Sirius Posted April 7, 2003 Share Posted April 7, 2003 I happen to be an older male virgin who is unhappy about his situation. Because of intense shyness, for which I am seeking to overcome and haven't really had my fair share of intimate relationships and none that involved sex. I would someday like to share myself with a special woman. Because of my lack of experience, I assume it would be helpful if she did some of the teaching. Would women be open to this? I can't see pornos teaching me too much about sex. Most pornos have that hard loveless sex and don't emphasize the affectionate intimacy, for which I prefer. What are some good books or videos that emphasize the art of good love making and not just one-night-stand sex? Can good foreplay and sensuous expressions make up for a lack of sex knowledge? I.E. if I cuddle with the woman more( something women express they don't get enough from men) and make her feel special, can that compensate if I'm not the best Don Juan in bed? Women should know that virgins are eager to please and will usually let them set the tone on what THEY WANT. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 7, 2003 Share Posted April 7, 2003 You need not be concerned. Most women will be very understanding and would be delighted to be your first. Some would even fight for the chance...do don't be shy about telling them. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 7, 2003 Share Posted April 7, 2003 heck, every gal appreciates good foreplay and sensuality in a lover, whether he's got little experience or a lot. Most of the time, if we feel good about what goes on before wankies and hoo-hoos meet up, it makes the coupling all the better. and no jokes about the hoo-hoos, guys! Link to post Share on other sites
Onnie Posted April 7, 2003 Share Posted April 7, 2003 Most women this day and age are very willing to teach any man (regardless of sexual skill) what they want in bed. Just be verbal, honest, and open-minded. If you want to 'beef' up on the subject prior to the event I suggest visiting your local adult bookstore (not the sleazy kind that only rents videos) and ask about educational videos or books....if you go to the right place there will tons of them. Also larger metro areas (example Seattle where I am) have adult bookstores that often provide educational classes and lectures. And I cannot stress this enough...learn what makes a woman's body work...learn about a woman's anatomy. Be safe & good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 8, 2003 Share Posted April 8, 2003 Experience does not equal talent. A lot of men think they are wonderful when they really aren't but women, knowing the whole 'male ego' thing, won't disabuse them of the notion so they never improve - or think they don't need to. I agree with the others; educate yourself - not by reading men's magazines or watching heavy porn because they are all about pleasing the men. Follow the suggestions to rent some good videos or read some good books and then wow your first lady with your willingness to spend time on foreplay. Enthusiasm and willingness to please are a zillion percent more valuable than experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sirius Posted April 8, 2003 Author Share Posted April 8, 2003 I will definitely take this advice to heart. Thank you for your helpful replies. Yes, I believe the most basic fundamentals to good love making is an eagerness to please and know what makes the other person feel like they're on Cloud Nine. From what I've read, passionate foreplay is a must with most women. Well, I will get educated, cross my fingers and hope for the best. Thank you all. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 8, 2003 Share Posted April 8, 2003 From what I've read, passionate foreplay is a must with most women. Well, I will get educated, cross my fingers and hope for the best And then please get yourself cloned! Link to post Share on other sites
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