TheRock Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 How do I act to be a challenge while dating my girl. Been with her for over a year, but still want to keep her attracted. Link to post Share on other sites
jophil28 Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 How do I act to be a challenge while dating my girl. Been with her for over a year, but still want to keep her attracted. Your objective should always be to keep HER interest level high. Being a "challenge" is just part of this, IT is real easy to be drawn into being a part the wussification of America: Firstly NEVER ask advice from women . They have no reality about what they really want or are drawn to. They will tell you whatever Cosmo has filled their head with. Secondly, you need to understand what women are attracted to at a primal level. Some of these qualities are - Unshakeable Confidence Strength of purpose in his dealings with the world Unpredicability and intrigue An uncontrollable spirit A cool indifference An ability to make her FEEL intensely. (I can sense the women reading this getting all tingling ) Dude, this short list will will get you started . Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 If you need to be an emotional challenge to a girl/woman, after dating her for a year, she's got a lot of growing up to do. If anything, emotional consistency is far more attractive, as long as you don't roll-over and play doormat. Why not challenge her mind, if this is the type of girl she is? If not, romance her, but not the over-the-top stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytie TV Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 Mother hen has spoken Anyway OP, I don't believe you can truly act as a challenge unless you truly, deep down, know that if the relationship fails that it wouldn't really matter. The key to being aloof and challenging, yes you guessed it, is to not care. It's the lack of concern that makes it effective, otherwise it comes off as a shallow attempt and you look silly. Do you want that to be you? Link to post Share on other sites
halfarock Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 Maybe being a challenge isn’t the thing to do. I’ve always gone with, ‘keep them entertained, keep them guessing’. I often give my girlfriend things, mostly worthless junk, like things that I find lying along the road or goofy looking stuffed animals that I get at thrift stores for 50 cents. Sometimes I pick a wild flower or draw for her a picture. These little gifts I give very inconsistently. Sometime I’ll give her something everyday for a few days then maybe nothing for a month or two. It is all whenever the mood hits me or I stumble upon something interesting. It keeps her entertained, keeps her guessing Link to post Share on other sites
jophil28 Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 Why not challenge her mind, if this is the type of girl she is? What ? I can see both of them sitting on the sofa doing Sudoku.. That should really get her hot for him . Zzzzzz Link to post Share on other sites
birdie Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 What ? I can see both of them sitting on the sofa doing Sudoku.. That should really get her hot for him . Zzzzzz your posts on this come a across a little superficial Link to post Share on other sites
jophil28 Posted October 16, 2007 Share Posted October 16, 2007 your posts on this come a across a little superficial Don't read 'em . Link to post Share on other sites
jcster Posted October 17, 2007 Share Posted October 17, 2007 your posts on this come a across a little superficial. Don't read 'em . Actually...he's not quite right..we don't like to talk about it cause we love his momma...but just don't pay him no mind. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted October 17, 2007 Share Posted October 17, 2007 . Actually...he's not quite right..we don't like to talk about it cause we love his momma...but just don't pay him no mind. Is he one of our unbathed members? Link to post Share on other sites
jcster Posted October 17, 2007 Share Posted October 17, 2007 Yes...please don't look at him...it only makes him stutter Link to post Share on other sites
reelwoman Posted October 17, 2007 Share Posted October 17, 2007 I agree that if you're thinking in terms of being a challenge or keeping her interested after a year, it doesn't sound like a very deep relationship. I would think about how you feel, what you want from the relationship. By "being a challenge" do you mean keeping her off-balance so she feels insecure about your relationship? Because that's some serious game-playing and that's not how you treat someone you care about. If by "being a challenge" you mean more that you want to keep the relationship exciting, want to keep it from getting too predictable, then maybe you could think about some activities you could do together that would be different from your routine. Sometimes that can spark some spontaneity and excitement that can recharge things when they get too humdrum. Real relationships take work and sensitivity, not games. I guess it depends on whether you want to be in a real relationship with mutual respect and compassion, or whether you just want to feel good about yourself by dominating the other person and trying to undermine her self-confidence. For me, when someone plays games or can't be real with me, I lose interest. That "man of mystery, hard to get" routine is so cliche and to me suggests a basic insecurity, not real confidence. Link to post Share on other sites
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