Am I just a friend or is there potential?

[JAJ]

Hey all, this is my first post here. I found it trying to google similar problems and I liked most all of what I read. I'll try to make it short but if you need anything else I can let you know.

 

I have known this girl for around seven years. Up until about a year ago we never talked to each other much. In high school we'd talk in passing and she was dating a friend of mine back then so I'd chat with her if I was talking to him. After I graduated I never talked to her much, maybe like once or twice per year at most in a text or on Facebook. About a year ago I started talking to her and we talked a lot. She mentioned at one point she broke up with her high school sweetheart and then we kept talking. I was out of state for several more months to come but she always said we should hang out and sent me messages or texts saying "hurry home!"

 

When I got back home she was in town for a couple days, she goes to school a couple hours away, and invited me to hang out with her and a few of her friends. When I got there she gave me a hug and when I left she gave me another. The next time we hung out we went to lunch. I picked her up but she didn't let me pay for her. We talked for a couple hours until she said she hated to cut it short but had to be somewhere else soon so I took her there and dropped her off. On the way she said it was a lot of fun and we should hang out again sometime. She also said that I'm a lot different than what she remembers that I'm more mature.

 

The next time we hung out was about two months later during her Christmas break. We were going to hang out a few times in this time and since our last hangout but never really finalized any plans. Well her last day before she went back she invited me over to her house so I could watch movies with her and her friend. Then it was a few weeks later she was back in town I asked her if she wanted to go to dinner and she agreed. This time I paid for dinner and she just asked if I was sure and thanked me.

 

The last time we hung out I went to visit her where she went to school. I brought her a birthday gift for her upcoming birthday and she talked about how she loved it the entire time I was there. We went to dinner with one of her school friends and she asked a fourth if they wanted to go but they didn't. Then we went to a bar afterwards and just hung out for a while with a huge group of her school friends. After that we went back to her apartment and talked for a few hours until we both went to sleep, I stayed on her couch. The next morning we talked for a little longer and had plans to do something else but she realized we couldn't do them that day so I left around that point.

 

We have flirted and teased each other quite a few times online and kind of in person. In person there always seems to be good body language between us. There is always eye contact and our conversations never seem to get boring we laugh at what each other says a lot. We hug, each time we see each other, but the one time I dropped her off at her house she told me to hug her in the car before she got out. She never really gave me the chance to walk her to the door. However when she was walking away she turned back around waved and smiled then kept walking. The last time we hung out it got kind of awkward, for the first time I ever really noticed, and we both looked at each other and looked away several times while standing at her door and talking then we hugged for a minute but I let go first. It probably would have kept going but then again I don't know for sure. She tells me she misses me a lot, but last time I asked her if I could take her to a restaurant she wanted to try she took until the next day to reply. This was in a text message though, up to the point I asked she texted me back quickly but then I had to wait a day for my answer. She told me in the reply "sorry I had issues, but sounds like fun!" And then again I told her I bought a movie we both wanted to see and she said next time she was in town we have to watch it.

 

So basically all I am wanting to know is if she likes me or just sees me as a friend. I'm really confused, usually it's clear cut but I get those signals that sometimes say 'friend'.

[boogieboy]

You are just a friend, more like puppy dog. You offer too much of yourself. You lost the potential.

 

She only sees you as a friend, but likes your company. If she really liked you, she would have been giving you signs to kiss her, and you missed out. She keeps contacting you every once in a while to keep you on a string so she has company when everyone else bails on her. Theres nothing thats going to happen with her. Dont talk to her anymore.

Edited February 23, 2010 by boogieboy

[DustySaltus]

You've been friend zoned.

 

The only way to gauge her interest on any level would be to disappear for a while and let her miss you. Let her know that you aren't ok with just being her friend. Then VANISH. If she comes back you'll know it's for the right reasons. If she doesn't though, forget it and move on...sounds like she has enough friends already.