agree 100%. I guess by testing the waters Iíll be able to ascertain if this is the case. Iíll give him the benefit of the doubt unless he proves otherwise over the next few days.
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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:17 PM   #75
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Originally Posted by basil67 View Post
No woman with an ounce of self worth finds it attractive. It's a technique used by guys who have poor social skills to find desperate girls.

You mention that you're pursuing this because he's good looking. That's only skin deep. What makes him really worth pursing?
Despite not jumping for joy initially when I read his first couple of messages, I still wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt (because thereís also a 50% chance heís joking or using techniques to stand out from the crowd) given I am so bad at reading signals myself. I donít know him well enough to be able to conclusively tell you what makes it worth pursuing, but all I can do is give it more time to be able to determine if he wants to hold genuine conversation or not. No love lost either way.
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