She wants me...she wants me not...ugh, she wants me?

[Haydaman712]

'Duh hell am I gonna do? I need your help folks!

 

 

 

Background

Age - 23

Senior In College

Graduation - 2 weeks

 

Last semester I was placed into a group for a project of which I became group leader.

One of the girls in the group happened to be breathtakingly beautiful....

 

She kept giving me little hints over time that she was interested in me. Always asking me questions about my life, personal hobbies, goals, etc...telling me that I was a good writer...and not to mention those sideways head-to-toe glances that I would catch her giving me from time to time. But I didn't want to make any bold moves that would make things awkward for our continued group interaction.

 

Then one day while meeting with the group we were discussing group roles. While trying to designate the "Creative Role" the girl in question said "Oh geez not me, I'm not creative or anything like that!" To which I responded with a warm smile "Sure you are!" Then she shot me the sexiest smile ever, and proceeded to stare at me for about five seconds straight...Her eyes were dimmed and dreamy, and she was biting her lip. It was frickin' mesmerizing and it gave me chills. I was literally dumbfounded. Then I knew. I had to have her.

 

I ended up asking her out on a date to which she agreed on a Friday night in late December. I went over to her place and we walked through town. There was actually a christmas parade too, the weather was perfectly seasonal, and it felt like a dream. On the way to the restaurant she kept bumping into me even though we had plenty of sidewalk. Not sure if she wanted to hold hands or not. I was pretty nervous but it actually ended up being awesome. There was no awkwardness or lapses in conversation. I had a great time. And she agreed to come home with me .

 

When we got inside she said.

Her - "Is anyone home?"

Me - "Yeah, my roommates."

Her -"Are you sure? I don't think anyones home..."

Me - "Nope there definitely here, lets go say hi!" (dumbest move ever)

 

Instead of having making out/having sex with her I decided to show her off to roommates instead, for like 20 minutes before going back down to my room. I grabbed two beers and said we should watch some T.V. and she said "Oh I actually have to go!." And she stood there at the door waiting to say goodbye to me. I just walked over and gave her hug. Instead of kissing her like I should have. (story of every man's life amirite?) But she wanted to meet up later at the bar with her friends, and she said she would text me. This was at 9pm.

 

I never got that text.

But at 2:20 AM she texted me that she that she had no service in the bar she was at and wanted to know if I had gone out anyway. (You really couldn't walk outside of the bar to text me?)

I responded with "nope I just stayed in tonight, but I had a great time tonight and we should do something tomorrow!" She never texted me back. Fast forward to Tuesday... I texted her to study for finals but she said she was busy... I didn't text her for about 3 weeks. Then I finally caved and asked her out again over Christmas Break. She lives two hours away and she said that she isn't usually in town over break but that she would "let me know" if she was. I didn't respond for two days. Then I sent the deal breaker text in early January. I said that we should go to Philly (about an hour from school) for another date and that I had several fun things planned. I even added this dumb line.."Come hungry and forget the heels"...This was the first time she never responded to me. Looking back I came off very creepy, like we were already BF/GF. I haven't texted her since, and she hasn't texted me. I ended up deleting her number the next day. She wanted to distance herself from me completely, and I understood that. So I gave it to her. I know that begging and pleading will just make it worse.

 

At the beginning of the Spring Semester in February I happened to be at a bar where she was with her friends. I could tell she told them about me and my text because they shot me glances smiling every now and then. And she was ignoring me, so I just brushed it off. I wouldn't see her again until a few weeks ago walking to class. At this point it's been 3 months since I had spoken to her, and two months since I had seen in her person. When I spotted her she was already staring at me with the warmest smile, and when we walked by each other I smiled back and kept on my way. Since then I've been seeing her every few days... We say hi to each other in passing but there is no conversation. The other weekend at the bar her friends were just staring at me... and then a few minutes later she appeared...her and her friends made their way over to me and just stood literally right next to me and my friends for about 20 minutes. She stood facing me the whole time but I never said anything to her. I don't know if she was putting herself back into my orbit so that I would approach her or not.

 

I don't know what to do. I've given her complete space for the past 4-5 months. Focusing on school and being healthy. And I don't know if she has feelings for me again. But I do still want her. There are two weeks left in the semester. Should I ask her out again even though I got rejected a few months ago?

Edited May 1, 2014 by Haydaman712

[Assasda]

Dude, She liked you. You put her on the pedestal, and then she came back to you to see if you were still a wuss.

She was testing you by standing right infront of her to see if you would grovel, and say "Oh you are so beautiful". Then she would barf all over your lap.

 

When a girl is acting like a brat, you treat her like a brat bascially. So if you want to see her again next time ask her "What the hell happened to you for the last 4 months". Dont let up on her.

 

After that , you say, "you come from a place where people just stand infront of someone they know the whole time?. See what she says.

 

Dont "Ask her out" or anything like that.

Let her understand that you are not the wuss, that you were acting like before, and that you have your own life, and you dont need a woman to be complete

[Haydaman712]

Thanks for the advice.

 

So are you recommending that I let her to do something first? And that I do nothing at all?

[Omei]

I think you should pick a different flower and try your hand at her petals instead.

[Assasda]

OP youre not getting it. Just dont be a wuss. Its not if she gets at you first or you get at her first

[Haydaman712]

OP youre not getting it. Just dont be a wuss. Its not if she gets at you first or you get at her first

 

So what do you suggest that I do?

[mutualove]

I don't put up with this kind of behavior.

 

If I were you I'd do nothing.You already have shown your interest in her and in return she doesn't even respond to you or at the very least give some kind of explanation.

 

My advice?Treat her like any other normal person.Nothing special about her.And it's her turn to make a move.

[sagetalk]

I think she likes it that you like her, but this sounds like it is all one sided. Probably more to do with attention then actually romantic feelings. Don't beat yourself up for the rest of your life. Call her and ask her out to coffee or lunch. If she says no, then you will know for certain there was nothing.