regdent Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 Moved to a new city almost four months ago for residency and started online dating the moment I moved out here. A month into it, I got matched with a girl who happens to be in the same field and is at the same school. I was really into her and had a lot of fun spending time with her. Then about 6-7 weeks ago, she decided to call it quits, saying she didn't feel a romantic connection and we may be better off being friends. I was shocked because I thought she was into me. Because we are in the same building everyday, I was constantly reminded of her. Then we would have occasional run-ins. We try to be cordial, but I know both of us feel awkward around each other. We would send random texts to each other occasionally, but these usually end up being kinda passive-aggressive. Last week, we ran into each other at a random bar/lounge. Kinda crazy considering how big this city is. She was out with her brother, whom I met while we were briefly dating, her roommate, and a few friends of hers. She seemed surprised and didn't quite know what to do when she saw me there. We said hi, but we basically avoided each other the entire night. It didn't feel good at all. Then I saw her yesterday during the day. She seemed pretty stressed, so I texted her, "Doing okay? Saw you earlier this morning. You seemed stressed." Then we texted a little bit talking about random stuff. A few hours later, she invited me to an event this weekend she's organizing. "It's going to be a blast, so you're welcome to join if you want" is what she said. Can't decide whether it's a good idea to go or not. I think I still have some residual feelings for her unfortunately. One of my best friends said, "I guess this is the opportunity to find out how she feels about you right now. It could go either way I guess." Another best friend said, "If I were you, I might just chill man. Can't get caught up getting involved with everything she brings up on a whim." And a mutual friend of me and her said, "You will continue to run into her for at least another 9 months, so you should probably get used to it and be comfortable with it eventually." If you were me, what would you do? And if you decide to go to this event, how would you act at the event? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 Because she is the event organizer I would stay away. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 What sort of "event"? Link to post Share on other sites
Jinx01 Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 It's probably a better call to not go. It would be awkward for both of you and might end up being more dramatic than you would expect. Just be cool say yo I had a plan with some friends instead and don't let this girl string you along. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 What sort of "event"? This is important ^^^. If this is an event where co-workers or people in your field will be, you should go. But do not go intending to make a romantic connection with anyone, including her. Go to be generally social and gracious. Link to post Share on other sites
PogoStick Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 You should go to the event IF you can control your feelings. She's inviting you as a friend and made it clear that's what she wants with you. If you can't stop obsessing then don't go. Ideally, you go, and hit it off with one of her amazing, cute friends. Not to be spiteful, but because it's seizing the moment. She's your friend and you should accept it. She could end up being the one who connects you with your next great girlfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
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