clia Posted January 9, 2002 Share Posted January 9, 2002 Been a long time, but I'm back. Background is I met a guy right before Thanksgiving who I really like. However, given the holidays, that I was in the midst of finals, etc., we've only gone on one date. However, I met him through friends, so we've hung out with others probably five or six times, and have been e-mailing and talking on the phone quite a bit. Last week he was in a car accident. He's okay, but has been housebound since and will be probably for the next couple of weeks until he heals from his surgery. That doesn't bother me. But since this happened, we've been talking on the phone two or three times a day (obviously because I want to make sure he's okay or if he needs anything), I've driven him to the doctor, hung out with him at his apartment, done other things for him, etc. Basically, because of the accident, things aren't following the normal course of a relationship like I'm used to. I don't know what my problem is, but all of a sudden I feel like this is moving way too fast. Like we are doing things that you should not be doing after 6 weeks into dating. I mean, I've never even kissed this guy, yet I'm talking to him on the phone more than once a day and doing all these things that a girlfriend would do! I don't mind at all. I mean, I want to do whatever I can to help him out, but it's making me feel a little weird, as in, what's going to happen once he's all healed in a couple of weeks. You're all probably going to tell me I'm crazy and stupid, but this feels strange to me. I'm trying to rewrite the dating rules in my head to deal with this, but it's hard for me when we've only been on one date. Maybe I'm worrying over nothing and he feels the same way I do--I really don't know, but I really don't want to start a panic for myself. I don't want to suddenly be the girlfriend once he's okay--I want to date him first. I guess it's nice to get to know each other on a friendly level like this before it reaches the next step, but it's strange. Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 9, 2002 Share Posted January 9, 2002 I understand your predicament and I know how you feel. But the situation occurred and it seems you have made the best of it. From my perspective, if this guy doesn't see what a wonderful lady you are...one who sticks by him and gives him assistance and support when he's down, sick, whatever...he doesn't deserve your time. If I was him, I'd grab you in a flash once I got back on my feet. Just hang around long enough to see if he's like me. As far as dating is concerned, it will be up to you to make sure the courting process continues in a normal fashion once he gets to feeling better. It'll be up to you to take the relationship backwards a bit, put up a little distance, and restart the whole thing. I understand perfectly how you would feel odd in a situation like this but it may very well work in your favor if this guy is smart. Link to post Share on other sites
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