palmsand Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 Went on an amazing second date yesterday. We were originally just getting lunch but her work called and she didn't have to go in later so we drove to the beach and walked for hours, kissed in the tidal pools, etc. She said that she had talked too much the first date (which I reassured her she did not), and said this time she would ask me questions. Pretty soon the questions were about how many people I've kissed, slept with, etc. I asked her the same thing. Very few for both of us. I have read that the defining start of a relationship is when two people decide to be exclusive. From what we said yesterday, that is definitely the case. Was that basically the talk? She also deleted the dating app, as did I. We talked about literally everything. Everything awkward, embarrassing, sad, that has ever happened to us. Everything I was scared to tell her for fear of her thinking it was weird or a show-stopper was perfectly ok. Seeing her again today. I know it sounds crazy given we've only known each other less than two weeks, but does this sound serious? Link to post Share on other sites
Tressugar Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 Too soon for all of that. What's the rush? Slow and steady wins the race. Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 slow down.. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronnys93 Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 You've only known each other less than two weeks? Hmm, it's possible that she doesn't do the whole serial dating thing. Where one person dates several people at one time. That would explain the deleting of the app. However, I wouldn't expect you to EXPECT exclusivity all that soon, you have to take things slow and actually develop an actual relationship. Deleting apps =/= exclusivity or an actual developed relationship. As the others have said above, slow it down. Link to post Share on other sites
sydneysider1978 Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 I come from the UK and multi-dating isn't that common here. I don't see exclusivity as a huge deal. If it suits both of you why not give dating others a break for a while. It's not the same as saying you're super-serious or have any commitment. You can still take it slowly even if you're not dating others. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 I come from the UK and multi-dating isn't that common here. I don't see exclusivity as a huge deal. If it suits both of you why not give dating others a break for a while. It's not the same as saying you're super-serious or have any commitment. You can still take it slowly even if you're not dating others. Ditto from me. As long as you don't confuse being exclusive with being committed to a relationship, I can't see the problem. Take your time with making promises and declarations of love is all I'd say. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 If you are happy with only dating her than wonderful ! Being exclusive isn't a marriage or a commitment, it's only agreeing to concentrate on each other. Men that were serious about me always brought up exclusivity early like on 3rd date. I also am in a relationship with a man from France and multi-dating there does not exist. If you like each other enough to kiss than you are 'together'. You can still take things slow. Exclusive does not mean starting to meet family and spending all of your time together. Enjoy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author palmsand Posted January 29, 2017 Author Share Posted January 29, 2017 Thanks for your thoughts everyone. Actually figured all this out when I saw her yesterday. I told her I deleted the dating as well, which kind of scared her at first. She saw that as me moving too fast, and said she deleted hers only because 99% of the guys she talked to were dirt bags. I told her I felt like I had to reciprocate that or I could come off as not as serious as I thought she was. So I misinterpreted that as a sign of commitment. But that's ok. We talked about everything. We both had misunderstandings of where things were and both thought the other was going too fast. We both agree that could have been a mistake and are now on the same page. So we just talked everything over and she said there are plenty of guys she could date, but doesn't want to. She just wants to see me more before getting to that point. She has really shown that she is responsible and a good communicator and really wants to see me. I really, really like this girl and I think this is a solid foundation for what may come. I am ecstatic. Link to post Share on other sites
Robert Posted January 30, 2017 Share Posted January 30, 2017 Note from moderation: if you have found your post missing from this thread, it may have been moved to our consolidated discussion of general dating topics: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/576335-general-online-other-dating-discussion-5.html#post7209813 ~6 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts