Kell Posted April 13, 2003 Share Posted April 13, 2003 What do you do when, whenever you start something new with a guy, you are only reminded of how good it was with your ex and you stuff things up? I have just had a second date with a guy I know is nice, but he is not HIM. I hate it, its sabotaging my every chance of finding someone nice. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 It happens all the time. Perhaps you aren't ready to start dating again. But the better solution is to train your mind to understand that everybody's different and your ex is in the past. It's simply not fair to any new guy who comes into your life to compare him to some guy you were in love with in the past. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kell Posted April 14, 2003 Author Share Posted April 14, 2003 Thanks Tony, I'd hate to think that I'm not ready to date though... it's been a year and we only dated for 2 months (they were intense and i know taht the time apart is significantly greater than time together, but as i said, we clicked). We broke up over something so trivial (a misunderstanding that i wanted to move in with him too soon... i didn't but he wouldn't believe me). But I digress. How do you know if something is truely in your past or whether you just haven't given it enough of a go? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 YOU ASK: "How do you know if something is truely in your past or whether you just haven't given it enough of a go?" When you start dating someone you are truly excited about, you will answer this question for yourself. You now have to find out why it is taking you so long to move past this very short relationship you had a long time ago. That's not normal, in my opinion. Just stop making comparisons and be on your way!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kell Posted April 14, 2003 Author Share Posted April 14, 2003 I understand how you would think that 2 months is hardly a substantial amount of time, but we were actually friends before, and spent 50% of the 2 months together. We went away on holidays for a week. Everything was going so strong until one day... he didn't know how to take my emotions and it all just got out of hand. Surely if things take a 360 in 30 minutes it shouldn't be a permanent change? It's quite ridiculous when I think about it. one minute we were so together and literally the next it was in pieces. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 you may want to make a separate post about that 2-month r/s. it sounds like you need to let it all out & ask some questions about how come it happened the way it happened, before you'll be ready to move on ... -yes Link to post Share on other sites
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