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lead on or actual like?


terlaughs

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Hi everyone- I met this guy about 6 weeks ago out in NYC… We met through a friend and hit it off instantaneously, hanging out all night (kissing, but nothing else- I didn’t stay with him although he asked me to). We’ve kept in contact, but didn’t see each other.. (Plans fell through, he canceled on me once)… I also had a death in family and cut off contact for a week or so, as to not get too personal with this guy without ever hanging out with him. I reached back out to him and we met up when I was in the city last week. We had a really great night together and he wound up coming to see me (about an hour and a half away) for an actually date. The chemistry is awesome and our date last weekend was great, too. He spent the night and was pretty pushy/wanted to sleep together.. I wasn’t sure, but wound up giving in.. Unfortunately, he didn’t seem as ready as he would’ve liked to be because the sex was basically a fail. I still had fun, but directly after the unsuccessful attempt on his part he started opening up about past relationships. He also basically said he felt like a jerk for coming out to see me because we didn’t know what “this” was.. (It was a first date). I said I felt something for him and was willing to see it through/happy he came. My friends mentioned he does get a lot of girls and that he was obsessed with the last girl he seriously dated- where he got burned. He apologized profusely about being so pushy and what not. Also saw a text on his phone while he was with me asking if he was in love yet (from a friend regarding our date).. Our mutual connection even told him not to “mess around with family friends” and he said he wasn’t.. and that was to his own male friend. This week he reached out to me once to ask how I am, but not much else. I kept texts light and airy, but am getting no response now. I feel like he’s backing away/kind of used me, but also got the sense that he really was into me and may have his own hesitations.. I understand a guy isn’t going to fall madly in love after a date, and the distance could be an issue, but why go cold on me like that when there is

clear chemistry!? I'm not typically like this.. I am attractive, and confident, not a nag or over the top kind of girl.. He even complemented me on the fact that I have myself together. Any advice?

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'Obsessed with his last serious girlfriend'

He also got pushy and rough with you.

Plus a friend asked if he had fallen in love yet.

 

I actually think he is backing off so as not to appear keen.

 

However, that list above would worry me a lot.

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Had to read this a few times. It kinda sounds like a revenge bootycall gone horribly bad to me. Maybe that's too harsh - but the guy was definitely trying to get the other woman off of his mind. The guy is obviously not over his past GF. I mean, he went 1:30 and couldn't seal the deal? That probably only made matter worse for him.

 

Just speaking from a guy's perspective here, he needs to work his way through an econpack of condoms. So probably he's good bootycall fodder but if you want anything else, i would give him 4 - 6 mos to get his act together emotionally.

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I agree. He did mention this last gf was someone he dated last year and there was someone in between.. so I guess I didn't think I was the rebound persay. He def. scoped me out first.

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