Jump to content

Am I his rebound girl?


pink_cupcake

Recommended Posts

Am i his “texting” rebound girl?

 

Apologies for my bad English.

Met this guy while i was travelling in a different country. We hit it off well and hooked up. I went back to see him for a weekend and we had the best time. Since then, he has been texting me nearly every day for two month now, even though we both agreed we don’t want a long distance relationship. We text from dusk till dawn and would talk about our daily routines, flirt and just have fun. He is incredibly affectionate and is the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. He has given me so much emotionally.

 

 

It was all good, until he told me (after a month) that he ran into his ex at a private party. He made a big jealousy scene, with him ending up crying. This came as a shock to me, to say the least. He has never talked about her. They only dated for 3 month and have been separated for 3 month, when I’ve met him. She broke up with him due to cultural reasons (he has a kid, which is not accepted) even though she claims she still loves him. He says he gave up his whole life for her: broke up with his gf of 10 years (mother of his kid) and lost all his friends in the process, because they didn’t approve.

 

This is a sad story and I feel sorry in a way. Ive asked him, what we were and he said, he didn’t know. When he met me, he was really low & then I came along and cheered him up. He never thought, we would see each other again, after my trip, but then he got to know me and really liked me. He said, he was about to get over his ex with me, but then I had to leave. He said, he honestly thinks, that we could work if I was local, but he can’t’ have a relationship with someone he only gets to see 4 times a year. We agreed to stay friends.

 

We never had a chance to resolve things properly though as he went on a backpacking trip to a remote country for 3 weeks. The first week he has contacted me nearly every day, telling me about his whereabouts. The second week he expected me to initiate, but I didn’t, because I wasn’t sure I could keep doing this. He texted me after 3 days and seemed really angry. After I’ve told him that I was going out on the weekend, he made a snarky remark and I’ve barely heard a word from him for a week. I asked if everything was ok and he replied he doesn’t want to be rude on the phone, its why his answers were short. Not sure what he implied with this statement.

Apparently he has been partying every day until the wee hours, which is alarming to me, because he has never been the typ. He partied like crazy after his break up, hooking up with loads of girls until he met me. This sounds like he is basically back at square one, not coping with this break up at all. They broke up nearly 6 month ago though. His holiday is nearly over. He contacted me again last night, repeatedly telling me he partied too much and that he wants to go home now. He seemed liked his old self again.

 

I have developed a lot of feelings for him and would be prepared to give this a shot and even move at some point. But it looks like I am wasting my time.

I am at a loss as to why he is still talking to me. He hasn’t mentioned his ex again and doesn’t seem to want to dump his emotional waste on me. What can I possibly give him through texting? He said I help him. Any real life woman should be able to cheer him up more than I do!! He is very good looking and he gets approached by girls all the time. He met a few girls who wanted more, but he turned them all down. Why is he keeping me around though? Is it safer, because I can’t demand anything, like going on a date?

He said once I make him feel special. Does he need someone to boost his ego and numb the pain? Am I his rebound texting girl? Has this ever been about me?

 

He has shown signs of jealousy before. On the weekend we catched up, I got hit on while he was in the bathroom. He got angry and pushed the guy away. Also, when I went out dancing one night, he told me not kiss anyone & questioned me about it later: at what time I got home and if I got chatted up.

What’s going on with him? Why does he mention this partying so much? Should I run? I feel more like putting up a fight. I don't know what to make of all this. He is important to me.

 

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this and is kind enough to share their insight. :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
Am i his “texting” rebound girl?

 

Apologies for my bad English.

Met this guy while i was travelling in a different country. We hit it off well and hooked up. I went back to see him for a weekend and we had the best time. Since then, he has been texting me nearly every day for two month now, even though we both agreed we don’t want a long distance relationship. We text from dusk till dawn and would talk about our daily routines, flirt and just have fun. He is incredibly affectionate and is the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. He has given me so much emotionally.

 

 

It was all good, until he told me (after a month) that he ran into his ex at a private party. He made a big jealousy scene, with him ending up crying. This came as a shock to me, to say the least. He has never talked about her. They only dated for 3 month and have been separated for 3 month, when I’ve met him. She broke up with him due to cultural reasons (he has a kid, which is not accepted) even though she claims she still loves him. He says he gave up his whole life for her: broke up with his gf of 10 years (mother of his kid) and lost all his friends in the process, because they didn’t approve.

 

This is a sad story and I feel sorry in a way. Ive asked him, what we were and he said, he didn’t know. When he met me, he was really low & then I came along and cheered him up. He never thought, we would see each other again, after my trip, but then he got to know me and really liked me. He said, he was about to get over his ex with me, but then I had to leave. He said, he honestly thinks, that we could work if I was local, but he can’t’ have a relationship with someone he only gets to see 4 times a year. We agreed to stay friends.

 

We never had a chance to resolve things properly though as he went on a backpacking trip to a remote country for 3 weeks. The first week he has contacted me nearly every day, telling me about his whereabouts. The second week he expected me to initiate, but I didn’t, because I wasn’t sure I could keep doing this. He texted me after 3 days and seemed really angry. After I’ve told him that I was going out on the weekend, he made a snarky remark and I’ve barely heard a word from him for a week. I asked if everything was ok and he replied he doesn’t want to be rude on the phone, its why his answers were short. Not sure what he implied with this statement.

Apparently he has been partying every day until the wee hours, which is alarming to me, because he has never been the typ. He partied like crazy after his break up, hooking up with loads of girls until he met me. This sounds like he is basically back at square one, not coping with this break up at all. They broke up nearly 6 month ago though. His holiday is nearly over. He contacted me again last night, repeatedly telling me he partied too much and that he wants to go home now. He seemed liked his old self again.

 

I have developed a lot of feelings for him and would be prepared to give this a shot and even move at some point. But it looks like I am wasting my time.

I am at a loss as to why he is still talking to me. He hasn’t mentioned his ex again and doesn’t seem to want to dump his emotional waste on me. What can I possibly give him through texting? He said I help him. Any real life woman should be able to cheer him up more than I do!! He is very good looking and he gets approached by girls all the time. He met a few girls who wanted more, but he turned them all down. Why is he keeping me around though? Is it safer, because I can’t demand anything, like going on a date?

He said once I make him feel special. Does he need someone to boost his ego and numb the pain? Am I his rebound texting girl? Has this ever been about me?

 

He has shown signs of jealousy before. On the weekend we catched up, I got hit on while he was in the bathroom. He got angry and pushed the guy away. Also, when I went out dancing one night, he told me not kiss anyone & questioned me about it later: at what time I got home and if I got chatted up.

What’s going on with him? Why does he mention this partying so much? Should I run? I feel more like putting up a fight. I don't know what to make of all this. He is important to me.

 

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this and is kind enough to share their insight. :)

 

Put up a fight for what? A guy you've never me in person who texts you and makes you feel good and is jealous, tells you he turns down women for you and has been crying over a woman he dated for three months? This man is struggling with something . . . and it's not you.

 

Stop texting him. Block him. Go out and meet people! Get off the phone.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Redhead hit the nail on the hiz-head.

OP thinks that she can fix this guy, and make him tailor made for her.

 

This guy is struggling with some major insecurities.

 

Try seeing other guys OP

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...