frenchgirl Posted September 20, 2008 Share Posted September 20, 2008 This guy has been a good friend of my brother's for many years. I've hung out with them on a few occasions. Maybe four years ago I got the feeling he was interested so I had the talk with him to let him know I just wanted to be friends. As expected, we didn't hang out much after the chat and I haven't seen him since. He recently sent me a message on Facebook, suggesting we go out for drinks. I've never been out alone with him and I wonder if I might mislead him if I accept? Or do most guys understand after the first "friend" chat? Link to post Share on other sites
westrock Posted September 20, 2008 Share Posted September 20, 2008 You had the "friend" chat with him 4 years ago? That's a long time ago and people change over that time period. Maybe speak with your brother to get some more recent information on this guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author frenchgirl Posted September 20, 2008 Author Share Posted September 20, 2008 You had the "friend" chat with him 4 years ago? That's a long time ago and people change over that time period. Maybe speak with your brother to get some more recent information on this guy. Actually I did speak with my brother about him... I know he's single but my brother didn't offer any additional insight on what the guy might have in mind. Do you think I should have the "friend" chat again with him? Link to post Share on other sites
westrock Posted September 20, 2008 Share Posted September 20, 2008 Do you think I should have the "friend" chat again with him? That depends on what are your intentions. What would be your motivation for accepting his invite for drinks? Is there any reason why you can't just accept his invite, meet up, see how it goes before deciding on whether to have another friend chat? Just because you get together for drinks it does not mean that you're saying you want a relationship. It's just drinks. Who knows, maybe you will have a great time, but it is really up to you what you want out of this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author frenchgirl Posted September 20, 2008 Author Share Posted September 20, 2008 That depends on what are your intentions. What would be your motivation for accepting his invite for drinks? Is there any reason why you can't just accept his invite, meet up, see how it goes before deciding on whether to have another friend chat? Just because you get together for drinks it does not mean that you're saying you want a relationship. It's just drinks. Who knows, maybe you will have a great time, but it is really up to you what you want out of this. Well I can't entirely turn him down and I can't ignore his invite either... So either I go or else I might ask my brother to tag along... Link to post Share on other sites
westrock Posted September 20, 2008 Share Posted September 20, 2008 Well I can't entirely turn him down and I can't ignore his invite either... So either I go or else I might ask my brother to tag along... You have the right to decline his invite. Just because he asks to get together doesn't mean you have to accept his invite, even if he is your brother's friend. Sounds like you have decided to get together and the only issue is whether to go alone or have your brother tag along. If you're not comfortable going alone, then tell him that you can get together for drinks and you'll check with your brother's schedule so he can join in too. Hope that helps. Link to post Share on other sites
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