hellohi Posted February 7, 2013 Share Posted February 7, 2013 there is this girl who my gf openly dislikes, yet she keeps texting me to hang out.. we have been friends forever and we really are just good friends. I keep avoiding a hangout and try to maintain a friendship but its pretty tough. what do i do? i hate being mean to a genuine friend, but my girlfriend is right to be upset if i were to hang out with her since i would hate if she ever hung out with another guy. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted February 7, 2013 Share Posted February 7, 2013 How long have you been with your GF? How long have you known this other girl? If your GF hangs out with other guys she hardly knows, that would be one thing, but if your GF had a long-time male friend, how would you feel about it then? Link to post Share on other sites
sabre80 Posted February 7, 2013 Share Posted February 7, 2013 If you are uncomfortable about a situation enough to make a post on a forum about then chances are it is probably not a good idea. You have stated if the roles were reversed you would not be happy. Therefore it is not unreasonable to assume you continuing forward will make your girlfriend unhappy. You are left with the decision. Is your friend more important to your life or your girlfriend? Though some can maintain both, your girlfriend has expressed a dislike about this friend. Continuing forward would be crossing a clearly defined boundary, thus damaging trust. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hellohi Posted February 7, 2013 Author Share Posted February 7, 2013 ive been with my gf for 4 years, and my other friend I've known for the past 7... the only reason my gf doesnt like her is that she's really pretty... It also feels weird telling my friend we can't talk anymore because really, there s no risk between us we are truly great friends... and i dont know how id feel if she knew someone for that long and stil hung out with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Fondue Posted February 7, 2013 Share Posted February 7, 2013 If you have been dating your GF for 4 years, I'm sure this speaks volumes of your fidelity and commitment to one another. If after 4 years she still tries to manipulate whom you see and whom you don't (Platonic friends), then I think there is more to this problem than just that. But at the same time, you DID mention that you would be upset if she was to hang out with another dude, so I dunno what is fair anymore. Would you be upset if she wanted to hangout with a guy she already knew for 7 years? Personally, I wouldn't care at all, and I would expect that she didn't either. Then again, I'm much more open than most people. Link to post Share on other sites
sabre80 Posted February 7, 2013 Share Posted February 7, 2013 ive been with my gf for 4 years, and my other friend I've known for the past 7... the only reason my gf doesnt like her is that she's really pretty... It also feels weird telling my friend we can't talk anymore because really, there s no risk between us we are truly great friends... and i dont know how id feel if she knew someone for that long and stil hung out with him. Talking to your friend and hanging out one on one are two different things. If you have been dating your GF for 4 years, I'm sure this speaks volumes of your fidelity and commitment to one another. If after 4 years she still tries to manipulate whom you see and whom you don't (Platonic friends), then I think there is more to this problem than just that. But at the same time, you DID mention that you would be upset if she was to hang out with another dude, so I dunno what is fair anymore. Would you be upset if she wanted to hangout with a guy she already knew for 7 years? Personally, I wouldn't care at all, and I would expect that she didn't either. Then again, I'm much more open than most people. Not true. 4 years is nothing. I was married 9 years. She was loyal for 7 of them it was the last one where she became a craigslist slut. Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted February 7, 2013 Share Posted February 7, 2013 If you would be upset if your girlfriend were to hang out with a guy, it would be very hypocritical of you to hang out with this girl. I would just keep distancing yourself from her, unless your GF would be open to joining her and another guy on a double date or something. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hellohi Posted February 8, 2013 Author Share Posted February 8, 2013 also this came out wrong, my gf never said i wasnt allowed to hang out with this girl. i just know she would feel upset. Link to post Share on other sites
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