T-town Posted August 1, 2007 Share Posted August 1, 2007 I recently broke it off with a gorgous girl, seriously this girl is a knockout, she has a good job and owns her own house...not to shabby for somebody in their mid-20s right? Well the thing is she was just really depressed. We only dated a month or so so it wasn't anything serious, but i had to break it off with her. She seemed pretty happy sober, kind of quiet, but when she would open up she was fun. U get a few drinks in her though she turns into a wreck, balling her eyes out about how terrible things are ect...The first time i was alittle put off to say the least, but she apologized and said she just had a lot on her plate and that she really doesn't do that. I was apprehensivo but i went out with her a few more time and it happened again!! So i decided that until she is happy with herself then nobody can make her happy. I feel kind of bad cause i really do like her, I just can't put up with that every time we go out. It's weird though cause we only dated a month, she acted pretty crazy at times, I know it can't work yet for some strange reason I kind of miss her. Weird huh? Anybody else go through anything like this or know anybody like this? She has so much going for her, yet she is still just really sad. Link to post Share on other sites
NightsInWhiteSatin Posted August 1, 2007 Share Posted August 1, 2007 It's hard to know how to deal with someone who suffers from depression and it can be a bit scary and hard at times. No one can really understand it unless they've been there themselves. People who haven't normally walk away or avoid it. This doesn't help the depressed person, just makes their world seem worse. If you do care about her and want to be with her then...do a little research, be her shoulder to cry on. Might not be fun but you'll be bloody surprised at how much it'll make a difference and how much better she'll get. Then again if it's the early stages and you're not in it for the long term and arent serious about her...then maybe you're better off just to walk away. Link to post Share on other sites
Author T-town Posted August 1, 2007 Author Share Posted August 1, 2007 I wish i could be there for her and I feel terrible that i have prolly just made things worse, but the whole thing just made it so weird between us. She was embaressed for acting like that so she got even more quiet and shy and I didn't know what to think about it so there was just this weird space between us after that. I truely hope she figures out what she needs to figure, I just think it's something she needs to figure out herself unfortunately. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueEyedSarah Posted August 1, 2007 Share Posted August 1, 2007 She needs to be happy before you can date her. You did the right thing. Its not easy with someone who has depression. Especially if you do not truly understand what its like or what she is going through. Link to post Share on other sites
frezzle Posted August 1, 2007 Share Posted August 1, 2007 I used to suffer from depression myself and can tell you that she will need to sort things out alone before she can have a decent relationship with somebody else. It is a shame because this stuff might only present itself every now and again and she probably is (aside from her issues) an amazing girl. I would say you might be able to maintain some distant, platonic contact with her and, if she deals with her stuff BY HERSELF, be able to pick things up later but I imagine this would be very hard to do, as it sounds like you really fancy her and it could end up being very tempting to become more involved. Maybe just stay in contact via text or email? Link to post Share on other sites
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