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do you think im fussy?


sultry33

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hi, i need some advice please:bunny:

 

i will be completly honest in my type etc... but need some input as to if you think im too damn fussy.. as my friends say i am lol

 

i like taller guys 5-8 and above, age from 25- 40

dark hair/eyes.. would consider blonde maybe

not too worried about bulid although not too skinny.

preffer a guy who has children

good sense of humour, caring, honest a real genuine guy.. has a car.. lives on his own.. has a job.

holds good conversation.. like sex but is not too forward

chases but not too much..

can be moody, cheeky.. playful

 

ok i know it seems alot but honestly its what i like:p

 

i had a date yesterday and we get on well except he is short.. bit loud, bit forward and will definatly want more than a kiss if i see him again..

he seems like a really nice guy.. im just not feeling the attraction .. does that part take time? or does it happen over time? do you think i should see him again but not go any further than a kiss.. as im not ready for intimate anyway.. plus im not feeling it:eek:

 

he calls me everyday.. we talk on msn.. he makes me laugh a lot.. he is so sweet and deep down id hate to hurt him but i think he would fall for me to quick.. any advice? x

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I don't think you're too fussy. Sounds pretty reasonable to me. Heck, if I listed my criteria it'd go on for miles (I found a great guy that matched it too).

 

You completely described my brother in your list of criteria. haha (I'm not counting the sex part.. I have no idea on that one)

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he calls me everyday.. we talk on msn.. he makes me laugh a lot.. he is so sweet and deep down id hate to hurt him but i think he would fall for me to quick.. any advice? x

 

I think there's no chemistry because he is too loud and too forward. If you felt more comfortable with those aspects then I think the chemistry would be there.

 

Maybe you could just tell him that you aren't comfortable with his sexual advances, and that you feel he is being too pushy and forward. Lay it out there, see how he responds. If he's willing to tone it down and handles it like an adult, then you might have a keeper. If he gets irate, angry, upset, whatever... then toss him quick.

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I don't think you're too fussy. Sounds pretty reasonable to me. Heck, if I listed my criteria it'd go on for miles (I found a great guy that matched it too).

 

You completely described my brother in your list of criteria. haha (I'm not counting the sex part.. I have no idea on that one)

 

cool there is hope for me yet.. a guy does exsist that matches all ;)

 

im really unsure what to do about the nice guy.. im tempted to just say ..

it was a good date but im really keen to take it slow..

i kinda dont want to give up on him as we do get on well, but on the otherhand i dont want to lead him on if it wont go past just that.. getting on well.

i know he wants more .. just thinking if its best to bail out now.

tough decisions:confused:

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Bail now!

 

If you are not feeling it... don't continue.

 

He will feel that you were playing him and leading him on.

 

Just end it and find somebody who does it for you:).

 

CHeers lass,

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Are there many single fathers, gainfully employed that live alone in the UK?

 

I would think that narrows the field a lot... would you date a guy with no kids?

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Hey, consider yourself lucky that you can identify a "type" that does it for you. :)

 

How often has someone met "the list" and you've still not found them attractive?

 

FWIW, as you get older, the list gets shorter. Don't know if that's a blessing or a curse.

 

Current guy? I'd pass if I didn't feel the sexual chemistry since that's what he put out there first. If he had expressed romantic interest in a more reserved way and wasn't so "loud and forward", I'd have given him a few more dates to see what developed. Generally, a reserved gentleman or "good guy" does not act loud and sexual to impress a date, especially a first date. I'm afraid that what you see is what you get here...

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Bail now!

 

If you are not feeling it... don't continue.

 

He will feel that you were playing him and leading him on.

 

Just end it and find somebody who does it for you:).

 

CHeers lass,

 

yeah im thinking the same tbh.. id rather bail now

id prefer it if the feelings was stronger.. i know myself id be distant within week or less;)

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Are there many single fathers, gainfully employed that live alone in the UK?

 

I would think that narrows the field a lot... would you date a guy with no kids?

 

i dont know but they dont have to live together.. i just mean someone who has a family..

i would consider dating a guy with no children just i cannot have anymore.. and in my last rs i think it strained our rs abit as i felt guilty.. even though he said did not want kids..

so basically id prefer it if they had family already :)

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Hey, consider yourself lucky that you can identify a "type" that does it for you. :)

 

How often has someone met "the list" and you've still not found them attractive?

 

FWIW, as you get older, the list gets shorter. Don't know if that's a blessing or a curse.

 

Current guy? I'd pass if I didn't feel the sexual chemistry since that's what he put out there first. If he had expressed romantic interest in a more reserved way and wasn't so "loud and forward", I'd have given him a few more dates to see what developed. Generally, a reserved gentleman or "good guy" does not act loud and sexual to impress a date, especially a first date. I'm afraid that what you see is what you get here...

 

lol it took me a while to realise i had a type.. and yea some did tick all the boxes and i was not attracted.. just sometimes they had another reason that i did not like.. its just my overall type but can be adjusted if the feeling is right..

for me gut feeling.. is the best sign

 

you are right in that as you get older you change .. when i was 18 the look of a hairy chest turned me right off.. but my ex was like a teddy bear lol

 

thanks for your advice really helps me :)

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Trialbyfire

No way are you way too fussy. I do agree that you should cut him loose if you're not feeling it.

 

Also, this guy sounds like he's too brash/pushy for you, which I can easily understand you not finding attractive. There's a fine line between confidence and cockiness or brashness. Alphas are sexy. Bantam roosters are annoying.

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No way are you way too fussy. I do agree that you should cut him loose if you're not feeling it.

 

Also, this guy sounds like he's too brash/pushy for you, which I can easily understand you not finding attractive. There's a fine line between confidence and cockiness or brashness. Alphas are sexy. Bantam roosters are annoying.

 

yea i think thats it.. im quite shy and he knew this.. i did kiss but he went in for full on snog.. almost ate me :eek:

i could sense he was getting courage to kiss but blimey..

i didnt feel anything but ouch..

did kiss him again though to see if it was beginers luck.. but no.. we just didnt fit:)

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Trialbyfire
yea i think thats it.. im quite shy and he knew this.. i did kiss but he went in for full on snog.. almost ate me :eek:

i could sense he was getting courage to kiss but blimey..

i didnt feel anything but ouch..

did kiss him again though to see if it was beginers luck.. but no.. we just didnt fit:)

Ick...:sick:

 

There's a subtle art to seduction. ;):love:

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Ick...:sick:

 

There's a subtle art to seduction. ;):love:

 

lol.. i did say that he should slow the kissing down .. said he was going too fast.. he was like noone has ever said that before?

 

i thought welcome to me haha, i say it as it is.. best way i think;)

just got to let him know now

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Sultry, I think it depends..

 

Lets say you meet a man, and he seems wonderful. But you don't match up to his criteria.. He likes you but...

 

He wants a womans hair to be a bit darker..

 

Feels your breasts should be a little bigger.

 

Legs a little longer.

 

Is he being too fussy?

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Sultry, I think it depends..

 

Lets say you meet a man, and he seems wonderful. But you don't match up to his criteria.. He likes you but...

 

He wants a womans hair to be a bit darker..

 

Feels your breasts should be a little bigger.

 

Legs a little longer.

 

Is he being too fussy?

 

:rolleyes:

 

Sultry, no. You're absolutely not being too fussy. Your desires sound perfectly reasonable to me. And trust me, when the dude is brash at first, and practically rapes your face :sick:, it doesn't get any better... ;)

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Sultry, I think it depends..

 

Lets say you meet a man, and he seems wonderful. But you don't match up to his criteria.. He likes you but...

 

He wants a womans hair to be a bit darker.. i could dye it ;)

 

Feels your breasts should be a little bigger. any bigger id disappear lol

 

Legs a little longer. id agree with that

Is he being too fussy?

 

to be honest id want a guy who liked me for me.. just the way i am.. if he had a problem with me , my look then he is not worth me:D

 

id like to think that if the right guy came along id not judge him if he was a little shorter, blonder.. or louder.. but my preference is the above so initally id be looking for that.

 

i have heard of couples getting together that initally could not stand each other.. to me this is alien.. this is really why im asking the question..

do i judge too quick? am i fussy?:love:

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:rolleyes:

 

Sultry, no. You're absolutely not being too fussy. Your desires sound perfectly reasonable to me. And trust me, when the dude is brash at first, and practically rapes your face :sick:, it doesn't get any better... ;)

 

thanks stay gazer x

 

i feel terrible as he keeps calling me.. i was really busy but just picked up and he sounds so happy.. is talking about us meeting next week an all .. he is very

keen.

i could give it one more try.. or... say sorry but i can do just friends now..

 

its so complicated..:love:

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Well, maybe he feels like that too. If you feel he doesn't match up, then you are not worthy of him..:)

 

Anyway, don't listen to these women who "instantly dismiss" every guy they meet. They end up single and alone. Or maybe they really don't want a man so that approach works well for them.

 

And yes, millions and millions of people were not feeling love at first site, or on the first date, and they became very happy together.

 

Many hit it off on the first date and it fizzles out in 2 months.

 

And many women are just so strange. You complain if he calls too much? Complain if he doesn't call enough? Maybe some women need to go with the flow.

 

And we weren't on the date. Men don't need advice after a first date. Do you have feelings?

 

Just remember, if you pass over tons of guys looking for the one, and you finally find him, chances are he wont like you, as he is as picky as you are.

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Well, maybe he feels like that too. If you feel he doesn't match up, then you are not worthy of him..:)

 

Anyway, don't listen to these women who "instantly dismiss" every guy they meet. They end up single and alone. Or maybe they really don't want a man so that approach works well for them.

 

And yes, millions and millions of people were not feeling love at first site, or on the first date, and they became very happy together.

 

Many hit it off on the first date and it fizzles out in 2 months.

 

And many women are just so strange. You complain if he calls too much? Complain if he doesn't call enough? Maybe some women need to go with the flow.

 

And we weren't on the date. Men don't need advice after a first date. Do you have feelings?

 

Just remember, if you pass over tons of guys looking for the one, and you finally find him, chances are he wont like you, as he is as picky as you are.

 

hi woods i do agree with what you say.. as its what im feeling.. im not unhappy that he keeps calling.. i think he is nice.. just i dont want to hurt him if i cant do more than friends.

 

i know he is looking for more.. and with me it seems.

 

im not into leading someone on or dismissing someone when like you said these things can be overcome..

just difficult to explain.. i do like him but just not enough i dont think.

or not enough at the moment

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I don't know how it works for women, but I think l men know (at least I do) within 5 minutes what role that woman can play in their life.

 

If he is a man, I wouldn't worry about hurting his feelings. He isn't a little girl.

 

I can say this though..

 

When you date women from other cultures it is easier. If they go on a second date you know they like you. They express things. If they have sex with you, then they are yours, and vice versa.

 

Many felt I was a bit cold because I am used to the American system. Wait 4 days to call. Don't call too much. Don't wait too long. Don't act overly interested.

 

But only you know exactly how he sounds, and how the kiss went etc. I don't know why the women on loveshack are so eager to tell every woman to dump the man, yet they hang around in there own strange situations for long periods of time.

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Trialbyfire

sultry, just ignore bones/woods. He believes that every man deserves a chance regardless if he acts like a pig or a freak. :sick:

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Well if a man is a pig or freak to you, he isn't into you in the first place. Now this man is a pig freak too? lol

 

Some women don't understand gender roles and how they fit into them, so calling men names makes them feel better when their dates go horribly.

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Just remember, if you pass over tons of guys looking for the one, and you finally find him, chances are he wont like you, as he is as picky as you are.

 

So what, she should just settle for a guy who rapes her face and she's not into? :confused:

 

She shouldn't settle for anything less than absolute butterflies... :love:

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sultry, just ignore bones/woods. He believes that every man deserves a chance regardless if he acts like a pig or a freak. :sick:

 

LOL.. tbf

to be honest i dont like hurting upseting anyone really im not like that, but i dont want to dismiss someone over things that to some may seem trival..

he wasnt a pig.. freak or jerk, just was a bad kisser.. with me anyway.

ok an a bit short an loud.. he took the pis s out of a welsh woman accent.. him being itialian it was funny but not when he did it so loud:cool:

 

maybe im the bad kisser as i had been with same guy prev for 4 years and hell we could kiss.. sometimes he would get bit wet lol but hey noone is perfect.. he would blame me.. but i swallowed, hell it wasnt me:laugh:

 

this is the 1st proper date i have been on.. so im just seeing if my reasons... questions.. thoughts an desires are normal as my friends say im fussy too.. i just know what i like.

im not looking for the one btw just one i can kiss and want to see more of

someone who i be buggin with calls ;)

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