Lily blue Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 Happy new Year to all. Ok I just wondering...is anyone can live with someone for life and never get married? I am living with my boyfriend and we both divorced once and I m ok not ever getting married and live with him for the rest of my life. Can live happy together without marrying the person right? As long as we both agreed and love each other and be faithful and take care of each other right? What you guys think about life long living BF/GF arrangements? Link to post Share on other sites
losangelena Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 I have friends who have been together for 20 years but have only been married for the last three. They really had no intention of getting married until the woman fell and broke her elbow (this was pre-Obamacare), and as a freelancer had very little health insurance. If they'd been married at the time, she could've been covered by the guy's insurance. Anyway, that's the only reason they got married. So yeah, I think if a couple wants to, they can make a go of it and be committed to one another without the legal aspect coming into it. Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 Ok I just wondering...is anyone can live with someone for life and never get married? Absolutely. I have no intention of ever getting married. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 Happy new Year to all. Ok I just wondering...is anyone can live with someone for life and never get married? I am living with my boyfriend and we both divorced once and I m ok not ever getting married and live with him for the rest of my life. Can live happy together without marrying the person right? As long as we both agreed and love each other and be faithful and take care of each other right? What you guys think about life long living BF/GF arrangements? My partner and I are coming up for 23 years unmarried. We have a house, kids, pets....the whole thing. Just not married. For us it works because our laws recognise us as being next of kin. If it wasn't for these laws, we probably would have gotten married. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 (edited) Been with my common law husband for 26 years. We never had kids, house is paid off, and have a cat. Canadian law says once you cohabitate for over a year, in the eyes of the law you are considered as married and have the same rights like a married couple. I never had any intention of getting married and having kids. I have been criticized for it from his family (they are catholic), and other people I have met, but I will forever stick to my guns on this topic. We don't even share bank accounts or credit cards. Our finances are separate, so we never fight about money. Bills are split down the middle 50/50. It works for us. Edited January 6, 2016 by smackie9 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lily blue Posted January 6, 2016 Author Share Posted January 6, 2016 Good to know. In my case, I don't pay any of the bills. He take care of everything. I buy stuff for the house things we need here and there but that is about it. We don't share bank account either. I m not working yet but I am planing to go to Korea in few months and go to sewing school and become a seamstress ....that I enjoy doing and will be good at it and maybe open a my own small shop and be independent and make my own money. I haven't ask for money nor care and I am paying my way to Korea too. I feel better that way and I make my own money would make me feel whole a lot better too. Anyway, I don't want to get married again but I want to be with him for life. If don't work out, well, that's life and if I work and have skills, I can fall back and sport my self. Thanks guys. Link to post Share on other sites
CherryVanilla Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 Happy new Year to all. Ok I just wondering...is anyone can live with someone for life and never get married? I am living with my boyfriend and we both divorced once and I m ok not ever getting married and live with him for the rest of my life. Can live happy together without marrying the person right? As long as we both agreed and love each other and be faithful and take care of each other right? What you guys think about life long living BF/GF arrangements? I think it is just fine. Marriage is not necessary for two people who love each other. Marriage is much more than just living with the person you love. It is first of all a contract, and the married life involves matters that we usually don't want discuss with our beloved ones - money, hygiene habits, cleaning up the house, etc. Many serious issues that can ruin a relationship if the couple is not ready for it. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 I believe in common-law arrangement (and happiness) only if you go to a notary and notarize a few aspects like protection of your personal assets and what is going to happen if one of you dies. We like to say marriage is just a paper but it's an important paper when someone dies. My ex-husband had been living with his common-law gf for 10 years when he died. They had a 9 yo together. Because they were not married and he had no notarized Will with her she got nothing. At the moment he died she was blocked out of bank accounts, she could not even buy groceries. She lost the house and everything in it and lost both cars. She would be in the street if it were not for his work life insurance. Don't be naive. If he wants to live together than make sure you have a Will and you won't end up broke in the street if he dies. It doesn't sound like a big deal now but in 10-15 years together it will be a big deal. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Happy new Year to all. Ok I just wondering...is anyone can live with someone for life and never get married? I am living with my boyfriend and we both divorced once and I m ok not ever getting married and live with him for the rest of my life. Can live happy together without marrying the person right? As long as we both agreed and love each other and be faithful and take care of each other right? What you guys think about life long living BF/GF arrangements? I don't need a marriage certificate. For me commitment comes from the heart....not a piece of paper. Unless you both want kids, personally I don't see the relevance. Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 If not planning to have children and / or merging finances, marriage doesn't matter for me. BUT I'm not planning on having kids or joined mortgage ever without marriage. It is waaaay too risky - if one of the partners die, the other is in a great trouble if kids or common finances existed... Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I don't particularly have an opinion either way because it's really personal to what you want to do. I would just advise you if you live in the US to perhaps get some other document in place for anything you care about. It sounds like the money portion is not important to you. The one issue I'm thinking of that I've heard heartbreaking stories about is if one or the other of you is in a life-threatening or deathbed situation. You may want to have (or he may want you to have) the right to make decisions about his healthcare in the event that he cannot. I think also you would want to make something so that you would be allowed access to him in hospital like a wife (even without being one). I think our common law is 7 years here but if this stuff matters to you check it out. If you are going to be with him "for life" health stuff is bound to come up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gold Pile Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Absolutely. I have no intention of ever getting married. So you say. Picture ole Gold Pile on bended knee, full of spices(like horny goat weed), and holding out a gold plated ring with a large faux diamond. After I croon out a love song, I ask you to make me the happiest man on Earth. I can't imagine you'd say no. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 So you say. Picture ole Gold Pile on ben No. ded knee, full of spices(like horny goat weed), and holding out a gold plated ring with a large faux diamond. After I croon out a love song, I ask you to make me the happiest man on Earth. I can't imagine you'd say no. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gold Pile Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 No. I see you're undecided. perhaps I should extend the invite to you AND your GF 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted January 8, 2016 Share Posted January 8, 2016 I see you're undecided. perhaps I should extend the invite to you AND your GF I actually don't even want to marry my GFs in all seriousness. Just never got on that whole marriage bandwagon. Link to post Share on other sites
Samhain Posted January 8, 2016 Share Posted January 8, 2016 I see you're undecided. perhaps I should extend the invite to you AND your GF You might have to use the "does this rag smell like chloroform to you" line. Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted January 8, 2016 Share Posted January 8, 2016 I can see that happening but it's personal choices. I have known couples who just lived together and had been together for almost 20 yrs then they finally decided to get married, then shortly after issues started snd know. They are getting an amicable d8vorce. 5hey are still going to be best f4iends. Each of them had been married before with kids. So each was involved with each others kids and no grandkids. 5he issue I have is when one dies the other doesn't benefit like with a pension check or social security. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted January 10, 2016 Share Posted January 10, 2016 I wouldn't do it indefinitely in a country that doesn't legally recognize de facto/common law Rs (AFAIK the US falls under that category). I agree with Gaeta, you should at least get some sort of notarized agreement up in that case. Link to post Share on other sites
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