USBman Posted February 9, 2008 Share Posted February 9, 2008 Hi, Just came across this forum whilst searching for advise, and thought I should post my problem. Anyway, I have been seeing this girl for well over a month, and we have come fairly close, going out for around 3-4 times a week, whenever we can basically. She is a very different kind of person and I could tell she is more open and easier to talk to then other women. What is confusing me is that we have built up a fairly strong friendship/relationship and would hate to ruin that by thinking she feels the same way as me, which right now I am not sure. People tell me that she has got to feel something since we have been going out together a lot but the thing is, I don't think she considers that 'dating' more of just hanging out. She does not have much friends in this country, so I'm thinking that this would be the reason why we go out together so often. She even told me once that there was a guy from her past that just assumed they were attached because they 'hung out' a lot. And between us, there is also a 4 years age gap and she does comment on my age at times saying things like 'I am still young, etc', which does make me feel less confident about myself. I am just really confused, as you might be able to tell. Is there any sure way to tell how she feels without ruining this kind of friendship? USBman. Link to post Share on other sites
bella07 Posted February 9, 2008 Share Posted February 9, 2008 her little story about ' the guy from her past' could be a hint for you, if she suspect you've been getting the wrong idea. It's only been a month. Just take it easy. You don't want to risk ruining a perfectly good friendship just yet. Link to post Share on other sites
compassion42 Posted February 9, 2008 Share Posted February 9, 2008 I don't see anything wrong with talking about it. Especially if you word things in a non-assuming,non-threatening way. If you already know you at least have a nice friendship, it should be ok to talk about such things too. Do the two of you hold hands or kiss or anything like that? Link to post Share on other sites
Author USBman Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 Hi, Thanks for the responses.. I don't think the 'guy from the past' is a hint as I am sure I have been careful with what I say to her and to make sure I am not so direct and such. So to answer the other question, we haven't kissed or held hands as much as I wouldn't mind the latter. If I do talk to her about this, what would be a good, non-threatening way to word it? USBman. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 Is there any sure way to tell how she feels without ruining this kind of friendship? Yes. Start touching her. Start by touching her jewlery and comment on it. Touch her more and more, caress her hair, then try and give her a kiss on the cheek at the right moment, and see how she responds. If she is ok with that, you are on your way to kissing her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author USBman Posted February 10, 2008 Author Share Posted February 10, 2008 wow, is that a little forward? I'm from South East Asia, so I am unsure of that kind of actions due the the culture differences. Although I have always went to an International School, I know she hasn't. Hell, here, it is strange to hug a person of the opposite sex as a greeting.. Or maybe am just a little too timid? Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted February 10, 2008 Share Posted February 10, 2008 I'm from South East Asia... here, it is strange to hug a person of the opposite sex as a greeting.. Or maybe am just a little too timid? Oh, I see. Well, you'll have to do the kind of touching that is appropriate then. I don't know, give her something and touch her fingers. See how she responds. Link to post Share on other sites
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