NikadVise Posted June 24, 2014 Share Posted June 24, 2014 I met him about three years ago. He lived in the same city as me for a while but then moved back home, so we never really became friends or kept in touch. I was also interested in his friend back then (now former friend). Over the years he made his interest known. I saw him again 1/2 a year ago since he moved back to my city. And he is friends with my best friends (it's a small city). 1/2 a year ago I was in a bar with my friends and he hit on me again, but I brushed it off (I was going through a lot of things at the time so brushed him off again). 2-3 weeks ago he sends me a message on FB asking me to go out. We went out with mutual friends. The entire night he held and caressed my hand. He leaned in many times, leaned his head against mine. I went back to his place but passed out right away (we had been out all night). Next day we went to the mountains with friends. He kept staring at me, walked by me a few times and brushed his shoulder against mine. He had to drive back to the city, but turned to me and said i'm coming back. That night on the mountains we take a walk up a hill, but in our drunken state of minds, we didn't manage to sleep together. We tried but it just couldn't happen. He drove me home and asked me whether I'm going out tomorrow, and see u there. I saw him a few times after that, we went out with friends, he'd always stand or sit next to me. At one point he leaned in and placed his hand on my thigh. But Idk, it just fizzled out. Maybe I didn't take enough initiative. I felt overwhelmed, I couldn't reason to myself why do I feel a spark now, and not 3 years ago. Contact just stopped. I called him last weekend to see if he is still out (he had told me he's going out that evening) and he didn't respond. I saw him last night. We were with friends again. He felt comfortable speaking with everybody except with me. He ignores me. Doesn't address me. I try to initiate conversation. He responds bluntly. He isn't rude. He just doesn't feel at ease and avoids eye contact. I don't know what to make of this. Whether to drop it. Or to meet with him and tell him directly, to be honest with him. I do not know whether he just lost interest. Can he lose interest just all of a sudden, after several years of trying, after spending two weeks together? Just like that? Or could it be something else? I saw him leaving last night with a girl, but that could be his friend. The first night I went out with him, she was there with some other girl, but then he left them behind to hang out with me the rest of the night. So I'm not sure if he has moved on. If he's not interested why is he ignoring me? This isn't a case of wanting what I can't have or trying to get his interest back for my own ego. Just to make that clear. I'm genuinely interested in this man. Idk, maybe deep down I was always interested in him, but didn't let myself admit it. Over the past 1/2 year, our interactions would always be filled with tension. I don't know what to do. What to do when someone ignores you all of a sudden and you can't find the words to express yourself? Link to post Share on other sites
Assasda Posted June 24, 2014 Share Posted June 24, 2014 I think he was trying too hard before, now he's not trying hard and being himself and you appreciate him for that. It's the old saying "Be yourself" He wasnt himself when he was trying to get with you. Anyway, I'd say move on. If you get with him, he'd probably go back to his old ways and turn you off again Link to post Share on other sites
Author NikadVise Posted June 24, 2014 Author Share Posted June 24, 2014 Its just that, I was never turned off by him. I'm just trying to see if there is any interest on his part any longer. I appreciated him over the past 2 weeks. He opened up to me one night and spoke for over an hour about his life, family, what he wants out of life, took my hand and caressed it. I listened to him. Now I don't know what to do about the silence. I was never put off by him. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted June 24, 2014 Share Posted June 24, 2014 I would say you have to bite the bullet......you rejected him....so now to show interest you have to let it be known if you cant bite the bullet.....it just isnt meant to be......and thats ok......if you let him go...if you can let him go and not regret it.....its up to you and what you really want from him if you are willing to take the risk...is he worth it?..only you know if he is....deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NikadVise Posted June 24, 2014 Author Share Posted June 24, 2014 I have a strong feeling that he is worth it. I don't know whats going on his mind. Why the silent treatment all of a sudden. Maybe he realized he really isn't interested. Maybe it was about the chase. But I don't know that for certain. Maybe only way to know is to confront him about it. Because I know he won't confront me. I don't think he'll take the risk. Link to post Share on other sites
Assasda Posted June 24, 2014 Share Posted June 24, 2014 Ok, what you do is this. Tell him that you want to go someplace with him. Set a date, and ask him to come out with you. - I think he will. But if he goes back to being unattractive and you start having no interest in him again, you can only blame yourself 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NikadVise Posted June 24, 2014 Author Share Posted June 24, 2014 Yes, I was thinking of doing just that. I don't have doubts about this. I don't believe I will go back to finding him unattractive. I hit myself over the head for rejecting him all those times. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted June 24, 2014 Share Posted June 24, 2014 I have a strong feeling that he is worth it. I don't know whats going on his mind. Why the silent treatment all of a sudden. Maybe he realized he really isn't interested. Maybe it was about the chase. But I don't know that for certain. Maybe only way to know is to confront him about it. Because I know he won't confront me. I don't think he'll take the risk. as far as the chase goes people who are in it for the chase wouldn't be ignoring you......or get hurt .....or have any reaction....they would just move on......the hunt is the fun part.....win or lose..they just go on to the next hunt and the dont have any feelings of disappointment if they are well versed in hunting chicks.......you will only know if he was that way or another by confronting as you said...to me he doesn't seem that way......so i hope the very best for you......deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author NikadVise Posted June 24, 2014 Author Share Posted June 24, 2014 Thanks. that fear that he was in it for the chase the whole time is still active in my mind, so that accounts for my fear in confronting him. He just seems too tense around me, unwilling to speak to me, like he has nothing to say. I guess if he was in it for the chase, maybe he'd be behaving differently around me. Only by confronting him will I know. Link to post Share on other sites
WhiteButton Posted June 24, 2014 Share Posted June 24, 2014 Its possible that he thought that you were not into him, and moved on. I personally i give a girl few chances but if she is not responding back and giving me some clues that she is into me or showing some initiative from her end, i move on. Its a two way street ladies! BTW where are you from, i have a feeling you are from Bosnia/Serbia/Croatia region judging by your nickname? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NikadVise Posted June 25, 2014 Author Share Posted June 25, 2014 No, I'm not from that region. don't remember how I came up with it. Link to post Share on other sites
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