2much4 Posted January 9, 2016 Share Posted January 9, 2016 Not really sure if I worded this correctly, English is not my first language =D I don't have any problem rejecting indecent advances from guys outside my social circle. If someone disrespects me in any way, I block them and ignore them. I struggle a lot more with handling things when we have friends in common or share the same workplace. Recently, I've had a lot of guys in a relationship hitting on me. This is not the kind of arrangement I am currently looking for, so I politely decline. Most of them I can easily avoid (by blocking them). There is one guy though that makes me particularly worried. We work at the same place and have several common friends, so blocking him or being nasty in any way is out of the question. He's been acting the following way: He will tell me at lengths how happy he is with his girlfriend and then say how sad he is to not be able to sleep with me because he is not a cheat, but he really misses having wild "§$% sex. Then he will drop comments about how much I am into him. I have already told him I think those comments are not appropriate and I don't like having anything to do with men in a relationship, but he did it again and actually stepped up a notch by getting more touchy. I think I made a mistake by saying it was just him having a GF and not stating that I was generally disinterested. I'm not interested in him, but I don't want to have to block him. It would get really awkward. How do I handle this diplomatically? Girls, what would YOU do in my situation? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 9, 2016 Share Posted January 9, 2016 Do sexual harassment laws exist in your country? Where I live, contact with HR, some evidence provided and some action would occur. Most of my customers surveil employees on video so, if similar for you, video evidence might exist. Document, document. I mention this because apparently the advances take place at work since you can easily avoid him otherwise. If other, please elaborate. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 2much4 Posted January 9, 2016 Author Share Posted January 9, 2016 Do sexual harassment laws exist in your country? Where I live, contact with HR, some evidence provided and some action would occur. Most of my customers surveil employees on video so, if similar for you, video evidence might exist. Document, document. I mention this because apparently the advances take place at work since you can easily avoid him otherwise. If other, please elaborate. Harassment laws do exist, I know how they work and know this wouldn't be considered harassment. If it was harassment I wouldn't hesitate one minute to block him or go to the police. My question just was how to handle this in a quiet manner. I want him to stop making suggestive comments/actions, but still be able to say hi and not have it being all weird at work. Link to post Share on other sites
thecrucible Posted January 10, 2016 Share Posted January 10, 2016 I guess if it was me I'd just try and avoid him and walk away if he says anything funny. A guy with a gf once tried to kiss me. He then sent me a message on Facebook the next day apologising for it but I chose to ignore it as I didn't want to end up embroiled in someone else's relationship drama. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Share Posted January 10, 2016 He's been acting the following way: He will tell me at lengths how happy he is with his girlfriend and then say how sad he is to not be able to sleep with me because he is not a cheat, but he really misses having wild "§$% sex. Then he will drop comments about how much I am into him. Sexual harassment. Go to your boss and report him. Link to post Share on other sites
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