eerie_reverie Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 (edited) In my peer group, this is the way most relationships seem to begin. You go out with your friends to some bar, where you flirt with someone's roommate or brother. Everyone goes back to someone's apartment, and you make out on the couch before passing out in his bed. I don't know of any current relationships that began with a date BEFORE the first kiss. But I'm uncomfortable getting sexual without some level of emotional intimacy, before knowing what the other person is looking for. Don't get me wrong, I have participated in my fair share of drunken hookups, and have even gotten an R out of the deal. But I have come to realize that more often than not, these encounters make me feel like crap the next day, so I just don't do it anymore. I go out a fair bit, but I focus on friendships. I would like a serious relationship but I guess I'm hoping it works out for me the old-fashioned way. My friends say my attitude is self-defeatist, that this is not how people operate anymore; that I'm shooting myself in the foot by playing so hard to get. I'm not going to change my stance, but I was wondering how y'all operate. Especially for those who don't do online dating, how do you end up in an R? FYI, I'm 24 years old. Also, I realize people's definition of the term "hook up" vary, but I don't mean it to necessarily include full-blown banging. Edited October 17, 2010 by eerie_reverie Link to post Share on other sites
Mad Max Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 I'm against hookups myself. I prefer to date someone and let it progress into a relationship. I absolutely refuse to have sex with anyone until we're exclusive and we both have been tested for STDs. Link to post Share on other sites
Clep Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 I couldn't imagine hooking up with someone to find out in a week they aren't the one for me. At that rate I could be hooking up with a great deal of people and I'm not sure where my self respect could stay intact in that type of a situation. I prefer to get to know someone and find out if they are probably the one for me before going further than a kiss. I would also want them to trust me if they are the one. Trust in the area of the opposite sex would be difficult to gain if I was the type to hook up with just anyone I would think. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 I don't know of any current relationships that began with a date BEFORE the first kiss. Is that how things are done these days? I'm assuming that alcohol was involved in every encounter. Link to post Share on other sites
Author eerie_reverie Posted October 17, 2010 Author Share Posted October 17, 2010 Is that how things are done these days? I'm assuming that alcohol was involved in every encounter. I'm guessing yes, alcohol was involved, but most of the people I know, know how to moderate, so I doubt any of them were totally wasted. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 That was pretty much how my social circle dated prior to graduating law school (i.e., prior to 25, when no one really cared to be in a "real" relationship anyway). After that, never again. Link to post Share on other sites
Knittress Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 No. Believe me, I wish I could sometimes. I just like my heart where it is - beating and in my chest. I try to keep an open mind though, so who knows, someday... Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 Once. Never again. Link to post Share on other sites
tigressA Posted October 17, 2010 Share Posted October 17, 2010 I hook up while out on dates. Link to post Share on other sites
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