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How to interpret mixed signals


swazzzz

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So I had met this girl at a club last month, where we exchanged phone numbers and had a drink together. The next day I had to leave the country for work so I didn't have any interaction with her for couple of weeks. After I get back, I send her a text and we chat via texts for some time. Eventually we decide to meet Saturday for drinks around 8 pm. We share a bottle of wine and get talking to one another. We were there till about 1130 pm so you can tell that we had a good date. We hit it off, had great rapport and shared good conversation. After drinks, I peck her on her cheek when we are waiting at the valet and wish her good night. I text her after an hour saying that I had a good night and that we should do it again. She replies in the affirmative as well.

 

I don't text for a couple of days and then I texted her and set up time and place for our second date. Now, let me be clear here. We just agree to meet up over dinner and drinks, the term "date" is never mentioned but its an assumption, I am assuming :). Anyway, due to unforeseen circumstances, I push back our meeting by an hour to which she readily agreed. But I goofed up by being late for that as well, simply because I had one drink too many at my friend's place before I went to meet her, which took up time. I called her to say that I will be 15 minutes late to which she got pissed and said that she is driving back home and canceling the plan. I apologized and calmed her down and eventually met her at the designated place. We had Italian food with good wine and we shared a good time for a good 2 hours. We talk great and we are comfortable with each other. Doesn't seem like any topic is off limits...yet. Later I walk back to her car and peck her on the cheek again. But when I moved in for the peck, she briefly turned her lips towards me, almost like she expected me to kiss her. But she quickly moved her lips away and I pecked her on her cheek.

 

After the 2nd date, I texted her the next day asking how are you and stuff to which I get no response. I wait for a few days and then I call her and she picks up and we talk about regular stuff, just catching up. We decide to meet the weekend but didn't confirm when. Well, come the weekend and I text her and fix up a place and time to meet. This was to be our 3rd date. She was looking stunning. We shared a few drinks at a bar on the 80th floor of a hotel with great views of the marina. Then we went to a restaurant where I had made prior reservations. Food was great and as usual we had great conversation and rapport. Overall dinner went great. Then we went to a club in the same hotel, where we stood by the bar, sipping on our drinks and watching other people make a fool of themselves while dancing drunk. We left the place around 3 am. Again, at the valet, I gave her a good kiss on her cheek and then kissed her extremely close to her lips but not smack on them. She texted me once she got home saying that she had a great time. I replied saying the same.

 

Now my questions are: any third date rule that I should have followed? I really wanted to kiss her but didn't know the right time to do it. The entire evening was fantastic, it went really really well. But there are times when I get mixed signals for her. Like the times I have texted her and not got replies. The times I have called her and she hasn't answered. I am not the type of guy who would question a girl if she doesn't respond to me. But she has said this to me that she has her mood swings where she doesn't feel like talking to anyone. It is not personal, it is just the way she is. Fair enough.

 

I would really like it if all you folks could share your opinions with me on this topic. How do you think I am doing? What should be my next step? 3 dates, does that mean we are exclusive now? Do I have the right to do certain things now? Please please do share your opinions.

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Yes I am newly back in to the dating scene. I had a breakup a few months ago so didn't go out on dates with new women for quite a while.

 

My goal here is to look for a relationship. Get to know her better, do some light flirting to show that I am interested in being more than friends, get intimate. Am just not sure how these things progress.

 

What do you mean by flying the crazy flag?

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Three dates with nary a kiss? You're totally not exclusive. You're really not exclusive until you talk about being exclusive.

 

You've had three fun dates. What do you want? Do you want something more? Then grab that bull by the horns! Don't wait until the end of the night to kiss - just go in for the kiss!!!!!!!

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Well I don't really want to talk about it yet. I am still learning to pick up on signals which I figured am quite bad at. Any particular ones I should look out for?

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If you go in for a peck and don't catch crap for it and she agrees to meet you again, you gotta kiss the next time. She is totally down for it. There is not need for you to progress down her face eventually getting to her lips. If you want clear signals from girls then you have to give her your clear signals as well. Escalate the attraction by being more aggressive during the date. You've got to see how far you can get with her. If she has any problems you will be able to tell. She is reacting to your signals which are ambiguous as well. Pecks on the cheek are a "I like you but I'm not sure" or a "I'm not brave enough to go in for the real kiss". Don't be afraid of ruining your chances. You can't be scared. Just go for it, if she likes you she will receive the kiss. You find out sooner that way anyways.

 

As far as things to look for. How does she react to physical touching. What if you grab her hand? does she jerk back? What if you get your face really close to hes while saying something, does she move back slightly or stay still. Don't be afraid of kiss rejection, if you like the girl you have to go for it. She knows you like her, she isn't stupid. If she rejects you by turning her face, just laugh it off and peace out.

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Well it has been almost 6 days since we last went out. Like I said before, it was a great date (at least from my perspective) and we texted each other once we got home saying that we had a great night. That was Friday. I waited a couple of days to contact her again and sent her a generic text on Monday night. No reply to that. It is now Wednesday and I am contemplating whether or not to call her later today or not. That is the case here actually. She is pretty bad at keeping in touch but when the weekend arrives, she answers the texts about me asking her out and we meet at some place. But during the week contacts are hardly responded to. Isn't this mixed signals of some sort? What does this or could this mean?

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