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Developing feelings for someone that it would never work with?


Kkristine

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I've developed feelings for the best friend of my friend's boyfriend. Six of us go out together, 2 couples and this guy and myself. I think the both of us just kind of take that role of a couple when we go out because we look out for each other, dance together, etc.

 

I'm pretty sure he doesn't have those kinds of feelings for me because he enjoys living the single life, and he's never initiated anything with me. We've never been alone together though.

 

I just got out of a long-term relationship, so I'm very afraid to get hurt.

 

We've all hung out several times, but last night feelings came about. It feels good, but I know it would never get to that.

 

I don't even really want it to because I want to settle down, and he doesn't even want kids anytime soon. But, I haven't felt like this in a long time.

 

I need to get over myself and stop thinking about him, I think I'm just enjoying the attention after a toxic relationship.

 

What should I do? Continue being friends and keep the "You never know" card in the back of my mind?

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Especially if your last relationship was "toxic," I think you should take plenty of time to heal from your breakup. Part of that process should include taking a hard look at what about YOU led you to stay in a toxic situation. Friends can play an important part in your healing, because they remind you of your lovability and give you a sense of belonging that make breakup lows a little less low. It would be wise to preserve this group of friends as a "safe haven" for now. You'll know when you have healed, and when that time comes, if you still have interest in this guy and think it might be reciprocal, by all means pursue it.

 

For the time being, don't.

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I've developed feelings for the best friend of my friend's boyfriend. Six of us go out together, 2 couples and this guy and myself. I think the both of us just kind of take that role of a couple when we go out because we look out for each other, dance together, etc.

 

I'm pretty sure he doesn't have those kinds of feelings for me because he enjoys living the single life, and he's never initiated anything with me. We've never been alone together though.

 

I just got out of a long-term relationship, so I'm very afraid to get hurt.

 

We've all hung out several times, but last night feelings came about. It feels good, but I know it would never get to that.

 

I don't even really want it to because I want to settle down, and he doesn't even want kids anytime soon. But, I haven't felt like this in a long time.

 

I need to get over myself and stop thinking about him, I think I'm just enjoying the attention after a toxic relationship.

 

What should I do? Continue being friends and keep the "You never know" card in the back of my mind?

 

Can you clarify what you mean?

 

How did feelings come out last night, and on whose part?

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