funraiser Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 Ok... lets see if you can help me with this... I am on my early 20's and I study and work in my family business. I am self confident and usually I know what I want.... usually.... I have been dating for the last 3 months a wonderful girl (we are not exclusive). While exclusivity has not been established I don't think she is dating anyone else and I wasn't either until this week. At work I work quite often with a woman (late 20's/early 30's) and I think I have always had a crush on her (she works very long for our firm and I have known her since I was 14). I never thought that she would have any kind of interest on me but after a company outing this week we ended up in her house and we had sex. It was explosive, the best experience I had in my life and since that day we haven't stopped having sex every day. Well tomorrow I am going to see the girl I have been dating and I am totally confused... I really thought I loved her... and somehow (in a sick way) I still think I do, but I can't stop thinking about the woman at work too... I really don't know what to do... My friends think that the woman who works with me is just having some fun with me but that she will move on and that I should just move on with the girl from the University... I am totally confused...Do you guys think that a woman in the late 20's/early 30's (I don't know exactly her age) could really be romantically interested in a 20 years old guy? If I decide to move on with the girl I was previously dating, should I tell her that I had been with someone else? Please bear in mind that we are not exclusive yet ... and while I don't think so she may be having her fun from her end too... Help please! Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 Have you had sex with university girl? Link to post Share on other sites
Author funraiser Posted June 30, 2017 Author Share Posted June 30, 2017 Have you had sex with university girl? Yes I have Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 Yes I have I think you should tell her and let her decide how she feels about that. I mean, you aren't exclusive (according to you) so if she no longer wants to see you because of that, it shouldn't be that big of a deal, right? What it comes down to is deciding what/who YOU want. Don't be dishonest with her just because you don't want to be alone in case older woman isn't into it, if older woman is who you truly desire. Nobody wants to be Plan B, and you're still plenty young to find the perfect match. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 part of the conflicted feelings that are bugging you are because you really do want to be honest.....and honestly ...that is the best you can do by the university girl......as cautious said above...she needs an opportunity to make a decision.....whether she wants to still date you...... havign sex so early with your older co worker doesnt bode well for anything serious there's a risk there.if she was serious personally....she wouldnt have had sex with you on a first time outside of an established relationship...........but that is what happens when you have sex...the risk you take.....and when sex comes in...is where it starts to get muddy and confusing.....unless there was a serious intent and talk before sex was involved.....i hope you come clean with the uni girl....and i wish you well....deb Link to post Share on other sites
Maggie4 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 You said you think you love her but you're not exclusive. To me, that just does not compute. But then, you are early 20's, sowing your wild oats. I really think you are not ready for a serious relationship. No problem, just be honest and use protection. You can be having sex with both women, if they both agree. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 An additional note: You are only 20. MANY of us are old enough to be your parents or grandparents. So take our advice.....if you decide NOW, at just the beginning of your adult life, that you are going to live with honesty and integrity, it's going to take you very, very far and you will never regret that decision. If you don't live that way? Well, you will have regrets. OK, off my mommy soap box . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 If I decide to move on with the girl I was previously dating, should I tell her that I had been with someone else? Please bear in mind that we are not exclusive yet ... and while I don't think so she may be having her fun from her end too...I'm going to advise against volunteering any information to either woman, for now. You're not exclusive with either of them, so you're not doing anything wrong. If either of them asks directly, you should answer honestly, of course. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Maggie4 Posted July 1, 2017 Share Posted July 1, 2017 I'm going to advise against volunteering any information to either woman, for now. You're not exclusive with either of them, so you're not doing anything wrong. If either of them asks directly, you should answer honestly, of course. But that's omission. Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted July 1, 2017 Share Posted July 1, 2017 But that's omission.Most people don't reveal every detail of their life during early dating. All of those unrevealed details would fall under omission. I've never had a woman tell me she was sleeping with someone else while dating me. It's none of my business until we're exclusive. Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted July 1, 2017 Share Posted July 1, 2017 funraiser, Are you using protection? The last thing you want is either getting an STD or getting either of them getting pregnant. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author funraiser Posted July 1, 2017 Author Share Posted July 1, 2017 I'm going to advise against volunteering any information to either woman, for now. You're not exclusive with either of them, so you're not doing anything wrong. If either of them asks directly, you should answer honestly, of course. Yes, I agree. I talked today with the university girl and while I didn't told her anything about the other woman I made a joke remark about not wanting to know the amount of guys she is seeing since we are not exclusive and she is so hot... and it landed well. I don't really know if she is actually seeing anyone else and at this moment I don't really care. I enjoy the time I expend with her and I enjoy the time I expend with the other woman too and for now I just will keep it this way. As someone else said in the thread I am too young to really start thinking about relationships. funraiser, Are you using protection? The last thing you want is either getting an STD or getting either of them getting pregnant. I always use protection. I wouldn't want it any other way. Link to post Share on other sites
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