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Is Love Bombing and Bomb texting always a sign of dysfunction?


Celeste.Carol

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Celeste.Carol

I had never heard of this before experiencing it. Is this always a bad sign? Do normal men do this too? Curious.

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I've never experienced it either, but I'm pretty well certain it would put me off.

 

I'm turned-off by quick over-familiarity. I don't trust it.

 

First vote for dysfunctional.

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Stage5Clinger
I had never heard of this before experiencing it. Is this always a bad sign? Do normal men do this too? Curious.

 

Depends. If it's not overwhelming he might just really like you. If it's completely overbearing it's a sign of manipulation. Cults do this to initiate new members.

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What do you mean? Like, saying "I love you" too soon?

 

We may have different definitions of "text bombing..."

 

If the former, I've let an "I love you" slip too soon(1.5 mo in), but I say those words a LOT to pretty much everyone in my life. I use it loosely. She freaked when I said it. Regretted it for a long time.

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JasmineJones

Everyone has their own style of relating.

 

Is the "text bombing" making you feel uncomfortable or wary? Trust your gut.

 

My guy and I text insanely frequently but he's definitely not trying to manipulate me. We just have a lot in common and can't stop texting in between dates. To someone outside of the relationship it might look like text bombing I guess.

 

Sometimes it can genuinely mean two people are just really into each other.

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Celeste.Carol

No words of love, but constant bombardment of texts, flattery, attention, keen interest, and you have not even met yet. Overbearing but done in a way that is smooth, so it does not come across as weird if you have not experienced it. Like over 100 texts a day..

 

 

It is commonly written that it is specific to Sociopaths and Narcissistic, not too sure of the difference.

 

 

It is a form of manipulation I believe.

 

 

I know they mirror others behavior, is why I am asking if anyone normal does this?

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Celeste.Carol
Everyone has their own style of relating.

 

Is the "text bombing" making you feel uncomfortable or wary? Trust your gut.

 

My guy and I text insanely frequently but he's definitely not trying to manipulate me. We just have a lot in common and can't stop texting in between dates. To someone outside of the relationship it might look like text bombing I guess.

 

Sometimes it can genuinely mean two people are just really into each other.

 

It is a different scenario than once people are dating and communicate and keep up with each other. The text bombing halts suddenly as I have read in articles once they capture their prey.

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JasmineJones
No words of love, but constant bombardment of texts, flattery, attention, keen interest, and you have not even met yet. Overbearing but done in a way that is smooth, so it does not come across as weird if you have not experienced it. Like over 100 texts a day..

 

 

It is commonly written that it is specific to Sociopaths and Narcissistic, not too sure of the difference.

 

 

It is a form of manipulation I believe.

 

 

I know they mirror others behavior, is why I am asking if anyone normal does this?

 

Oh you've not even met yet? No normal person would behave like this.

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Stage5Clinger
I know they mirror others behavior, is why I am asking if anyone normal does this?

 

I do it sometimes when I really like a girl and think about her all the time. I glorify women sometimes and fall hard early. I'm just a really loving person and genuinely mean what I say when I'm being this way. Girls with lower self-esteem think it's fake sometimes because they don't believe they are beautiful when you genuinely are telling them how gorgeous they are.

 

Narcissists are more likely to pay no attention to you at all. Sociopaths are more likely to try and control you through manipulation of your emotions (a possibility here).

 

Give this guy a chance. He might just genuinely like you. It's also all very preliminary and it could *change if he ever gets a piece of dat ass.

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Celeste.Carol
I do it sometimes when I really like a girl and think about her all the time. I glorify women sometimes and fall hard early. I'm just a really loving person and genuinely mean what I say when I'm being this way. Girls with lower self-esteem think it's fake sometimes because they don't believe they are beautiful when you genuinely are telling them how gorgeous they are.

 

Narcissists are more likely to pay no attention to you at all. Sociopaths are more likely to try and control you through manipulation of your emotions (a possibility here).

 

Give this guy a chance. He might just genuinely like you. It's also all very preliminary and it could *change if he ever gets a piece of dat ass.

 

I had given the one doing this a chance. He ended up being a sociopath. He flat out told me at the end, he almost had me, owned me.

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Stage5Clinger
I had given the one doing this a chance. He ended up being a sociopath. He flat out told me at the end, he almost had me, owned me.

 

That's too bad. At least you figured it out. Just remember there are genuinely nice guys out there who will fall for you and act similar to this! You will know the difference if they also treat you with respect and care about what you want/how you're doing.

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StocksnBlondes

Vote for dysfunction. Dated one last year ...didn't know about it but had to learn the hard way. saw it in someone this year ...waited 2 weeks just to test my hypothesis that it = dysfunction. This guy didn't disappoint. I was disappointed it didn't work ..:he seemed like a good fit.

 

I have dated a few other guys who didn't do this at all ...that exhibited moderation of emotion but still let me know they really liked me.

 

It's a red flag /dealbreaker for me.

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Celeste.Carol
That's too bad. At least you figured it out. Just remember there are genuinely nice guys out there who will fall for you and act similar to this! You will know the difference if they also treat you with respect and care about what you want/how you're doing.

 

Seducing and Love Bombing/Dating a Sociopath. This is one of a few articles. I believe it is different, still not sure though, positive, different than what you are speaking of. But maybe not.

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Stage5Clinger
Seducing and Love Bombing/Dating a Sociopath. This is one of a few articles. I believe it is different, still not sure though, positive, different than what you are speaking of. But maybe not.

 

Another big difference is if and when the sociopath "switches". The love bombing is sort of a build up to get you high on it and used to the attention. Then they "switch" into an unloving monster to break you. People can be awful.

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Celeste.Carol
Vote for dysfunction. Dated one last year ...didn't know about it but had to learn the hard way. saw it in someone this year ...waited 2 weeks just to test my hypothesis that it = dysfunction. This guy didn't disappoint. I was disappointed it didn't work ..:he seemed like a good fit.

 

I have dated a few other guys who didn't do this at all ...that exhibited moderation of emotion but still let me know they really liked me.

 

It's a red flag /dealbreaker for me.

 

What happened, if you wish to share?

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Yeah, I'm going with the nutcase option.

 

The big red flag is the fact that you've not even met. It's one thing to gush about looking forward to meeting someone or that you've got a lot in common, but yeesh.

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todreaminblue

i feel uncomfortable when it becomes aggressive most text bombing becomes aggressive......in my experience anyway.....the tone of the texts changes........stalkerish......and yes that makes me uncomfortable...frequent texts dont bother me....but i use my gut and my instinct to differentiate frequent to too much by how comfortable i feel with the tone......what i have done with this...if i feel uncomfortable...i call the person and tell them that i dont like the way the messages are heading..straight up.... i take on agressors........a good person who didnt realize or was unintentionally over doing it,would normally apologise....agressors dont apologize they go defensive........and i have dealt with both.....deb

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when i bomb texted.. the relationship was over and i was in a very erratic desperate place, unlike my usual self, so.. yeah it was dysfunctional.

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StocksnBlondes
What happened, if you wish to share?

 

I'd be happy to share later when I have time ...baseball calls :)

 

It was a learning experience and a cautionary tale to those of whom haven't had the experience.

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Celeste.Carol
I'd be happy to share later when I have time ...baseball calls :)

 

It was a learning experience and a cautionary tale to those of whom haven't had the experience.[/quote

 

 

 

 

I would love to hear it. Plus it is a great learning curve for I had read that 5 percent of the population are sociopaths or have high tendencies, characteristics. People do not know this or aware (I was one of them) because they only associate the term with a few infamous murderers.

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I have a thread titled : He fell in love after 1 date.

 

You will see what love bombing is. It's suffocating.

 

I have met someone 2 times last week, he's texting me every 15 minutes. It drives me crazy. I had to tell him today that that pushes me away more than it attracts me and to give me some room to breath.

 

What I hate with these people is they're in love with love. They don't ask me anything about myself and if I talk about something of interest they look away like it's not interesting and they can't wait for me to stop talking so they can tell me again and again how pretty I am.

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Celeste.Carol
I have a thread titled : He fell in love after 1 date.

 

You will see what love bombing is. It's suffocating.

 

I have met someone 2 times last week, he's texting me every 15 minutes. It drives me crazy. I had to tell him today that that pushes me away more than it attracts me and to give me some room to breath.

 

What I hate with these people is they're in love with love. They don't ask me anything about myself and if I talk about something of interest they look away like it's not interesting and they can't wait for me to stop talking so they can tell me again and again how pretty I am.

 

Is it actually sociopathic love bombing/texting or is he just crazy about you...??

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Celeste.Carol

While reading up on socio's I have read Borderline Males will Love bomb but but Gaeta! they cling, hold on for Dear Life. Watch your legs there.You may gotcha a....:p

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Is it actually sociopathic love bombing/texting or is he just crazy about you...??

 

I had men crazy about me and they respected my time. This one doesn't. At the moment I set foot in my home he bugs me none stop, he doesn't care I am tired, worked overtime, I didn't have time to eat, he just care about him and getting his fix of me.

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todreaminblue
I had men crazy about me and they respected my time. This one doesn't. At the moment I set foot in my home he bugs me none stop, he doesn't care I am tired, worked overtime, I didn't have time to eat, he just care about him and getting his fix of me.

 

 

its funny you say fix gaeta because a guy who used to bomb me would say i have to have my fix of deb or i have had my fix of deb today.almost liek a counselling session...in my experience bomb texting comes from a place of loneliness and boredom...and i try to understand where they are coming from...you are right its exhausting and not really in lieu with a happy healthy relationship ...deb

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