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Is sharing food an intimate/romantic gesture?


guy.lepage

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I went out for lunch with a few people from work.

 

Two of my colleagues, both married but not to each other, were sharing food and essentially eating in each other's plate. She'd cut him a little piece of meat and he'd put some of his veggies in her plate.

 

Sharing food is something that I typically same for my SO but I'd be interested to hear what you think.

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I do it with friends too though it's not my favourite as I like my food. It is a little intimate but it isn't something I reserve for my SO

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I do it with friends too though it's not my favourite as I like my food. It is a little intimate but it isn't something I reserve for my SO

 

Do you do it with friends of opposite sex? Close friends only?

 

The scene I saw were from two people who (supposedly) just work together.

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In Korea, many meals are shared meals. So, I share food with anyone I'd eat with. It kind of becomes natural even in "Western" restaurants where you order plates.

 

I was always a food-sharer though. I would readily share food with friends, family. . . just about anyone I was meeting socially, if it seemed acceptable. I'd never grab food off of someone else's plate, other than maybe an SO or my Mom. But sharing doesn't seem odd to me. I like to share.

 

If they were feeding each other, I'd find that intimate. But just setting it on the plate/taking it off doesn't seem it at all. My male friends and I, here and in America, share food. Believe I've shared food with co-workers in both countries too.

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Do you do it with friends of opposite sex? Close friends only?

 

The scene I saw were from two people who (supposedly) just work together.

 

opposite sex or same sex, doesn't matter. when I have curry with my friends, we share some of the dishes especially those we have not tried before.

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If my girl friend started sharing food (not korean/asian family style where everything is in the center like zengirl assumes)

 

Everything is not actually in the center, depending on the kind of meal it is. Many times you grab food off a plate that is literally in front of a person. You never share rice, though. :) That would be "weird". (Things with rice mixed in sometimes though.) Don't ask me why. I just follow the rules.

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When eating Asian, Indian, tapas, etc, sharing is mandatory. I've been to many of those dinners and yes people do share -- but never from their personal plates.

 

I am referring to the typical North American setting, where they were both getting excited about their personal plates and cut a piece to share, and even picked directly from the other person's plate.

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what the original poster describes is a more intimate act.

 

Two of my colleagues, both married but not to each other, were sharing food and essentially eating in each other's plate. She'd cut him a little piece of meat and he'd put some of his veggies in her plate.

 

obviously they have a complete understanding that things between THEM are shared and open to the other. this trails the agreement (whether spoken or not) that they share an understanding that what one has - the other is allowed to have some of what they have.

 

it shows they have more than a business relationship. that goes without saying.

 

now, a friend of mine who is married - was always in the habit of trying to "feed" me his food - whether his wife was present or not. this always confused me - until someone pointed out how much he enjoyed watching my mouth take his food in. that hit home how inappropriate it was. when i watched his eyes watching my mouth as he gave me a "bite" it was obvious only then - that he had other motives.

 

to share a meal together is an intimate act in itself. to share the food even more so. what was their body language telling you while you ate together?

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When eating Asian, Indian, tapas, etc, sharing is mandatory. I've been to many of those dinners and yes people do share -- but never from their personal plates.

 

I am referring to the typical North American setting, where they were both getting excited about their personal plates and cut a piece to share, and even picked directly from the other person's plate.

 

they are more intimate than they might admit. what do they portray their relationship with each other to be? i do this with family and close friends... but never someone in a business setting.

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Some cultures just share food a lot. Even some americans get in the habit of just offering up stuff on their plate they don't want and asking to try things on other peoples plates.

 

I think its gross. When I was in the middle east I had to eat under barbaric food sharing conditions... the toilets were insane.....

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I went out for lunch with a few people from work.

 

Two of my colleagues, both married but not to each other, were sharing food and essentially eating in each other's plate. She'd cut him a little piece of meat and he'd put some of his veggies in her plate.

 

Sharing food is something that I typically same for my SO but I'd be interested to hear what you think.

 

This happened to me a few months ago with a female colleague and I too would like to know other peoples opinions on this.

 

I started a new job a few months previous and noticed this really hot girl, but she worked in a different department. We used to pass by in the corridors and sometimes I would notice her on the commute to/from work.

There seemed to be some chemistry there and I felt that she had noticed me.

 

A few months later I joined a few colleagues from work down the pub and she was there. She moved other people along so she could sit down beside me and we talked and drank as a group.

 

She would rest her hand on my leg, touch my hand.

 

A bowl of chips was ordered for the group. She would pick up a chip and feed me.

 

I accepted and she did this many times during the evening.

 

Am I looking into this too much or was that a romantic gesture?

 

Guy, hope I'm not hijacking your thread!

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Two of my colleagues, both married but not to each other, were sharing food and essentially eating in each other's plate. She'd cut him a little piece of meat and he'd put some of his veggies in her plate.

 

 

I'm not reading too much into this. What is very intimate is taking food from someone's plate and that's considered rude and against food sharing etiquette if you are friends only.

 

What 2sure described is really creepy though. yuck.

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Some cultures just share food a lot. Even some americans get in the habit of just offering up stuff on their plate they don't want and asking to try things on other peoples plates.

 

I think its gross. When I was in the middle east I had to eat under barbaric food sharing conditions... the toilets were insane.....

 

i suppose it's appropriate to ask - did they offer and share their food with you as well as between the two of them?

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A few months later I joined a few colleagues from work down the pub and she was there. She moved other people along so she could sit down beside me and we talked and drank as a group.

 

She would rest her hand on my leg, touch my hand.

 

A bowl of chips was ordered for the group. She would pick up a chip and feed me.

 

I accepted and she did this many times during the evening.

 

Am I looking into this too much or was that a romantic gesture?

 

Guy, hope I'm not hijacking your thread!

 

can't believe you haven't had sex yet. that should have been the next step

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Posted by Castillo

A few months later I joined a few colleagues from work down the pub and she was there. She moved other people along so she could sit down beside me and we talked and drank as a group.

 

She would rest her hand on my leg, touch my hand.

 

A bowl of chips was ordered for the group. She would pick up a chip and feed me.

 

I accepted and she did this many times during the evening.

 

Am I looking into this too much or was that a romantic gesture?

 

 

can't believe you haven't had sex yet. that should have been the next step

 

yep - this gal gave all the clues that she wants you and is available to see you.

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can't believe you haven't had sex yet. that should have been the next step

 

The situation was a bit tricky. A colleague who I work with is besotted with her and has been friendzoned by her. One moment he says he's "just friends" with her and the next he says "I'd marry her in a heartbeat"

I don't have much contact with this girl, but he seems very threatened by me regarding her.

 

I'm now an established member of the team and I'm now in a situation where I don't care if I upset him. I hope she hasn't lost interest!

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I went out for lunch with a few people from work.

 

Two of my colleagues, both married but not to each other, were sharing food and essentially eating in each other's plate. She'd cut him a little piece of meat and he'd put some of his veggies in her plate.

 

Sharing food is something that I typically same for my SO but I'd be interested to hear what you think.

 

I have done this with friends as well as colleagues of both sexes. It would have to be with someone I knew fairly well. IME it doesn't necessarily imply anything romantic.

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Okay Okay we get it sheesh. You're living in Korea eating banchan.

 

Why is it in every thread you're always trying to show off. Whether it be living in Korea, flaunting your self imposed intellectual superiority or high moral standards.

 

It seems like you're so insecure of your self that you thrive when people perceive you in these lights of manner.

 

Are you that freaking dense you cannot correctly analyze the situation where the sharing is exclusive to those two?! Where they were eating off each other's plate! Not side dishes, main dishes or hot pot?

 

You even claimed living in America, all the more reason for you to understand.

 

But nope, you wanted to use any opportunity to brag that you're living in Korea.

 

I'd actually respect you if you gave your own opinion (even though It's wrong) instead of always trying to manufacture some smug quib.

 

Just trying to be precise. My thoughts and opinions are shaped a lot by having lived in Korea, and this is one of the instances where. Even when we eat Western food (like TGI Fridays or whatnot) with Westerners, a lot of the food gets shared and passed around. This obviously colors my opinions. I state the reasoning for my opinions.

 

Anyone with a decent photograph, a good accent, a college degree, a clean bill of health, and a passport can come teach in Korea. It's not really something to brag about. I've no care to how people see me on a message board. I do tend to be uber-specific about where my opinions come from.

 

Besides, I commented on both my thoughts from Korea and recollections from America in my post. You just chose to quote that small part and fuss about it. I've always been a sharer. Even more so now.

Edited by zengirl
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meerkat stew

Sharing is one thing, eating out of someone else's plate at a group meal among casual acquaintances is another. IME, people who are prone to this type of behavior are disordered. That sounds hilariously alarmist I know, but every time I've seen that sort of behavior in someone, it comes out later they are on meds for some serious issue or have been institutionalized in the past.

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