avoforastig Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 Due to some recent flaking, I was wondering if anyone finds a pre-date confirmation, such as the day before or earlier the same day, to be beneficial? If so, what is more useful? I'm just tired of wasting time/energy on flakes. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I've always gone into such interactions as two responsible adults meeting to enjoy each other's company and only made interim contact if something came up and a reschedule was necessary (rare!). Early dates were always at a place/doing something I enjoyed and I can enjoy them with or without the company of an otherwise stranger. Of course, one 'flake' and the stranger is binned so there's really no downside that I can see. The younger generations who appear to be joined at the hip by their smartphones may have a differing perspective on such matters and 'checking up' on a potential date could be within the realm of their normal behaviors. If you find yourself amongst that group, then shoot them a quick and flirty text day of. One, IMO. That's enough. Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I'd confirm early in the day if you were meeting after work or in the evening. That might nip some last minute flakes in the bud. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I always make sure a meet up is going to happen on the day a few hours beforehand. If I hear nothing from them I will send a quick text. If that doesn't get a reply in enough time to get ready to be at the arranged venue I don't go and will have made other plans. It's only happened once to me that I sent a text that morning and got no reply. He did reply about 4 hours later but by the time he replied I had arranged to do something else and was on my way to a free music festival in London for the day. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 I normally firm up the day before or the morning of with a quick - "hey hope all is going well with you. Are you still good for (time and location). Really looking forward to seeing you!" Just smart with the busy lives we lead. Link to post Share on other sites
Mo_Do Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 How many times have you been flaked on? The issue may not be them... Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 especially if it's somebody I didn't previously know IRL, I always reached out earlier the day of to confirm. As much as I rail against it for conversations, this is an instance where I think texting is a marvelous tool! Link to post Share on other sites
Author avoforastig Posted May 1, 2014 Author Share Posted May 1, 2014 How many times have you been flaked on? The issue may not be them... I've had maybe 4-5 flakes over the past 10 months, but 2 recently. What would I do to influence a flake? I went ahead and sent a confirmation text to firm things up a time as a 30 minute starting time window was left open to meet tomorrow. E.g. Let's meet around 830-9. No response yet though Link to post Share on other sites
Author avoforastig Posted May 1, 2014 Author Share Posted May 1, 2014 I normally firm up the day before or the morning of with a quick - "hey hope all is going well with you. Are you still good for (time and location). Really looking forward to seeing you!" Just smart with the busy lives we lead. I sent the day before text to narrow down a meeting time, if there is no response, what then? Link to post Share on other sites
Author avoforastig Posted May 1, 2014 Author Share Posted May 1, 2014 I sent the day before text to narrow down a meeting time, if there is no response, what then? Could the confirmation text be negatively perceived in any way? Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 Could the confirmation text be negatively perceived in any way? Er...course it could be..it would depend upon the dynamics you have and what is written. It is also better to confirm on the day, not the day before tbh. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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