analyzer Posted November 25, 2012 Share Posted November 25, 2012 So I went to the bar wednesday about 30 minutes before close. Met a nice girl there, she invited me to a party the next day (thanksgiving night). I went and had a really good time, and she ended up coming home and staying the night with me. I had to drive her back to her car that morning (friday), she seemed a little quiet, but it was probably due to lack of sleep and being hungover. I texted her today about 6 hours ago, and haven't heard back. I broke up with my long term girlfriend of 5 years about 5 months ago, and this is the first girl i've been able to do anything with outside the bar. I'm 24 fwiw. Basically, i'm wondering if this was a one night type thing, and if not, should i text\call her again? I feel like her not replying is a very strong hint that she doesn't want to see me again? Clearly my girl hunting skills are sub par at best, so i'd like to continue seeing this girl i met. I am unsure how to continue from here. Advice and comments are appreciated! Link to post Share on other sites
Ninjainpajamas Posted November 25, 2012 Share Posted November 25, 2012 She could have been using you to fill in void emotionally, and once she did the deed she may not have been happy about herself, how she might have come off or that it didn't really resolve anything...because that is highly suspicious and a bit weird to spend a day with someone you just met at a bar on thanksgiving night unless it just kinda rolled out that way...but regardless I think there was more to it even if that assessment is wrong. It seems like she chose you, you didn't her, so in that regard I don't think your hunting skills are in question here, she already made her mind up to sleep with you from the get go. You got back to her a little quick, you should have probably waited for her to contact you or waiting a little bit longer, just so she can cool down and rehash what had happened, because it doesn't seem like you guys were super close and talking about things, just enjoying the moment. In which when you get out on the field of dating again it can be confusing, because things aren't always what they appear to be, you're kind of in vulnerability and emotional mode...5 months isn't a long time for a 5 year relationship, you're definitely going to experience some residual emotions there. So just take it a day at a time, don't let yourself get all wrapped up emotionally and mentally, just lay back and focus on some other things, if she wants to get back to you she will, if not just let it go. I know it'll be tempting to get back to her, especially in light of all that has happened and felt was happening but chances are you're both in the same place emotionally and mentally and that's why it worked out when it did. I'm not saying you're an emotional wreck or anything, but there is definitely a heightened level of senses and anticipation, but this could have definitely just been a test run...don't let it get to you too much and over analyze it, just let it be what it's going to be without trying to manipulate the situation or seek answers or anything like that, let it sink in. IMO this sounds like a short fling type situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author analyzer Posted November 25, 2012 Author Share Posted November 25, 2012 Thanks for your reply, very insightful. I feel like i overthink just about everything, so getting thoughts out on a forum is therapeutic for me. I think the thanksgiving thing wasn't all that unordinary, we still both hung out with our families all day and did that whole thing. My original text today was "Hey what's up? We still need to have a mariokart battle royale!" Anyways, she replied an hour ago and said "Hey! haha hell yeah it's on!" and i said "I kick ass you have no chance! You should come over tonight, i'll be home around 10." I haven't heard back again.. Too forward? How come i worry and fret about every little thing, it can't be healthy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author analyzer Posted November 25, 2012 Author Share Posted November 25, 2012 Final update: Rejected. lol Thanks for reading Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted November 25, 2012 Share Posted November 25, 2012 Final update: Rejected. lol Thanks for reading She was interested until you suggested what sounded like a booty call. I think you should have made a proper date for the next day or day after. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ninjainpajamas Posted November 25, 2012 Share Posted November 25, 2012 Dude, I just told you to take it easy and you put your foot in your butt fast! Ah well, honestly I think it's for the best, you sound far from ready, overzealous and acting a bit immature. Again...slow it down tiger, recollect those marbles and go in holding a full deck, you've got to take things slower or you're going to keep pushing too hard. Link to post Share on other sites
Author analyzer Posted November 25, 2012 Author Share Posted November 25, 2012 Yeah, i guess setting the time a little farther out is a little more appropriate. It totally comes across as booty call, but she had expressed interest in mariokart and I thought it would be a fun activity :\ Link to post Share on other sites
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