Bobbi7 Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Had a great first date with this guy, we have plans on getting together after he gets back. He hasn't texted me at all while on his trip. Should I be worried? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 No it's normal. I met someone right before my vacations and I didn't text him at all while I was gone. I don't know him enough to text from my vacation and also I have no clue if I will like him still after our 2nd meeting so I avoid creating a text-phone connection with someone I'm unsure about. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Had a great first date with this guy, we have plans on getting together after he gets back. He hasn't texted me at all while on his trip. Should I be worried? After one date, if you are worrying at all, it's too much. Why would a guy you just met bother to take even 5 minutes to get in touch with you while on vacation? Sure, it would be a nice thing and show he really likes you already, but he's on vacation, he should be enjoying it and not thinking about what's going on at home. You should be enjoying your life too now. Did he communicate with you at all after the date? You say there are plans for getting together when he gets back. Are they set plans with a specific day, etc? If that's case, it's a good thing. If they are just "let's get together when I get back, well, it's up in the air and you'll just have to wait and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Had a great first date with this guy, we have plans on getting together after he gets back. He hasn't texted me at all while on his trip. Should I be worried? Worried about what? You've gone out one time. ONE TIME. It's not like you two are in an established, committed, exclusive relationship and he decided not to get in touch. Chill... let the guy miss you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
regine_phalange Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 We don't live in the era of landlines and post office anymore, there are mobiles and wireless networks now. This would probably send me the message that he's not that interested in keeping in touch -> not that interested in general. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
xcupid Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 You're not his priority. He doesn't know you well enough to keep in contact. If he was *really* interested in you he'd have kept in touch with you. The vacation broke the "flow" of things. Now you both will have to re-establish contact when he returns - which he should initiate if he's interested. I hope it works out the way you want it to. Link to post Share on other sites
Vintage79 Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Bobbi - you're absolutely worrying too much, and your insecurities are beginning to show - it's fine here on the forum, but don't show that side off to the guy (at least yet). You went out once and you know he's on a trip - regular contact would probably actually be a bit weird (i.e. prioritizing someone he doesn't know over a vacation he's planning for a while). Sure, it's easy to contact someone via text/phone these days, but let him have his space - at this point, the two of you are only a small step away from being nothing to each other, so don't fret it. If it bothers you that much, send him a text and ask him how his trip is going to try to a coax a response out of him, but other than that, give him his space on the trip and just reconnect when he gets back. If you send him a text and he doesn't respond, don't read into it... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bobbi7 Posted July 20, 2015 Author Share Posted July 20, 2015 Bobbi - you're absolutely worrying too much, and your insecurities are beginning to show - it's fine here on the forum, but don't show that side off to the guy (at least yet). You went out once and you know he's on a trip - regular contact would probably actually be a bit weird (i.e. prioritizing someone he doesn't know over a vacation he's planning for a while). Sure, it's easy to contact someone via text/phone these days, but let him have his space - at this point, the two of you are only a small step away from being nothing to each other, so don't fret it. If it bothers you that much, send him a text and ask him how his trip is going to try to a coax a response out of him, but other than that, give him his space on the trip and just reconnect when he gets back. If you send him a text and he doesn't respond, don't read into it... How are my insecurities showing? I always think the worst-either he's flirting with someone else and he will forget all about me. How do I relax? I always get like this. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 How are my insecurities showing? I always think the worst-either he's flirting with someone else and he will forget all about me. How do I relax? I always get like this. You cannot worry to lose something you don't have. The first time you meet someone it's not even a date. It's a first contact, a first face to face meeting. Don't put any value into it. If he walks, he walks and it's no big deal. You aren't losing anything. Maybe you won't even like him on your 2nd date right! Now what you need to do is realize you have no control over if he likes you or not, over if he meets someone else or not. It's out of your hands so why worry! You go out and have fun. What will be, will be. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 How are my insecurities showing? I always think the worst-either he's flirting with someone else and he will forget all about me. How do I relax? I always get like this. Just let the guy go on vacation and have some fun. Go have some fun yourself. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 How are my insecurities showing? Like this: I always think the worst-either he's flirting with someone else and he will forget all about me. How do I relax? I always get like this. You've only been on one date. Reeelax. Neither of you are nor should you be a priority to each other. Holidays happen in summer. It's OK! Just get on with your own life as it was before you met him. Link to post Share on other sites
casey.lives Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 vacation is vacation. you're not his gf. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 How are my insecurities showing? I always think the worst-either he's flirting with someone else and he will forget all about me. How do I relax? I always get like this. That right there is insecurity sweetie..... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 You're a woman he's had one date with. He doesn't know you well enough to be overly invested yet. Since plans are set, he's focusing on enjoying his vacation. If I was in your situation, I'd do this. Wait until the day before the date when he's back in town. Then send a quick text "Hope your trip went well. See u tmrw!" Then all he has to do is send a confirmation text back. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Bobbi, you overthink everything. I think you have some anxiety you might want to look into with a professional. Literally everything makes you anxious, your job, a guy you JUST met, talking to people. What if I pill once a day could just make you chill out and be comfortable? What if. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 How are my insecurities showing? I always think the worst-either he's flirting with someone else and he will forget all about me. How do I relax? I always get like this. Yes, those two things may be happening or they may not be happening. You have to accept that the one date before he went on vacation doesn't have the legs to support your expectations. At this stage, he doesn't owe you anything. He is quite free to flirt with whomever he wishes, as do you. You don't owe him anything, either. He is most likely enjoying himself with people he's known a whole lot longer than he's known you. You relax by quit making him the center of your universe already. What's going to happen is going to happen whether you worry about it or not. Stop choosing to be like that. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted July 20, 2015 Share Posted July 20, 2015 Bobbi....try yoga! Yoga (and Pilates) REALLY help me relax and get centered in my thoughts..... Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted July 21, 2015 Share Posted July 21, 2015 unless we had sex & I wanted to have sex again I don't use my phone except to talk to my kids when on vacation. I'm in the water most of the time & drunk. lol. Last thing on my mind is texting a woman I went on one date with that I don't even know if she likes me or not. Link to post Share on other sites
Qboro90 Posted July 22, 2015 Share Posted July 22, 2015 You had ONE date with him. He's not your boyfriend so why would he text you while on vacation? If he went somewhere out of the country then it's even more simple. It costs an absurd amount of money if you use your cellphone outside of the U.S.. Most people I know don't text or make calls when they go on vacation. If they need to reach family they'll use the app Viber which is free and doesn't charge your accoint. Just wait till he gets back and texts you. Don't be too eager to text him when you know he's home either. Don't wanna come off like your needy and spent the whole week thinking about him and overanalyzing things Link to post Share on other sites
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