BlueEyedGirl Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Would you be able to go on? And I mean if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? And be forever stuck with unrequited love/crushes and being single or forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about? I mean would you really really really be able to have a reasonably happy existance without that? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Would you be able to go on? And I mean if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? And be forever stuck with unrequited love/crushes and being single or forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about? I mean would you really really really be able to have a reasonably happy existance without that? What kind of question is that? Of course, no one needs to rely on anyone else to be happy... Everybody can be happy by themselves... I have never been soooo happy in my whole life... I am NOT in love for the first time in my life (last 5 years) and I totally enjoy every minute of my single life. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Would you be able to go on? And I mean if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? And be forever stuck with unrequited love/crushes and being single or forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about? I mean would you really really really be able to have a reasonably happy existance without that? Whoa Nellie! Not having a mutual love interest does NOT automatically subject you to misery or a life time of crushes or unrequitted love. I'm not sure how old you are but if you are well into your 20's and tend to fall in "love" often and it is usually unrequitted then you need to see a good counselor. People don't actually fall in "love" right and left. People who are looking hard for most anything don't usually find it. Despite some major family trauma, you should lead a reasonably happy existance daily. Walk into a group or a restaurant and "pretend" to be the happiest person in the whole world. So full of joy and self love and self confidence and WATCH how many people look at you and smile. You gotta have self love first, once that's attained you will become magnetic to everyone, AND having a special love interest will not be so important anymore. It'll come but please don't waste peoples time who you are not interested in, that's just ugly and its not what you want in retrun. Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Would you be able to go on? And I mean if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? And be forever stuck with unrequited love/crushes and being single or forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about? I mean would you really really really be able to have a reasonably happy existance without that? I absolutely would be able to go on. To be honest, it's going to take a special woman for me to give up being single. Maybe that's selfish, but at least I'm able to live life on my own terms and be satisfied with it. I don't think we're here necessarily to find a mutual love; we're here because we're here. All that needs to happen is one generation of humanity doing whatever it takes to ensure that another generation of humanity keeps the cycle of life going. Don't get me wrong: there's a part of me that hopes I can settle down with someone that I really appreciate one day. But if I don't find that, I don't find it. It's not the end of the world. I don't base my happiness on others. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 And be forever stuck with unrequited love/crushes and being single or forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about? Forever stuck with someone who doesn't return the love you give them??? Forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about??? Why on earth would anybody do that??? Link to post Share on other sites
jcster Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 And I mean if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? Who in the world would tell someone that...and why would you believe them?!? I also would hope that "true love" isn't the reason we're on this earth...that's just too depressing to contemplate. And, I just want to add my voice behind those of the previous posters. LOVE YOURSELF and you'll never be alone. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 I'd hope that no one would consider suicide just because they didn't have an SO.... I am 30 yrs. old and I've already faced myself with the possibility that I'll never find Mr. Right, I've already told myself it might be something I'll just have to accept, even though I want my own family more than anything and sit here and wonder why exactly I'm working my a** off in nursing school, why am I doing it when the only person it's for is me? But it's no reason to give up on life totally. I'm pretty independent with more friends than I can count and parents that love me more than anything, so I manage to love life without a special man in it....if anything keeps me going it's a small light of hope that it will happen for me.....when I'm making enough money to buy a nice house, etc, I'll be able to show it off to my friends and have parties, etc, but once they all leave it'll be like,...I'm in this big house why? Bringing home the bacon...for whom? I'm sure Ill manage to put my success to good use, as i can think of a billion things I could do alone and have a total blast with...I'll just have to learn how to ignore that big hole in my life...ugh Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Would you be able to go on? And I mean if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? And be forever stuck with unrequited love/crushes and being single or forcing yourself to be with someone you couldn't care less about? I mean would you really really really be able to have a reasonably happy existance without that? Replace that magic 8 ball, it's not being nice. Ha, This is the mind set by which I enter any potential romantic relationship. Of course you go on, that is just life. Some are lucky to have love for a lifetime, others for brief periods. Some find love in what they do. A happy existance is up to you, wheater partnered or not. Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 well Ok, of course you are all right. BUT poor blue eyed girl just posed a rheatorical question ! No need for everyone to run out and buy her a copy of " co-dependant no more" !!! Link to post Share on other sites
tom27 Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 I'd probably become an alcoholic or drug addict... lol Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 well Ok, of course you are all right. BUT poor blue eyed girl just posed a rheatorical question ! No need for everyone to run out and buy her a copy of " co-dependant no more" !!! I don't think it's THE reason we are here, I don't think anyone has ever come up with the reason for our existence...wow what a thread that would be... But if was in fact possible for someone to tell me right now, that I'll never find true love...I'd be pretty depressed...and it would cause me to start questioning why I'm here...hmmm Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 I don't think it's THE reason we are here, I don't think anyone has ever come up with the reason for our existence...wow what a thread that would be... But if was in fact possible for someone to tell me right now, that I'll never find true love...I'd be pretty depressed...and it would cause me to start questioning why I'm here...hmmm The meaning of life and the answer to everything is: 42 Now the trick is to find the question. --full credit goes to Douglas Adams, hhgg. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 The meaning of life and the answer to everything is: 42 Now the trick is to find the question. --full credit goes to Douglas Adams, hhgg. I haven't the slightest... Link to post Share on other sites
buzzie2 Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 My question to you is what makes you so certain you will never find love? Did you go to see a psychic and that's what they told you? Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 I'm not certain I'll never find it, but afraid to be optimistic because that might make disappointment harder to handle...I prefer to just have acceptance of a big possibility... Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 I'm not certain I'll never find it, but afraid to be optimistic because that might make disappointment harder to handle...I prefer to just have acceptance of a big possibility... That is a healthy outlook. For some (and I have been here) it is just easier to resolve yourself to being alone. I guess it kind of makes it your decision that way. In our alone times instead of being beaten down by failure and use it as an excuse to give up. It is much heathier to live your life the best you can and hope for the best. btw...my 42 reference was from a fairly popular book. Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. I recommend it as it is just whimiscal funny. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 well Ok, of course you are all right. BUT poor blue eyed girl just posed a rheatorical question ! No need for everyone to run out and buy her a copy of " co-dependant no more" !!! The questions were so dramatically and unrealistically couched. It made me want to quietly sob while placing the back of my wrist on my forehead... If it turns out that I'm alone for the rest of my existence, oh well. At least I can vacation where I want to, without taking anyone else's preference into consideration. If a friend wants to join me, he/she can. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 That is a healthy outlook. For some (and I have been here) it is just easier to resolve yourself to being alone. I guess it kind of makes it your decision that way. In our alone times instead of being beaten down by failure and use it as an excuse to give up. It is much heathier to live your life the best you can and hope for the best. btw...my 42 reference was from a fairly popular book. Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. I recommend it as it is just whimiscal funny. Thanks for the info...yea I figured if alone is what I"m going to be forever...might as well get used to it now...instead of having this expectation that it will just end one day..."Hope for the best...expect the worst..." Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Thanks for the info...yea I figured if alone is what I"m going to be forever...might as well get used to it now...instead of having this expectation that it will just end one day..."Hope for the best...expect the worst..." Of course you realize that once you get to this mindset, the men will be everywhere. watch out. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytellan Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 if someone told you that never in your life will you experience mutual (true) love, the reason we are all here after all? Umm... did I miss something... again? Why didn't someone tell me I wasn't supposed to already feel this way??? I guess I jumped the gun and bypassed all of the "downward spiral" crap and skipped straight to the dramatic realization that this was the case. I was never good at reading mystery novels for the same reason. Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Well, I guess I feel that I would rather be alone than with the wrong person. I suggest getting a dachshund. My current life partner is a smart, sassy overweight weiner dog, that in our six years together has never let me down once. I wake up with her little head on my shoulder and think " eh, well, love and partnerships come in all shapes and sizes" ! Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Of course you realize that once you get to this mindset, the men will be everywhere. watch out. Doubt that! Link to post Share on other sites
electric_sheep Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 we're here because we're here. That's the truest thing I've read all day, and I think I'll include it amongst my favorite pearls of wisdom, along side "no one thing is better than any other thing". Link to post Share on other sites
electric_sheep Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Well, I guess I feel that I would rather be alone than with the wrong person. I seriously question this idealized notion of a lifetime "wrong" person or "right" person. Could be the right person for us today might be the wrong person for us tomorrow, or vice versa. Once you've figured out they are the wrong person for you "right now", then, of course, it's best to go your separate ways. It never seems to be that simple though... usually they are quite right in a few ways, not as right in some other ways, and downright wrong in a couple of ways, making the whole damn thing impossible. That's why I just try and lighten up and enjoy myself. It's unfortunate that we are not "allowed" to look for someone "more right" for us while we are with someone else. Jealousy is just too real a thing, I suppose. Love can be oddly selfish at times. After all, if you really loved someone, wouldn't you want them to be with the person who is the "most right" for them? Even if that person is not yourself. I've often thought that the intensity of my jealousy is directly proportional to how in love I am. If you ever find yourself with a partner, and you're not even the slightest bit jealous, then I think something might be wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted July 30, 2007 Share Posted July 30, 2007 Oh, I completely agree that there is no ONE person, or perfectly right soulmate person ! I just meant that sometimes I stayed with people who were'nt right for me at that time ( and who were F*cking alcohlic abusive *******s !!!) when....I would have been better off alone. Right now, my life isn't exciting but It's very peaceful ! I watch what I want on TV and don't have to share the ben and jerry's ! Nobody is drunkenly raging at me or blaming their crappy life on me ! Link to post Share on other sites
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