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not sure how to make this work


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I am 23 and have been dating my boyfriend for 3.5 years. He is 25. In the beginning of our relationship about 3 months in, I got really wasted at a party and cheated on him, unintentionally. I immediately told him the next day and we broke up.

I tried very hard to get him back. For a while I let him treat me like **** and we continued to have sexual relations for about 5 months. Finally he said he would take me back and then after 3 months we moved in with each other. It's been a few years now and he is still super jealous, always thinking im lieing and gets mad tht i have male friends at college. (he doesnt go to college, i commute over an hour away because he refused to move there) I am seeking counseling for myself because I am depressed and unhappy. He refuses to come with me, and constantly asks me if I'm cheating because he thinks I'm hiding something. I don't want to be with him anymore if he continues to hold this over my head. When I try to discuss it with him, he always says getting ****ed up at a party is no excuse and he doesn't know why I would do something like that to him. I agree but I honestly did not mean to do it and have been feeling like **** over this.

I don't know how to fix this anymore without just completely breaking up. It's been 3.5 years invested and I can't take much more. I'm trying to forgive myself but his jealousy and insecurity isn't helping and he won't try to fix it himself. I want to make this work but I don't know what to do anymore.

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Sorry, but there is no such thing as cheating "unintentionally". He is never going to let this go. Do the both of you a favor and end it. It's already gone on too long. Continue to seek help for yourself.

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