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is this reasonable?


mercedesgirl

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mercedesgirl

would it be reasonable for me to ask my boyfriend of 4 months why he finished with his last girlfriend?

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What is context of asking a question like this? Is there an absolute reason you need to know why things didn't work out? Or are you just curious?

 

There's nothing wrong with asking questions such as these. However, it may be a sensitive issue with him. I would say tread lightly.

 

Is there any other information you can provide?

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mercedesgirl

the reasoning behind my question is that he lived with his girlfriend for 3 years. last year he said they ended their relationship, but continued to live in the same house. I wanted to know what made them decide to end te relationship?

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would it be reasonable for me to ask my boyfriend of 4 months why he finished with his last girlfriend?

'What did you learn from your last relationship?'

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  • 2 weeks later...
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speaking to my OH tonite about his 'ex' being his 'friend' on Facebook and I told him that it bothered me that she was on there. He said that he would delete her if I wanted him to, I said yes I did want him to.

 

I feel good for talking to him about it, but not sure if I've ruined our relationship because of it. Do you think I was wrong in agreeing for him to delete her, but he did ask me?

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I think it's weirdly insecure and uncool to control a partner's communication with an ex. Especially with something as innocuous as facebook. But hey, it's also pretty common...

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I think it's weirdly insecure and uncool to control a partner's communication with an ex. Especially with something as innocuous as facebook. But hey, it's also pretty common...

 

I agree; it's a bit strange, and I wouldn't take it very well unless we were in a very committed relationship.

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would it be reasonable for me to ask my boyfriend of 4 months why he finished with his last girlfriend?

 

In my opinion, yes. You could ask him what went wrong in his last relationship and that the reason you're asking is that you don't want to make the same mistake with him in your current relationship.

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Don't make a big thing of it or anything, but yes, speaking about lessons learned/what went wrong in previous relationships is reasonable at that stage.

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thanks for your replies. I suppose it is because Im a bit insecure, consdiering that he said he cant stand her and doesnt want anything to do with her!!!!!! anyways, he still hasnt deleted her from his 'friend' list, do I assume he's not going to now!

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