Jump to content

an OLD thing , what the , what is this ?


Chilli

Recommended Posts

Just shoot me but l rejoined my old date site from a few yrs back the other day .

Wasn't really fussed just thought l'd look around.

This lady gave me a like, seemed quite nice so l liked her back and we chatted.

 

Next day she had a good morng waiting for me, chatted a bit more. That night she started disappearing but she was still on. Sent her a message or two, went back few hrs later, no replies. Next morning just some 3 word reply.

l thought stuff this and removed her from contacts. On mine that's it when you do that it's goodnight.

So next morning she re'liked me again,l thought oh, we must be ok then so l liked her back and we started talking again. Said sorry about that but l didn't think you were interested she says oh hell yeah something just came up.

 

Gave her my number, she said great l'll get back to you later, sends me a text through the day, l replied later, nothing.

Two days ago. WTH is that ?

l mean to re'like me again was a pretty gutsy move , yet disappearo, again !

l'm not fussed she was pretty boring anyway but what the hell ?

Edited by Chilli
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

There are so many time wasters on OLD, I don't even bat an eyelash anymore when they pull this crap. Nearly 50% of the women who express genuine interest flake or ghost these days. That's just the way it is. Could be many reasons:

 

- She's a catfish

- She's married

- She just wants an ego boost and never intended to meet

- Or most likely, she's playing the field and keeping you lukewarm until better options came along. The repeated ghosting and liking means someone better DID come along (for all of a minute) but then probably ghosted her. What goes around, comes around...

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

You can't expect somebody you connected with through OLD to be at your beck & call.

 

She does sound flaky so I wouldn't put much faith in her.

 

Try talking to others & not worry so much about her.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Ahh, not worried about her like l said she was pretty boring but what is this crap, yaknow.

Been a long time , gonna have to get use to all the garbage again l guess.

 

l'm actually looking for someone from last time tbh, hoping she might still be around. :cool:

Link to post
Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle

"Time wasters" - indeed. They seem to run a muck online regardless of gender.

 

I've been here and what I've learned is to believe them the first time around.

 

I think it's irrelevant why someone behaves this way and to try and figure it out would be just a big of a time waster. Whatever the reason, if it annoys you, if it offends you, that's all you need to know and be done with those people.

 

Online is fickle at the best of times so it behooves you to not bother with second chances in an arena where options are in abundance and attentions spans are in short supply.

 

Lesson learned. Swipe right on someone else and forget this chick.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic
Ahh, not worried about her like l said she was pretty boring but what is this crap, yaknow.

Been a long time , gonna have to get use to all the garbage again l guess.

 

l'm actually looking for someone from last time tbh, hoping she might still be around. :cool:

 

Yep, this!

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Oh brother , shoulda left her un'liked.knew it.

 

Nothing from her a few days, didn't even bother answering my last reply, come in today here's a gooooddd morningggg, how are ya.

Phone was inside, message was a few hours old.

 

ls there some point l'm missing here, damn bs.

 

Wonder if there's a personality thing goin on with people like this. She's 44, never married no kids , said she'd love to get married but has only had some short relationships.

Might help if she actually talked now and then. ya think !!

Edited by Chilli
Link to post
Share on other sites

What about ask her out? If she flakes out on that, you can write her and tell her it isn't going to work and remove her from your list. Granted, she seems a bit flaky, maybe playing hard to get, but maybe she doesn't like texting, or she's been trapped by the perpetual texter (I've had a few) and just doesn't extend much into it anymore. You don't know if she's boring until you meet her. That seems like a reasonable first step over counting the minutes and hours between her texting. If she can't carry a conversation in person, that's the important thing, and at least you'll know.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I have actually never met a woman in person through an online dating site, though my experience in online dating is almost nil. The reason I gave up is similar to your experience here. It was just a frustrating game of here today, gone tomorrow, back again. Everyone appeared flaky, but it's probably because the women were juggling multiple men. It wasn't for me, though I am sure if I would have put forth the effort something could have panned out. I just don't have the patience for all the typing, etc. I like in person better.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Everyone has access to scores, hundreds of possibilities. It is no surprise that people behave a little or more flakey. I too have potentials and try to set up dates, but I am careful that they ALL meet the minimum characteristics that any OLD profile provides. Once there is a connection with any one of them, I try to concentrate on that person...until the next person. To be honest, when people realize that they are not the only option out there, the less frustrating OLD becomes. Unfortunate, but that's the way it is.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

yeah, weird.

She is a slow flame, l do like that ,pretty too, says she wants to email first and get to know someone before we meet, sounds very cautious,

l get that.

But she would've tapped away on the site for another wk if l didn't nudge it, hate the site emailing stuff and gave her my number. She text me straight away.

She had a really nice page we sounded a lot a like , deep thinker,too and l do love that,all why l bothered, but l really hate squeezing convo and that's when she started feeling boring.

 

Anyway , even with the nice page, looks, and l do like her thinking, she's 2hours away so l doubt we;re gonna get far at this rate.

 

Funny , l'm sure something happens around summer time , everyone's frisky, It's coming into summer here, had a bit more of a look around the other night and found piles of women that sounded very nice, emailed some, l can just see date site overload approaching by next week , oh noooo.

Think l'll just spend summer at the beach instead haha.

Edited by Chilli
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Cut the cord with that one , l mean next day replies, don't mind slow but that's ridiculous.

 

Now suffering overload , hasn't even been a week yet.

l dunno who the hell anyone is l'm talking to. Think l may've gotten carried away with some likes.

Don't think l'm cut out for this..

Edited by Chilli
Link to post
Share on other sites

l dunno who the hell anyone is l'm talking to. Think l may've gotten carried away with some likes.

Don't think l'm cut out for this..

 

Welcome to the wonderful world of OLD. You'll get used to this sort of behavior :lmao:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Trouble is in early dating everyone is on the look out for deal breakers, so that they do not waste any time.

Whilst yes, there will be flaky people around, I guess some in the course of the text exchanges or calls find out something that to them is a no go.

It may be a fundamental incompatibility (I am not going to date an ex prisoner, drug addict, person with enough baggage to ground an aircraft, Hillary/Trump supporter... etc.)

or it may just be a gut feeling (he/she sounds a bit like my ex now I think of it, or I did not really like that tone and it was not a "joke" I found funny or I am already getting a bit bored, upset, annoyed...)

 

They go from being all gungho, to stepping back and disappearing.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I think people expect way too much from online interactions. Just because someone 'liked' you and exchanged a couple of messages doesn't mean a whole lot, and it sure doesn't mean that you should expect them to be responsive all the time.

 

Sure, she's flaky, but she's not in any way invested in you. You are just a stranger. She is probably talking to 10 others. Maybe she gets bored with messaging and reads a book or watches TV.

 

That's just the nature of old. Until you have met, don't get invested in any conversations, don't expect anything.

And don't waste much time on it all either. A couple of messages, ask her out.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

l can't believe it , l've actually found some what seems like very special girls on there this time.

Discovered a new way to search.

 

l know expect the worst and yep l don't expect much but l'm secretly actually a tiny bit exited about these new girls.

 

Dunno why , l know l'm not meeting my love on a date site anyway, so l've been told, but hey, it keeps me occupied while l'm waiting , right.

And you never do know.anything can happen.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
l can't believe it , l've actually found some what seems like very special girls on there this time.

Discovered a new way to search.

 

l know expect the worst and yep l don't expect much but l'm secretly actually a tiny bit exited about these new girls.

 

Dunno why , l know l'm not meeting my love on a date site anyway, so l've been told, but hey, it keeps me occupied while l'm waiting , right.

And you never do know.anything can happen.

 

Chilli, I like your excitement in this post. I hope you find a woman who matches your excitement.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Hey pop, thanks for that..

 

Yeah it's been a really nice surprise. Quite tricky to search really isn't it , mines got all these things to turn on or off and if something not right you get jack., change one thing, bingo.

 

l've found someone l really , really, wanna meet. But there's a problem and l'm wondering if someone has l trick or idea. ?

 

You see l can't like her, because she has an age limit thing on her page and it's WT, one year short or me, so l can't email her.

life is cruel , l'm telling you.

 

So , l sat on her page for awhile while she was on line, it will show on her notice thing l'm there, trying to send her through a vibe, pleassseee ,put your age thing up 1 yr , just one, one little year.

let ya know if she heard me.

Option two , she gets curious, reads my page , and puts her thing up one year , well ya never know. !!!!!!!

Edited by Chilli
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Damn , she must be talking to someone , she won't look at my page damn it.

 

My telepathy must be running stone cold tonight. :lmao::lmao::lmao:

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

She still hasn't found my page , damn.

 

Talkin to this really cute , extreme cuteness in fact, Chinese Australian chick right now, she's 3hours away though , wants me to come see her, suchhh a little hottie , might just go. We'll talk a bit more first though. She's funny , has me cracking up.

 

But l still want the other one to find my damn page and put her search thing up just that one more year. Damn.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Hey pop, thanks for that..

 

Yeah it's been a really nice surprise. Quite tricky to search really isn't it , mines got all these things to turn on or off and if something not right you get jack., change one thing, bingo.

 

l've found someone l really , really, wanna meet. But there's a problem and l'm wondering if someone has l trick or idea. ?

 

You see l can't like her, because she has an age limit thing on her page and it's WT, one year short or me, so l can't email her.

life is cruel , l'm telling you.

 

So , l sat on her page for awhile while she was on line, it will show on her notice thing l'm there, trying to send her through a vibe, pleassseee ,put your age thing up 1 yr , just one, one little year.

let ya know if she heard me.

Option two , she gets curious, reads my page , and puts her thing up one year , well ya never know. !!!!!!!

 

She probably forgot what she set. Honestly, when you set these things it's easy to just set it and forget it. And I know I don't even look at guys who are just browsing by my profile. I figure if they are really interested they would write. If I were you, I'd change my age by the one year just to write to her (and tell her you did). I don't condone lying, but if she likes you enough, she won't care that you did that to get access to write her. Key phrase: if she's interested enough. If she gets all pissy, then she's not interested enough and that's life. Change your age back and move on.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Ahh right , must be it , l'm starting to feel like a stalker but she still hasn't checked out my page.

Brilliant pop , damn, l'll try that and email her.

 

 

Yeah l see what you mean about the searching thing or whatever boxes you tick. Funny , l had all these guys asking me out the first time and l'm thinking wth, didn't know how to work it properly. Found out few days later l'd ticked looking for guys and girls. oops..

Link to post
Share on other sites
Cookiesandough
l can't believe it , l've actually found some what seems like very special girls on there this time.

Discovered a new way to search.

 

l know expect the worst and yep l don't expect much but l'm secretly actually a tiny bit exited about these new girls.

 

Dunno why , l know l'm not meeting my love on a date site anyway, so l've been told, but hey, it keeps me occupied while l'm waiting , right.

And you never do know.anything can happen.

 

That's the spirit ?

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...