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! I cried in front of my boyfriends entire family! Embarrassed now


KimP

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It wasn't even over anything serious like someone dying. I'm afraid they might have a negative opinion of me now. Here's what happened.

My boyfriend of almost one year picked me up to bring me to his parents house where he lives (we're both 18). His parents, sister and younger brother all live there. I've met them all a few times and seem to like me. But today we were sitting in the dining room having dinner when his very traditional and religious aunt made a surprise visit. When she noticed my bags and realized I was going to be sleeping over she went off on my boyfriend, his parents and me about how this was wrong, sinful and how i was disgusting for sleeping over with a boy i wasn't married to. She was just yelling and yelling and everyone actually tried to DENY that i was sleeping over and coming up with excuses for why i had overnight bags. But it only got worse with my boyfriends aunt slamming a big pot down on the table in front of me and i started crying. Like really crying my eyes out and shaking because i was just so uncomfortable. I never once raised my voice at her like everyone else was because I'm just not like that. I don't like being around anger or confrontation like that because it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. My boyfriend and his sister walked with me to the back yard trying to comfort me and telling that crazy woman to leave me alone. By the end of it my face was completely red with all my mascara on my face. They were all really nice and apologetic about it when the aunt finally left. I know she was extremely rude and judgmental but do you think my reaction might have been a bit much? I'm worried about what they might think of me now

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Hey girl, you've done nothing wrong! Almost every family has a crazy person and this aunt took the "honor" to be the one. She slammed a pot on the table???! SHE is emotionally unstable and overreacted, not you.

 

Look at it on the bright side (I know it is hard now): in a few months this will be just a story for the crazy aunt to share with your BF and your friends :)

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You just got initiated into their family dysfunctional crap...congratz.

 

No hun, you did nothing wrong. This will make you closer to them. If anything this aunt will never be welcomed in their home again.

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Yeah! Youve done nothing wrong. His aunt should apologise for her behaviour.

 

Besides its the 21st century. A couple can still stay under the same roof without having sex.

 

So its his aunts own fault for thinking that in the first place.

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You should have started giving your bf a handy and looked the Aunt right in the eye and said, "this is my family now, betch!"

 

That was a joke. His family doesn't seem to mind. We all have a crazy aunt/uncle/etc/etc. I'm fairly certain none of them were concerned by YOUR behaviour, but probably concerned by hers (the aunt).

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I'm not very religious, but I know my Bible. I would have hit her with, "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her." She would have taken several seats. Kablaaam!

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Sounds like you handled it like a pro won't worry about being embarrassed im sure the rest of the family is mortified they arnt thinking about your actions theyre prob feeling horribly guilty about putting you in that.

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When she noticed my bags and realized I was going to be sleeping over she went off on my boyfriend, his parents and me about how this was wrong, sinful and how i was disgusting for sleeping over with a boy i wasn't married to. She was just yelling and yelling and everyone actually tried to DENY that i was sleeping over and coming up with excuses for why i had overnight bags. But it only got worse with my boyfriends aunt slamming a big pot down on the table in front of me and i started crying.

 

Okay, you're only 18, so I will put this in perspective for you, this woman is what is known as a kook.

 

You did nothing wrong. She walks into a house has a tantrum and slams a pot in front of you.

 

It sounds like the rest of the family recognized her craziness and that's a good sign.

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You did nothing wrong but learn to control your emotions. The world is a mean, mean place. People will say all kinds of horrible things. You have to learn to grow a tough skin and buckle down rather than melting into a pot of tears every time someone says something mean. Take it as a life lesson.

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Christmas wouldn't be Christmas without the family loony making an appearance.

 

I wouldn't sweat it, you got upset because you weren't used to being yelled and screamed at by somebody you don't know from Adam. I'll bet your boyfriend and his family felt more embarrassed that somebody related to them would behave this way rather than caring about the very understandable fact that you got upset.

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It wasn't even over anything serious like someone dying. I'm afraid they might have a negative opinion of me now. Here's what happened.

My boyfriend of almost one year picked me up to bring me to his parents house where he lives (we're both 18). His parents, sister and younger brother all live there. I've met them all a few times and seem to like me. But today we were sitting in the dining room having dinner when his very traditional and religious aunt made a surprise visit. When she noticed my bags and realized I was going to be sleeping over she went off on my boyfriend, his parents and me about how this was wrong, sinful and how i was disgusting for sleeping over with a boy i wasn't married to. She was just yelling and yelling and everyone actually tried to DENY that i was sleeping over and coming up with excuses for why i had overnight bags. But it only got worse with my boyfriends aunt slamming a big pot down on the table in front of me and i started crying. Like really crying my eyes out and shaking because i was just so uncomfortable. I never once raised my voice at her like everyone else was because I'm just not like that. I don't like being around anger or confrontation like that because it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. My boyfriend and his sister walked with me to the back yard trying to comfort me and telling that crazy woman to leave me alone. By the end of it my face was completely red with all my mascara on my face. They were all really nice and apologetic about it when the aunt finally left. I know she was extremely rude and judgmental but do you think my reaction might have been a bit much? I'm worried about what they might think of me now

 

You stayed anyway, didn't you? If you had fallen apart and left, that might have sent a message that you don't stand up for yourself or succumbed to her pressure.

 

It was not her place to make such a scene and I'd say that the family knows she is a judgemental, overbearing, shrew with tremendous nerve to impose her "law" in their home. I'd say they understood why you were emotional and they did take "your side" it appears.

 

Don't worry about it.

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that crazy woman attacked you and she wasn't in her own home--that's the crusher of it all. What your boyfriend's parents allow in their home is none of her business and if she didn't like it, she could have turned around and left--quite frankly, his dad should have gotten her coat and purse and told her to leave his house right then and there.

 

I don't think you have anything to worry about with his family. You were not at fault in any of this. I would say next time, put your bags away so that no one can draw inferences about what you're doing there.

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