ka_raidergurl Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 Well, this is my first post here, and I'm hoping to get some good advice : ) About a week ago, I basically told my b/f of 3 months that I didn't think that I could ever love anyone else...In other words, I know for a fact that I could spend the rest of my life with him (what a cliche, I know...lol) (He's also left for college about a week ago)...But anyway, I think that I might have scared him a bit. His reply was, "Well, they say that you always feel like you'll marry the first person you date, but that's usually not the way it turns out." Or something to that extent. This really upset me, especially because I'm confused on what he was trying to say! I asked him, "Sorry...I guess you're saying that it's a bad thing for me to think." And he replied with, "No. It's a good thing." Which of course, confused me even more. I hope I haven't confused anyone ELSE with all of this, but I just really need someone's opinion on this. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Ryan Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 Is this the longest relationship you've ever had? He gave you not only his response, but a very accurate one. He'd be doing you a favor to make you aware of the "fairy tale" syndrome that almost everyone falls into with their first serious relationship. He knows about this...and now he knows that you're doing it. I don't think this means the end of your relationship right now, but he is telling you the very real truth of relationships: they end. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ka_raidergurl Posted August 25, 2003 Author Share Posted August 25, 2003 Yes this is my first relationship EVER...and his too... I'm just really insecure about things and I get jealous VERY easily, and I think that lately I've been upsetting him because he doesn't think I trust him...even though I really do. Maybe we just need to talk about things a little more. Thanks so much for your advice...it's pretty much what I expected he meant. : ) Link to post Share on other sites
Ryan Posted August 25, 2003 Share Posted August 25, 2003 I'm just really insecure about things and I get jealous VERY easily That's VERY common for first relationships. This is the time you go through that phase and grow from it. But...you're in it right now, so there's not much you can do. I'll be straight with you - you aren't going to marry this guy. This relationship will end. In fact, you're going to have a few more than come and go as well. The value is that, each time, you learn more about yourself and how to have a better NEXT relationship. Some people fail to realize this process is vital. They cling to a first relationship and never give themselves time and opportunity to develop. Something as complex and confusing as love is not going to be understood on the first try. Link to post Share on other sites
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