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21 year old nerd never even kissed


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Old 26th January 2014, 2:00 PM   #1
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21 year old nerd never even kissed

I am a 21 year old nerd. But not even your average nerd. If somebody was to set the Guinness Book of World Records for nerdiness, that would be me.The few girls that consider themselves nerds only date muscular nerds. I like logical things like math, technology, and computer science. I love to learn for the sake of it, but through high school and college, it was more about studying for tests and doing homework. Why? Because it’s all about making money, and not about finding your passion in life.

My parents forced me to go to college because they were worried that I would starve to death otherwise. Most students in college did nothing but drink. I eventually caved in and drank a lot, but usually by myself, but decided to give up.

One other thing I like to do is travel. I visited Paris a few years ago and felt like I fit in there more. I am fed up with America, and want to find a girl here that is also fed up with America.

In high school, nobody was my type. In college, I thought the few girls in my engineering classes would be interested in somebody like me, but they also said I was too nerdy. I just want to find one girl that likes me for who I am.

http://www.demandstudiossucks.com/wp...uter-nerd.jpeg That's me lol (metaphorically)

Last edited by atdevel; 26th January 2014 at 2:03 PM..
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:10 PM   #2
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Had a couple of mates in your situation. They did have to wait a fair while, but when they found someone, they REALLY found someone.


Just make yourself the best version of yourself you can be. (I swear I stole that from a film - maybe High Fidelity)


It'll happen when it happens, but always take strides to make yourself attractive. That doesn't mean physically...just work on being fulfilled in yourself and try to put yourself out there, even if it means challenging yourself.
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:19 PM   #3
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Had a couple of mates in your situation. They did have to wait a fair while, but when they found someone, they REALLY found someone.


Just make yourself the best version of yourself you can be. (I swear I stole that from a film - maybe High Fidelity)


It'll happen when it happens, but always take strides to make yourself attractive. That doesn't mean physically...just work on being fulfilled in yourself and try to put yourself out there, even if it means challenging yourself.
This makes me really impatient though because I guess what I really want is a casual sex relationship at this point. I'm really interested in sex and want to try it, but I have to be really good looking or find someone with a similar interest, both of which isn't happening to me.
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:22 PM   #4
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Have you tried internet dating?


How's your social life looking?
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:26 PM   #5
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Have you tried internet dating?


How's your social life looking?
I haven't tried internet dating because I heard you have to be really good-looking if you are a guy to get any responses, and I don't like putting my personal information online.

I don't fit in even with most nerds, regardless of gender. I only have one male friend. But I really thought that the girls in my engineering classes would be interested in me, but that wasn't meant to happen I guess. I wondered if I went to somewhere like MIT then there would be people my type, but they're more preppy nerds than anything else.

Last edited by atdevel; 26th January 2014 at 2:32 PM..
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:34 PM   #6
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You don't have to be great looking, you just have to portray yourself in the best light that you can whilst still being honest.


Practically everything is easier if you are attractive, but that doesn't mean the rest of us give up!


You barely have to put up any personal information at all...and anyone can find that shizz with half a brain anyway, so I wouldn't worry.


After a few dates, you'll start to get into the swing of it, will invest less and feel more comfortable.


Did you make any approaches of socialise with the engineering girls?
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:43 PM   #7
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You don't have to be great looking, you just have to portray yourself in the best light that you can whilst still being honest.


Practically everything is easier if you are attractive, but that doesn't mean the rest of us give up!


You barely have to put up any personal information at all...and anyone can find that shizz with half a brain anyway, so I wouldn't worry.


After a few dates, you'll start to get into the swing of it, will invest less and feel more comfortable.


Did you make any approaches of socialise with the engineering girls?
Yes I did. But like I said, they weren't interested in me. It made me feel really bad.

If I created an online profile, all I would do is talk about how I am nerdy anyway, and that wouldn't impress anyone. I also don't want to put my pic up there.
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:48 PM   #8
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Well, one way or another you're going to have to put yourself out there.


Either pic online or going out to meet people whether that be at hobby groups or bars etc. You tried some nerdy hobby groups? That sounds condescending, but I mean it.


I used to go to LARP, still do battle re-enactment, local folk music acoustic nights...


Dude, just don't go round saying you're nerdy like it's a bad thing. You're profile is a sales document...


"I'm a really nerdy guy who doesn't do so well with women. I like engineering and logical stuff"


Doesn't read nearly as well as...


" >insert engineering in joke< - if you can appreciate the punch line, we might get on! High-flying academic seeks his match. Have you got what it takes?"


Okay, so the latter is kind of crap. But it is all about how you present yourself for better or for worse.


You can't go putting yourself down.
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:48 PM   #9
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honestly stop feeling so sorry for yourself. Women want a man with confidence, not a self pity guy who calls himself a nerd. Be proud of your life and things you have accomplished. Ive had self esteem issues too and have learned this the hard way..


The way people see you, is always a reflection on how you see yourself.
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Old 26th January 2014, 2:50 PM   #10
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What Zoso said.


Also still struggling with self-esteem. Overweight, but still getting out there. Having fun, some hits and some misses.
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Old 26th January 2014, 3:00 PM   #11
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Women want a man with confidence, not a self pity guy who calls himself a nerd.
Maybe you're right, but that's all I've known. I retreated into logical fields such as math and technology because America for me is too illogical. But the people I met through these fields are too illogical for me.

I'm scared that if I become too confident, I will become one of those steroid-using, heavy-drinking fratboys that are fake.
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Old 26th January 2014, 3:22 PM   #12
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No offence intended, but are you serious?


That does not appear to be a very logical conclusion.


Deciding you are not a nerd or embracing the term in a positive way is not going to make you take steroids or even set you upon the path.


So Professor Richard Dawkins is a steroid-honed, frat-boy because he is confident in his assertions?


Work it through in your own mind, mate. It isn't two ends of the spectrum...you can find middle ground.


You ever been somewhere like Comic-con? Never seen so many confident geeks.
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Old 26th January 2014, 3:26 PM   #13
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Maybe you're right, but that's all I've known. I retreated into logical fields such as math and technology because America for me is too illogical. But the people I met through these fields are too illogical for me.
_________
Saying an entire country is illogical, is illogical in of itself.
_________
I'm scared that if I become too confident, I will become one of those steroid-using, heavy-drinking fratboys that are fake.
_______
Really? Thats just self defeating talk right there. You think Bill Gates lacks confidence?
Confidence is attractive in any man, nerds, jocks and any stereotype you wish to list.


If you want a relationship ot just casual sex you need to work on your self esteem and confidence pronto.

Want to think about it in a more "logical" way. You can't solve a mathematical equation by talking about how hard it is. You focus yourself and work on it until you've got the correct answer.

Same with finding a SO, whining about it gets you nowhere, putting yourself out there will give you more real life dating experience, you can apply.when you find a wkman you think is worthy of more than NSA fun.

If a woman isn't interested don't let it take a hit to your self esteem. There is no sjortage of women in this world.

In conclusion you jave two options here:

1. Do nothing and hope to whatever version of your gid is that some random woman scoops you up
Or
2. Be proactive, put yourself out there. Wotk on your confidence and self esteem. Find meetup groups yhat interest you.

Doing nothing usually gets you nothing.
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One good thing about music,
when it hits you you feel no pain.
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Old 26th January 2014, 3:39 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by BlametheIrish View Post
_______
Really? Thats just self defeating talk right there. You think Bill Gates lacks confidence?
Confidence is attractive in any man, nerds, jocks and any stereotype you wish to list.


If you want a relationship ot just casual sex you need to work on your self esteem and confidence pronto.

Want to think about it in a more "logical" way. You can't solve a mathematical equation by talking about how hard it is. You focus yourself and work on it until you've got the correct answer.

Same with finding a SO, whining about it gets you nowhere, putting yourself out there will give you more real life dating experience, you can apply.when you find a wkman you think is worthy of more than NSA fun.

If a woman isn't interested don't let it take a hit to your self esteem. There is no sjortage of women in this world.

In conclusion you jave two options here:

1. Do nothing and hope to whatever version of your gid is that some random woman scoops you up
Or
2. Be proactive, put yourself out there. Wotk on your confidence and self esteem. Find meetup groups yhat interest you.

Doing nothing usually gets you nothing.
Like I said, I picked electrical engineering because I wasn't confident around people. I just wanted to focus on math.

But maybe you're right. As the classes grew harder and more complex, I was afraid to tackle the new challenges, so even though I graduated as an engineer, I'm not sure if that's what I want to do.

Problem is, I don't know where to begin my search. I would prefer not online, and I'm worried that as like you said, I wouldn't be able to "focus and work on it". I would end up just talking about it. But you saw my problem there.
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Old 26th January 2014, 3:41 PM   #15
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Any hobbies?
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