frenchgirl Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Hi all, I'm in a really difficult situation and need your input on how to best deal with this. About a month ago, my very best friend (who moved out about a year ago) was in town and confessed to having "very deep" feelings for me. Unfortunately, I am not attracted to him and kindly explained to him that it wouldn't be possible. He was really nice about it and there was no drama at all. Fast forward to this week, I hear he's in town to see his mother and would like to get together for a cup of coffee. He eventually mentions that his mom is actually out of town and that he made the trip just to see me. I now feel like I have to reject him again. Am I jumping to conclusions or do you agree I should have another talk with him? Thanks for your input Link to post Share on other sites
ConflictedGuy27 Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 how long have you two been "best friends?" Link to post Share on other sites
Author frenchgirl Posted December 30, 2010 Author Share Posted December 30, 2010 how long have you two been "best friends?" I would say over three years. Link to post Share on other sites
ConflictedGuy27 Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 these feelings he has won't necessarily vanish in the short term; so the status quo is sort of tainted. the lying to get you out thing... hmm. I can see emotion/rejection leading one to do something foolish. bottom line here is he's wanted into your pants for the past three years. unless he finds another woman and falls hard for her, it's tough to imagine going back to the naievety of yesterday -- the cat's out of the bag. what is it that you'd like to happen? Link to post Share on other sites
Author frenchgirl Posted December 30, 2010 Author Share Posted December 30, 2010 Like you said, I kind of hope he'll find a girlfriend and move on. We get along really well and it would be a shame for us to break the friendship because of this. I feel so confused! Link to post Share on other sites
ConflictedGuy27 Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Like you said, I kind of hope he'll find a girlfriend and move on. We get along really well and it would be a shame for us to break the friendship because of this. I feel so confused! ironically, about the same time you began your thread, another poster (from the guy liking the girl's perspective) started a relevant thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t258831/ take a look. I think you two may be able to gain some helpful insight from each other. I linked him to your thread, too. Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 What about him do you find unattractive? Link to post Share on other sites
OceanGirl Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 What do you get out of making up s%it like this? Link to post Share on other sites
DuskCrush Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Hmmm...I would make an excuse and not see him. See--> you already had the talk with him and he doesn't want to get it. Just be friendly and have coffee if you want to but don't bother to bring anything up. He's not ready to accept the truth so it doesn't matter...even if you give him a talk he'll still think he has hope. Just let time kill the hope. Still--if you want to send out a clear message or total disinterest...don't have coffee...just avoid him. I know it's mean but it's better than having a conversation. Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 ironically, about the same time you began your thread, another poster (from the guy liking the girl's perspective) started a relevant thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t258831/ take a look. I think you two may be able to gain some helpful insight from each other. I linked him to your thread, too. Strange. These kind of coincidences happen a lot with this poster http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=2957104&highlight=posters#post2957104 Link to post Share on other sites
ConflictedGuy27 Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Strange. These kind of coincidences happen a lot with this poster http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=2957104&highlight=posters#post2957104 hilarious! so that other thread, started by "Bunklife", may very well be this same, "Frenchgirl" character... talk about bored. Link to post Share on other sites
Crazy Magnet Posted December 31, 2010 Share Posted December 31, 2010 I like it when people start replying to themselves. It makes me feel normal. If you are real (which I think not) go find a new "best friend" Link to post Share on other sites
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