Girl I met off Bumble

[djcos25]

So I started using this app called Bumble. I like it much more then Tinder, I joke that it's a more "mature" version of Tinder lol. She messaged me and we started talking, we set up drinks for last Saturday. Afterwards we exchanged numbers. She is from Brazil and moved to the area last August. She is 26, I'm 30.

 

On Saturday we grabbed drinks for about 2 hours. We had a great time, we were laughing, joking around. At times when she was telling me stories she would tap my shoulder. She offered to pay for her drink but I paid.

 

When the night was over I walked her to her car. We were at a mall and they had a parking garage. She couldn't find her car, she forgot what floor she parked on. After a while she told me I could leave because she knew I had work in the morning. I stayed with her, saying that I want to make sure you get to your car safe. Plus even though she told me I could leave, I would still feel guilty. We eventually found her car and said goodbye.

 

We kept in touch and set up plans for dinner Wednesday night. We were at dinner for about 2 hours again. She asked me what my goals are, things like that. I told her eventually I'd like to have a relationship. I just got full time at my job in January so now I'm looking for a long term relationship. She noticed I was a little shy this time and asked why, I told her I was tired as it was the end of my work week. Honestly I was a bit shy this time, I was trying to come up with things to talk about. Conversation flowed though.

 

Long story short, the night ended, I paid. She kept commenting on how nice and sweet I am. I walked her to her car (she joked that at least this time she knew where she parked). We hugged, and after I held her and we looked at each other for a second or two. She leaned in a little so I leaned in and we kissed on the lips. No making out or anything, a 2-3 second kiss.

 

Later that night I texted her to make sure she got home (as I did when we got drinks as well). She texted back and said we should be friends on facebook. After telling her a little warning that I'm a bit of a nerd she asked for my name (avoiding the nerd comment lol) she added me. Then she said "Great, I had a great time with you tonight :)" After dinner and while texting her I said I'd like to see her again before she leaves. She said she might be free Friday night.

 

That's where I run into a problem. She moved here from Brazil to be part of the Au Pair Program. She lives with the family she takes care for. She told me she doesn't want to do this her whole life. She is moving for the summer, 2 months until the house in another city is being fixed. She's leaving Sunday. Yesterday I texted her good morning around 11, I didn't hear from her until 7 that night. She said she was sorry, she was busy because she's working a lot and the move coming Sunday. I told her no worries and that I was tired too (my long day, working both jobs).

 

I really would like to see her again before she leaves, I've told her after dinner and also texting that night. Both dates she asked me if I was having a good time, and after both dates asked to keep in touch. During dinner she also asked me if I was seeing anyone, which I'm not. She isn't either. Its about noon time and I haven't heard from her, how do I proceed? I know she's busy so I don't want to bug her.

[smackie9]

Let her contact you.

[angel.eyes]

She leaves in a week? Is that right? Are you planning to continue seeing her after she moves? If you aren't, I don't see the point of trying for another date in the midst of her getting ready for this move.

 

Why not focus on finding someone who will be around and available to date all summer?

[djcos25]

She leaves tomorrow (Sunday). I didn't hear from her yesterday. It wasn't like I texted her and never heard back, nobody contacted each other. She told me she thinks ignoring a text is flat out rude, I don't get that she will do that with me. I forgot to mention, during dinner she also asked me what I think of dating a different culture, to which I replied I didn't mind.

 

Ideally I'd like to keep seeing her once she comes back. She's moving a few states over for 2 months, then when she comes back it'll be one state over, but about a half hour-ish drive. I really had fun with her, I was myself. There were a few quiet parts but conversation flowed.

 

From what I typed here, I thought it was going good, no? We had potential plans Friday night, no set time or place or anything, she just told me after dinner on Wednesday she might be free. I thought it seemed strange she didn't contact me just to say she was busy. I didn't want to text her because she did say she is working a lot with the move on Sunday. Then I think to myself why did she ask to add me on Facebook.

 

A little off topic, I've had many instances, especially lately, where I get a girls number and we have potential plans, and they flake out or we have one date and that's it. It's just getting frustrating. With getting a second date with this girl and her adding me on facebook I was thinking "oh maybe things are changing." I had one instance a few weeks ago where I was talking to one girl, she asked to add me on facebook. This was before we met, I was thinking she must be really interested in me. Big mistake, now I never have a girl add me until after we meet. After she added me, I never heard from her. My Nana (Grandma) on my Mom's side passed away that week. We had plans to meet Friday, so I texted her that she passed and the wake was Friday. No response, not even a "sorry for your loss." I'm sure she knew because I put the obituary on facebook.

 

People can be so rude. This girl seems genuine which is why I'd like to keep seeing her.

[angel.eyes]

She's busy with her move. You're being unrealistic. Why would she prioritize someone she meet twice over her job and moving? Especially when you stop dating once she moves...tomorrow! You have no intention of travelling to see her this summer, so what's the point?

 

Honestly, go find someone who is around this summer to date!

[djcos25]

So wanting a text message just saying "Hey I won't have time to do anything" is being unrealistic?

 

I thought the 2 dates went well. I'd like to see her again when she comes back, that's all. What's wrong with that?

[angel.eyes]

So you are willing to sit around for two months for the possibility of a long-distance relationship after the summer ends when she moves closer and you're only one state away? This with someone who you dated twice?

 

Was she the only woman in your state? There's no one else to date? Why would no other woman who lives local to you want to date you?

[djcos25]

No. I'm still going to date, or try to date with how my lucks been going. But ideally I'd like to see her when she comes back.

Edited June 18, 2016 by djcos25

[joseb]

So I started using this app called Bumble. I like it much more then Tinder, I joke that it's a more "mature" version of Tinder lol.

 

Wow I'm just shocked you communicated with someone on Bumble!

I've pretty much written it off as Tinder with one massive bug.

Right now I have a dozen matches, but I know they are all a complete waste of time because in less than a day they will all expire. Not one woman has ever messaged me.

[djcos25]

Wow I'm just shocked you communicated with someone on Bumble!

I've pretty much written it off as Tinder with one massive bug.

Right now I have a dozen matches, but I know they are all a complete waste of time because in less than a day they will all expire. Not one woman has ever messaged me.

 

I've only met two people so far. Looks like it'll be 3 on Tuesday, assuming she doesn't flake. We'll see.

 

 

I just started talking to someone else, so out of curiosity I wanted to see what your opinions would be on this. I texted her Saturday evening at 5 just saying have a safe trip, hope to keep in touch and I'd like to see her when she gets back. Its now a day later and I haven't heard back. I noticed she "liked" a comment on her profile before I went to bed. If she had time to do that, she should have time to send a simple text back. I already deleted her number. I forgot to mention, after dinner Wednesday night I noticed she changed her profile picture on Bumble (to a pic that was already uploaded, not a new upload, not sure if that meant anything?)

 

I thought she was interested. I understand it was only 2 dates (drinks one night, dinner the next). Why ask me to keep in touch after both dates, why tell me how nice and sweet I am, why ask if I'm seeing anyone else, why ask how I feel about dating someone from another culture, and especially why ask to add me on facebook, say you had a great time after dinner.. then poof, nothing. If she wasn't feeling it she could have just told me, or even not add me on facebook. My friend suggested its possible she didn't want to get attached before moving? Thoughts?

 

So how long until I should delete her? A few days, a week? A friend said if I do, I probably won't hear from her at that point. If she wanted to keep in touch like she said, she shouldn't have ignored my text, and the phone works both ways. I just don't see the point in keeping her on my friends list.

 

Its just frustrating because I paid for both nights out (which I don't mind, I do every time), stayed with her until she found her car in the parking garage, she adds me on facebook.. then nothing. If it was just drinks then poof, fine, I'm used to that lol.

Edited June 19, 2016 by djcos25