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Another one bites the dust


so gutted

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GREAT...I met a guy online and we chatted continously about everything for about 3 hours each night. We talked about a future, meeting up etc. He was a 9 out of 10.

 

He texted me the next day and there was never any awkwardness.

 

Now he has gone silent. Zilch. Zero.

 

I last heard from him 2 days ago. I am NOT going to repeat my previous habits and contact him.No way on Gods earth. No.

 

I am curious as to why the sudden change. he seems to have gone of me without giving me the chance to actually meet.

 

He is out of the country for xmas - which I knew about so why not just carry on the contact, say goodbye, wish me a happy xmas and then go?

 

I am utterly baffled as to why he has stopped bothering.

 

Curious. I didnt put pressure on him we agreed we would meet when he returns.

 

So - he has clearly moved on - but not told me.

 

I feel so stupid and HURT and that HOPE has died within me.

 

How can a girl get it wrong so many times??

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I am curious as to why the sudden change. he seems to have gone of me without giving me the chance to actually meet.

 

He is out of the country for xmas - which I knew about so why not just carry on the contact, say goodbye, wish me a happy xmas and then go?

 

I am utterly baffled as to why he has stopped bothering.

 

Curious. I didn't put pressure on him we agreed we would meet when he returns.

 

Was he the one to initiate contact 100% of the time? If that's the case, he probably figured you weren't interested and gave up. Either that or he simply lost interest (or wasn't that interested to begin with).

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does he have internet / cell service in the other country?

Perhaps packing & arranging travel got too much & he forgot to text?

 

being out of the country is still a legitimate excuse as far as I know.

Relax.

 

give him a day after is planed return.

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As far as I know he hasnt left this country yet - unless he left sooner then he said. he didnt leave me an email or anything.

 

He intiated the contact the first 3 days (heavily) and then he texted ...only one day did I intiate contact first, after which he still texted me first!

 

For a genuine intelligent guy who was talking very deeply, he turned put to be a typical jerk.

 

He is away for 2 weeks. He didnt take the trouble to call me before he went (if he has gone) and just cut of.

 

I am upset that I was holding on to a nice thought for the new year and he has shattered it.

 

Maybe - I am too much hassle for him. I do not believe he is too busy - noone is this busy (at work) so close to xmas. He has moved on.

 

I know it was online only, but he really took the trouble to get to know me. This is mental torture.

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Why don't you just try contacting him? It's not like it's a huge deal. I agree that he is probably trying to gauge your interest because he's the one that's been initiating all the time.

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He intiated the contact the first 3 days (heavily) and then he texted ...only one day did I intiate contact first, after which he still texted me first!

 

There's your explanation. Failure to initiate contact is usually seen as a sign of ambivalence. While is it accepted that men usually initiate first contact, it should be more balanced once you've already started talking. If you were leaving him to do all the work, it's no wonder he got tired of it. He probably thinks that you're either not interested or playing games.

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Hey! It's always possible he isn't who he says he is- maybe his pics are fake or old, perhaps he's married...one can never be too sure. I talked to quite a few guys from online dating that turned out to be married or looked nothing like their pics once we met.

 

Regardless, it's only been a couple days. I think you're playing it right by not contacting him. You agreed to meet him, so he knows the interest level is there.

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thanks - It is possible that I was blinded by his manners and charm (very rare).

 

He hasnt called or even sent a message after creating the impression that that was how it was going to be.

 

I am just upset that he ignited hope and then dashed it so quickly.

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When did you first start contacting? It is the weekend - maybe he had plans and wasn't glued to his computer for contact.

 

don't sweat it - but more importantly, don't get emotionally attached to a guy until you meet him! (if not later...)

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WE started talking about a week ago. Everyone has internet on their phones and he can still text. I know he is away but all i actually wanted was a few texts and an email address so that we can keep up the momentum.

 

I think he is angry that I didnt fit my plans around him to meet him (at his convenience) before he left the country.

 

To top it of, I was well and he only mildly asked about how i was. I could be dead right now for all he knows.

 

I made the mistake i fell for the fantasy love that wasnt to be.

 

Need to get over it and stop kicking myyself. Easier said then done.

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I made the mistake i fell for the fantasy love that wasnt to be.

 

 

Yes. You have to stop getting carried away so fast. Take you time getting to know guys. There is no emergency.

 

And give this guy a chance. Why not proceed to meet him after his vacations, as planned?

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because in order to do that there needs to be contact, and he got rid of the contact by not bothering. A simple, hi how r u? would be fine but he has CHOSEN to be an idoit. He seemed INTERESTED in me and managed to get all sorts of information out of me (not identity stuff) - we were intellectually on a level and that was nice. I was not dumbing down.

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I am angry coz its been 3 nights and 4 days with no contact and he didnt leave me an email address even - despite me asking when do you fly out.

 

I am now really angry and also want to know why he changed his stance but cannot confront him because his crime is not contacting me - i do not want to look desperate.

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sameoldsameold

sorry to hear so gutted...... I think you're right, do NOT contact him. It might be some logical explanation. If you contact him its making it too easy for him.

 

Stay positive, if he doesn't contact you he's not for you and there's somebody fantastic just waiting around the corner!!

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I am angry coz its been 3 nights and 4 days with no contact and he didnt leave me an email address even - despite me asking when do you fly out.

 

I am now really angry and also want to know why he changed his stance but cannot confront him because his crime is not contacting me - i do not want to look desperate.

 

HOLY Crap are you a psycho or something?

You've never met the guy.. he owes you nothing.. stop acting like the world is about to end cause he hasn't contacted you. Its the holidays.. regardless of whether you believe he should txt you or not.. he is under no obligation and has his own life to deal with. You txt'd him once.. sorry but thats not enough to maintain interest... if you did that to me I'd stop contacting you also.

 

So you come in here flaming mad.. I'll tell ya if this is how you react after a few days.. I'd be running fast in the other direction. You got way too attached too soon. Thats not his fault.. stop trying to blame him.

 

You may not want to look desperate.. but you are certifiably acting like it here. Believe it or not.. some of us do have things to deal with during the holidays.. and if you cannot be bothered to send a txt.. why should we?

 

You said you agreed to meet when he returns.. guess what.. that means its perfectly normal for him to not say a word till he returns..

 

You come off as totally clingy and needy which is quite a turn off.. if you come across as that on a toneless forum.. I can just imagine how you are in person. BUT you haven't even met yet..

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Well I checked online and guess what the world has not stopped, he hasnt been stranded at the airport or anything HE HAS BEEN ONLINE FISHING FOR WOMEN.

 

So everything he said to me was bull. He has moved on FAST.

 

WOW.

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Well I checked online and guess what the world has not stopped, he hasnt been stranded at the airport or anything HE HAS BEEN ONLINE FISHING FOR WOMEN.

 

So everything he said to me was bull. He has moved on FAST.

 

WOW.

Were you expecting him to pine for you?

If you didn't make much effort to keep in contact.. yea he will move on..

I doubt it was all BS.. but you can interpret it how you want.

 

After awhile most guys realize that if its not going to go anywhere.. there is no point dwelling on it..

Its impossible to know why he broke it off.. maybe it was something you said?

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WE started talking about a week ago.
This has been an incredibly short time, to expect anything from anyone, real life or cyberspace.

 

I made the mistake i fell for the fantasy love that wasnt to be.
There's no way you're in love. You barely know him.

 

Need to get over it and stop kicking myyself. Easier said then done.
Yes, you do need to get over it. Why are you kicking yourself for something that lasted a week? Even if you chatted 4 hours a day, it doesn't exceed 28 hours of getting to know each other.
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