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Continued mixed signals...


CryForNoOne

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I hung out last night with this waitress, let's call her Caitlin, I used to have a crush on. We've become good friends but there has always this sexual tension and cloud of uncertainty (at least for me but perhaps both of us).

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/632159-playing-fire

 

I'm often Caitlin's teammate for trivia night at her work on Wednesday nights. We continue to hang after she clocks out at 10PM. Last night we hung out the whole night until 2:30AM - almost 7 hours! Neither of us seemed to have any interest in stopping and we completely lost track of time. We both make each other laugh hysterically.

 

A girl I just started seeing texted me about 8PM. I told her I was at the bar and invited her to join me to which she replied "OK". Caitlin met her last week and approved - giving her the big thumbs up. Anyway, she never showed up. At 10:30PM she texted me "good night", which Caitlin saw as I read. She jokingly remarked "She probably came here and saw us together and assumed we were f**king so went home." What to make of that???

 

Things continued to get more convoluted. We were also chatting with our bartender, let's call her Ashley, who is also very attractive and just started working there. I mentioned I was in a band and Ashley asked when our next gig was. I told her we're shooting a promo video on Monday for an upcoming tour but I could invite a few groupies (jk). She added me on IG and gave me her number so I would invite her. She also asked Caitlin for her number (they don't know each other well yet) and asked her to join. So now both are coming to my video shoot on Monday. So Ashley seems interested in me but recruited Caitlin to tag along.

 

Now another really odd thing is that about a month ago Caitlin had confided with me about a vaginal bacteria infection that she is struggling with. She stopped drinking and altered her diet to try to get rid of it. Last night I jokingly commented that she must be over it as she was drinking a lot, but she told me no - she just gave up any homeopathic remedy for the moment. Just the fact that we talk about her feminine hygiene confuses me thoroughly. Am I in the ultimate friend-zone or is this some bizarre form of pre-sex intimacy??? I'm not even sure who has friend-zoned whom at this point...

 

When I dropped Caitlin off she asked me to park and we talked for another 30 minutes in front of her place. Her roommate was out of town. Was she just lonely and wanted someone to talk to? She didn't invite me up and I didn't dare make a move. We have a great friendship and I'm afraid to ruin it. She is the only female friend I have that is completely drama free. The minute I cross that line, I'm terrified I'm going to ruin that forever. She also supposedly has a boyfriend though they've been in breakup limbo for months now. So I just let her talk until she finally went upstairs.

 

I've been trying to play it cool with Caitlin so I don't text her after we hang out - other than to let her know I made it home safely. She always texts me first the next day thanking me for the ride home and for my "friendship". I did text Ashley today, inviting her to Monday's shoot to which she replied "Yes!!!! I've been practicing my moves!" (I joked we needed fly girls for the video). I haven't invited Caitlin yet.

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Cookiesandough

I don't think anyone sane talks about their vag infection to someone they're sexually interested in. I'm sorry!!!

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Ashey sounds promising for you I get a good vibe from what you just said. I don't get any other vibe from Caitlin is just your buddy. She had another guy but broke off a few months ago. You see she tells you things your like her "b" or friend in this case. So you can have a girl as a friend no as the boy friend and girl friend. Go after Ashey. The other one as V Infection did she say yeast infection then she would have to control her diet and drink more water.

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I don't think anyone sane talks about their vag infection to someone they're sexually interested in. I'm sorry!!!

 

Your right I agree, this woman thinks of him as her buddy.. That's it.. It's better off with Ashey if she said "YES!!!!

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I don't think anyone sane talks about their vag infection to someone they're sexually interested in. I'm sorry!!!

 

Who talks to anyone about their vag infection except their mom, a close girlfriend, or gynecologist??? None of my exes have ever given me the level of detail she has, including one I lived with for 12 years!

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Cookiesandough
Who talks to anyone about their vag infection except their mom, a close girlfriend, or gynecologist??? None of my exes have ever given me the level of detail she has, including one I lived with for 12 years!

 

hahaha yea it's interesting. I remember talking about my menstrual cycle with crushes before I knew how appalling that was, but this is something else. I'm surprised it didn't put you off xD I agree with Al

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hahaha yea it's interesting. I remember talking about my menstrual cycle with crushes before I knew how appalling that was, but this is something else. I'm surprised it didn't put you off xD I agree with Al

 

She gets away with murder because she's so pretty. For instance, also on Wednesday I insisted she take a breath mint because she reeked of garlic pretty bad. She couldn't believe I was the first person to tell her. But then proceeded to intentionally blow her garlic/mint breath in my face the rest of the night. Definitely if she wasn't so attractive, these things would be really off putting. But then last night she texted me and Ashley a pic of her lunch with more garlic (must be part of her bacteria cleansing diet) with the caption "Who's bringing breath mints tonight :p"

 

I think I'm going to leave it alone for now and continue pursuing may other options. I'm really content with our friendship as she is consistent and reliable female company with zero drama. She's always there for me when I'm feeling slightly lonely. I think she views me as a friend but I would not be surprised if she's harboring secret feelings. I'm definitely not sure how I feel. It's been ages now, but when I was 22 I had a very similar dynamic with a girl I would up dating for 4.5 years. We knew each other for about a year before dating and the playful flirting gradually progressed. When we finally went on our first date, we were already in love, and she moved in the very next day...

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