Georgia2014 Posted August 7, 2014 Share Posted August 7, 2014 (edited) There is this guy I am friends with. We met on a dating site over a year ago. He said he thought of me more as a friend. We hung out a lot and I spent the night at his house. I slept in his room and he slept downstairs. He lives with his mother. He even helped me get my dog. He knew what breed age color and gender I wanted. He even took me to go get her. He had also invited me on a trip with him and his mom. Once he said he saw him as a friend I started dating other guys. He stopped talking to me when I got engaged. Then as soon as he found out the engagement was over he started talking to me again. I do know he has had two marriages that ended badly. So he could be afraid of being hurt. Should I tell him how I feel? I really do like him I always have. He and I also live similar lifestyles. Which is another reason I like him. My parents like him and his mom seems to like me. Should I just accept him as a friend or should I tell him how I feel? Edited August 7, 2014 by Georgia2014 Link to post Share on other sites
Million.to.1 Posted August 7, 2014 Share Posted August 7, 2014 Why don't you ask him why he disappeared when you had a boyfriend/ fiancée? Friends don't do that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Assasda Posted August 7, 2014 Share Posted August 7, 2014 Well you can show him you like him without explicitly telling him. cant you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Georgia2014 Posted August 7, 2014 Author Share Posted August 7, 2014 Well you can show him you like him without explicitly telling him. cant you? The problem is we talk through texting. We don't see each other in person. It's been nearly a year since we saw each other. Link to post Share on other sites
eching Posted August 7, 2014 Share Posted August 7, 2014 If this is how you really feel, you really should take control and tell him! You can explain your feelings to him, and in order not to scare him off, tell him you don't expect him to want to jump into a relationship with you, but that you just want him to know how you feel. This way, if he's hesitant, you can continue being friends until he's ready, since everything is in the open; or if he returns your feelings, he can immediately tell you since you've brought it up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted August 7, 2014 Share Posted August 7, 2014 Just ask him if he's seeing anyone currently. If he's not, tell him that you really like him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Georgia2014 Posted August 12, 2014 Author Share Posted August 12, 2014 (edited) If this is how you really feel, you really should take control and tell him! You can explain your feelings to him, and in order not to scare him off, tell him you don't expect him to want to jump into a relationship with you, but that you just want him to know how you feel. This way, if he's hesitant, you can continue being friends until he's ready, since everything is in the open; or if he returns your feelings, he can immediately tell you since you've brought it up. Thank you for your advice! I think I will tell him. I am just worried about rejection. I have really low self esteem. Edited August 12, 2014 by Georgia2014 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 12, 2014 Share Posted August 12, 2014 Oh boy. Don't tell him you like him. Announcements never work out well. He already told you he only likes you as a friend. Unless you know that has changed, you are setting yourself up for rejection. If you can't stand to only be his friend -- a position which will guarentee you a front row seat for his next relationship until his new GF decides that you are a threat & that to keep her he must get rid of you -- distance yourself from him for your own peace of mind. It may help if you tell him you like him & he then forces that issue. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted August 12, 2014 Share Posted August 12, 2014 ^ I agree. For one thing, anything important needs to be done face to face so that you can really know the reaction and also if it's a positive one, get the benefit of that reaction. If you can't be face to face, he can't be into you that way. So instead of totally humiliating yourself, tell him you and some friends are going to a bar or party or hang out at the lake, whatever and invite him casually and don't expect it to be like a date but see then how much attention he gives you and you will have your answer. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 12, 2014 Share Posted August 12, 2014 Listen to Preraph! That's a great idea. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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