Do you ever find you only pursue girls with broken families or other serious issues?

[Emissary]

You know, I take my time with dating, though I flirt with a lot of girls, I am very selective in which ones I would ever pursue. For one, I really like to get to know them a bit before making any sort of move. You would think this is a good way of making sure you end up with a nice and normal girl, but it isn't seeming that way now.

 

I'm noticing a disturbing trend in all the girls I've taken seriously since I registered on this site in 2010 when I actually started entering the dating scene seriously.

 

Girl #1: Parents divorced, step-father shot himself with her present as a child, estranged with mother. Also turned out to be a bit of a whore, lots and lots of STIs, luckily I didn't end up getting a piece of that pie lol.

 

Girl #2: Parents divorced, estranged from mother and sleeps with married men.

 

Girl #3: Father in prison, estranged from mother, lived with aunt but got kicked out eventually, can't remember why. She had a bit of a happy ending in which she reconnected with her mom at least.

 

Girl #4: Korean girl, was kicked out of her home for saying the S word, mother openly admits she regrets the girl's birth.

 

Girl #5: Probably the most normal person on the list in terms of family life, no issues as far as I could tell. She had some pretty severe emotional issues though, was kind of bipolar.

 

Girl #6: Parents divorced, also estranged from mother. She had severe emotional issues as well, she told me that I was the only guy to ever take her on an actual date. Offered to be friends with benefits, but I decided not to pursue that option.

 

Girl #7: Lucky number seven. Her parents are divorced, her mom is incapable of supporting her for an unspecified reason, her dad is an alcoholic and has hit her several times in the past. She's still in high school and working only part-time, but she moved into an apartment with her friend(male) who promptly tried to rape her for not being friends with benefits with him, after this he locked her out and she lives completely alone.

 

I guess I have some sort of protective male instinct, find a woman in distress and make her life whole again. I guess that's how I really felt towards them all when I began to understand their situations, I wanted to be the man who makes everything alright in their life.

 

Oddly enough, Girl #7, the one I'm currently in the early stages of entering a relationship with, I think I have a better chance of making this work than with any of the others, she at least seems open to me becoming a part of her life.

[todreaminblue]

you dont have to be that man who makes everything all right, most people once they hit dating and relationship stages, have a past and not all that happens in a relationship is good including family......issues and experiences can give a capacity to grow, that if you didnt experience them , wouldnt make you the person or person they are today....

 

you dont have to fix broken people, you just have to accept them for who they are, and love them regardless,regardless to where they have been you want to move forward with them and share their dreams and aspirations of a loving and rewarding life in their future, white knighting soemone is an honorable and selfless thing to do .......but....relationships are meant to be about two peopel not one getting all the attention and the other one being selfless...i am a female version......have had a relationship where i white knighted someone and that relationship lasted three years....you cant change people, you can be there for them and help them, ultimately what they do is not up to you.....the best relationship you can hope for is someone who you truly love and truly loves you back regardless of a past.....and your eyes must be ahead, it does no good to keep looking back...i wish you the best and i hope that your relationship you have now grows and becomes rewarding and eyes forward...that felt like i wrote a post to myself....;0).....good luck..deb