What should I read into this? Should I make another move?

[MashedPotatoes]

A little rundown of my current situation. Met girl at a coffee shop. Established rapport and asked her out a few weeks later in person after she showed several indicators of interest. She responded by saying "I'm not seeing anyone now, but there's a reason why I'm not dating. But let's hang out, no pressure..." This vague response kind of threw me off, but I figured why not and give it a chance. First couple of "hang outs" were at my place. Because of the whole "hang out, no pressure" I didn't really make any sort of move, although in hindsight, I really should have. After our first few "pseudo dates" she told me "I really enjoy your company, but I don't see this going anywhere. I'd still love to hang out as friends though..." I thought this was an awkward thing to say, since I thought we were just "hanging out" to begin with. Now, I have my theory of why she said that. Basically, I misinterpreted what she meant when she said "hang out, no pressure" which led me to somewhat restrict myself around her by not making any sort of move which in turn led her to believe that I was ok just being friends with her which in turn made her say "I don't see this going anywhere."

 

Anyways, I do genuinely enjoy her company and figured there's no harm in having an attractive female friend...just improves my social status right? haha. So, it's been a year since I initially asked her out and we typically hang out about twice a month, always one to one. Now, up until recently, I've been the one to suggest meeting up. We exchange texts frequently (about every other day on average) which she initiates about 50% of the time. During the past couple weeks, I've noticed that she's been initiating a whole lot more. I've also noticed that she's been sending me texts asking questions that she could easily find the answers to. She sent me a text LATE Saturday night asking how the wedding I went to was. Typically, when texting, we simply exchange witty/flirty banter back and forth, but recently she's been asking to hang out more often...ie dinner, watch tv/movie at my place...

 

During our most recent "date" we went to a coffee shop and had dinner afterwards at a sushi place. At the coffee shop, a gentleman on his laptop turned to us and asked if we were married. I kind of laughed and said no. The guy gave a perplexed look then asked if we were dating. I kind of laughed again and asked the guy why he thought we were married or dating. He responded by saying something to the effect of "I'm sorry, but I couldn't help to eavesdrop and I was watching you guys for the past few minutes interacting...you guys just looked adorable..." Now, after the dude on the laptop said what he said, I was kind of curious to see how the girl would react. If she had absolutely no interest in me romantically, one would think she would have said something like "haha...no we're just friends, blah blah...." Instead, it kind of seemed that she got a little nervous and she said something, in a somewhat hesitant way, "oh, he just came by to get coffee with me..." Anyways, we had a great time at dinner afterwards.

 

I don't know...just want to see what all you loveshack nerds think about my situation.

 

Thanks!

[MashedPotatoes]

love to get some more opinions...thoughts?

[Brit]

You have to make a move or simply ask to get a truthful answer. Does not sound like their is much chemistry.

[todreaminblue]

A little rundown of my current situation. Met girl at a coffee shop. Established rapport and asked her out a few weeks later in person after she showed several indicators of interest. She responded by saying "I'm not seeing anyone now, but there's a reason why I'm not dating. But let's hang out, no pressure..." This vague response kind of threw me off, but I figured why not and give it a chance. First couple of "hang outs" were at my place. Because of the whole "hang out, no pressure" I didn't really make any sort of move, although in hindsight, I really should have. After our first few "pseudo dates" she told me "I really enjoy your company, but I don't see this going anywhere. I'd still love to hang out as friends though..." I thought this was an awkward thing to say, since I thought we were just "hanging out" to begin with. Now, I have my theory of why she said that. Basically, I misinterpreted what she meant when she said "hang out, no pressure" which led me to somewhat restrict myself around her by not making any sort of move which in turn led her to believe that I was ok just being friends with her which in turn made her say "I don't see this going anywhere."

 

Anyways, I do genuinely enjoy her company and figured there's no harm in having an attractive female friend...just improves my social status right? haha. So, it's been a year since I initially asked her out and we typically hang out about twice a month, always one to one. Now, up until recently, I've been the one to suggest meeting up. We exchange texts frequently (about every other day on average) which she initiates about 50% of the time. During the past couple weeks, I've noticed that she's been initiating a whole lot more. I've also noticed that she's been sending me texts asking questions that she could easily find the answers to. She sent me a text LATE Saturday night asking how the wedding I went to was. Typically, when texting, we simply exchange witty/flirty banter back and forth, but recently she's been asking to hang out more often...ie dinner, watch tv/movie at my place...

 

During our most recent "date" we went to a coffee shop and had dinner afterwards at a sushi place. At the coffee shop, a gentleman on his laptop turned to us and asked if we were married. I kind of laughed and said no. The guy gave a perplexed look then asked if we were dating. I kind of laughed again and asked the guy why he thought we were married or dating. He responded by saying something to the effect of "I'm sorry, but I couldn't help to eavesdrop and I was watching you guys for the past few minutes interacting...you guys just looked adorable..." Now, after the dude on the laptop said what he said, I was kind of curious to see how the girl would react. If she had absolutely no interest in me romantically, one would think she would have said something like "haha...no we're just friends, blah blah...." Instead, it kind of seemed that she got a little nervous and she said something, in a somewhat hesitant way, "oh, he just came by to get coffee with me..." Anyways, we had a great time at dinner afterwards.

 

I don't know...just want to see what all you loveshack nerds think about my situation.

 

Thanks!

 

 

im not a nerd i just play with tree sap for fun...ok im a nerd.....i think the nervousness is a good indicator she likes you.......run with it.....run with that ball attach tree sap so it sticks to your hand.....cheat football i call it.....she got nervous because you laughed at th eguys comment thats a guesstimate......notice she didnt back your statement up......the random texts for no apparent reason .......the banter you have goign the mor efrequent texts all good indicators....make yoru move sunshine...best wishes....try sticking to her with tree sap.....smilin...I love tree sap its....smells fresh like summer pines near the ocean....sigh....toodles....deb

[weee111]

When she comes over to watch tv or whatever does she sit next you? Sit on the same couch as her and see what her body language is. Does she lean away or in? Is she uncomfortable with you being next to her? Say you are cold, grab a blanket, and ask if she wants to share. If that's fine you can probably cuddle with her. If cuddling works, play with her hair or rub her arm or something. Like someone else said, feel her out and see how far you can push it. Stop at any resistance...go slowly and proceed with caution. I'd highly recommend that you do NOT just blurt out that you have feelings for her at this stage...that is just going to make things awkward and possibly scare her away.