Rae Posted April 13, 2003 Share Posted April 13, 2003 This is my first time here and I was just wondering about something. I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years now, our relationship is great and everything...I treat him like a king. He's great with me too, he respects me and all, but sometimes I worry that if I am always acting so loving and "perfect" around him...will he take me for granted and walk all over me? I don't want him to think that he's my entire life... I have outside interests too. I'm not the kind of person to play mind games, but is it a good idea to be aloof and "play it cool" sometimes to show the other person that you don't live solely for them? Any advice would be great!! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 14, 2003 Share Posted April 14, 2003 YOU ASK: "I'm not the kind of person to play mind games, but is it a good idea to be aloof and "play it cool" sometimes to show the other person that you don't live solely for them?" You absolutely have to. And if he ever starts taking you for granted in any way or starts treating you without consideration or respect, you must immediately let him know that it's not acceptable and he better shape up real fast or you'll be out of there. Some people can handle niceness better than others. But for many, it's very easy to get bored and lose interest in a partner who is consistently too nice, too accomodating, too available, too predictable. You have no idea the passion you can draw out of a partner by behaving outside the norm....on an intermittent basis. Always keep them guessing. You may have a partner who is psychologically together and who knows how to appreciate a nice lady. If that's the case, you're a very lucky girl. Do whatever it takes to keep him around...unless you're getting bored. Link to post Share on other sites
Ladybug313 Posted April 15, 2003 Share Posted April 15, 2003 I totally know what you are getting at. Tony pretty much said it all, but yeah, it's important to have your own life, keep busy, and do your own thing too that doesn't include him all the time. And I don't really see this as playing mind games because in a way you really are just doing your thing and your partner will find that very attractive. Just be careful that you don't do it so much that you end up neglecting him or leaving him out of everything ( which I am sure you won't do). For example let him know about what's going on in your life, the activities you are doing and stuff. I am sure he would love to hear about them and at the same time, you are still keeping in touch with him. The biggest mistake I made I think, was being too available, and having my schedule revolve around his. ( Like I used to do these dinner things with my pals but then I would try to keep my days TOO FREE for him, and that turned him off. Doing the dinner thing AND making time for the guy sure made a difference.) The best thing is to keep all the interests you had before the guy entered your life, but make sufficient time with him too. Link to post Share on other sites
scoobs93 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 You have to be like that.....but don't play it too cool otherwise it could cause problems in your relationship. I know from experience. Well Good luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
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