Kris30 Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 First, some background: This guy (Jack) and I are exclusive. It was he who wanted it and we have discussed it. Jack has been very sweet so far, texting me often saying how much he likes me and misses me, can't wait to see me, etc. Well, Jack and I had sex for the first time yesterday... Or we sort of did, he ejaculated prematurely. But he was wowed by the blow job I gave him and still sending me sweet text messages when I got home. I inviited him to come to my place on Tues. evening for dinner and to stay over. Last night he was all about it (this was after we had sex) and I've really been looking forward to a special evening with him. Well, I talked to him on the phone a little earlier and when I asked about him coming tomorrow he replied, "Yeah, I'll come over for a little bit," and mentioned my cat might bother him (he is allergic) so we wouls have to see. I am hurt because what happened to the guy who loved spending time with me and even last night couldn't wait to see me?! Is he being a jerk? Do I just talk to him and tell him how I feel? I do think he has trouble opening up emotionally. What do I do? I'm feeling hurt... Link to post Share on other sites
Ihavenoidea Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Maybe he is nervous about prematuring again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kris30 Posted May 24, 2010 Author Share Posted May 24, 2010 That just doesn't seem to be it... Should I call and talk to him about how I'm feeling? Link to post Share on other sites
marsle85 Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 He does NOT want to talk about his premature ejaculation. Do NOT talk to him about it, it's way too early... you're not even sure if this is a consistent thing. Give him space- he's human... he needs it. Let him come back to you, he'll want even more than before. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kris30 Posted May 24, 2010 Author Share Posted May 24, 2010 I'm NOT thinking of talking to him about the premature ejaculation, but about why he's suddenly acting different than before and why he's not wanting to see me... Do I talk to him or just wait for him to contact me and initiate us getting together again? Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 He might be feeling a little self-conscious, I wouldn't worry too much about it Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 IF i were allergic to cats - i wouldn't be in a hurry to go to anyone's house if the cat were going to make me miserable by being there. Link to post Share on other sites
marsle85 Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Nah, I really really *really* wouldn't. The relationship is still early. Give it a week. Start to back off a little, let him chase you. Don't text a lot, don't call, try retain a little mystery. People go in and out of phases- maybe he's back into the "do I really like her?" stage. If that's the case, the LAST thing you should be doing is that typical: "are we okay? why are you acting like this?" He knows he's acting like it, and you're asking him because YOU want to feel better- not because of him. Let it pass, if in a week he's still weird, mention it casually. Honestly, I think a little time away and maybe a little nonchalance is the answer to your problem. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kris30 Posted May 25, 2010 Author Share Posted May 25, 2010 Ok, thanks a bunch. I will just wait and back off a bit as Marsle suggested. It's just strange.. He has been the one wanting to see me a lot. I turned down seeing him Friday, but saw him Sat. & Sun. Plus after the sex yesterday he said he was in awe and last night was texting me saying I was the best. I just hope that now that we've had sex he doesn't think he can be a jerk. But I will back off and let him chase. This weekend I will be gone 3 days visiting family so maybe that will help...? Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted May 25, 2010 Share Posted May 25, 2010 (edited) Why can't you go to his place if he is allergic to cats? This can be a big deal for some people. My boss dated a woman with two cats and he could never make it through the night because he'd wake up choking so she always had to go to his place. Maybe watch Something About Mary together with the scene of Ben Stiller jerking off in the bathroom so he wouldn't get too excited being with Cameron Diaz. Maybe your boyfriend would get the hint. Edited May 25, 2010 by FitChick Link to post Share on other sites
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