Too skinny

[kittensmittens]

I would like to know if there are any guys who actually find skinny women attractive. I'm really self-conscious about being really skinny (5'7" 100lbs). I don't have an eating problem, I just have a very thin frame and a high metabolism. And to top it off, I'm not "well-endowed". I think I'm pretty enough.....people have even told me I should be a model.....but I still feel freakish!

 

Today, my mom told me I need to eat more b/c "men don't like skinny women". WTF?!? I think that's a horrible thing to tell your daughter, especially when you know that she's already self conscious about it, you know that she eats a healthy, well balanced diet, she gets it from you in the first place, AND she's just been DUMPED. I've already worked hard at building a defense against comments/insults from other people (even friends who are "just kidding around"). So now, I'm just feeling extra crappy. I'm not sure yet if I'm going to go back to my bf....but I know I can't really deal w/ dating other men yet. He's the only one who made me feel like I was absolutely PERFECT.....not just "no you're not skinny"....but made me feel like I was exceptionally beautiful, graceful, elegant just as I am. Who knows if it was real though....probably wasn't since so much other crap that came out of his mouth wasn't even true.

 

I know looks fade and a person should love you most for what's on the inside, etc. But I want whoever loves me to at least inintially think I'm the hottest thing on the planet....not loving me, but secretly wishing I was a little more plump. I don't want anyone to settle for me. I dunno....I know that not everyone is a beauty queen....and a person's personality and confidence often can make them more beautiful.....but I'm speaking strictly about sexual attraction. And in case you haven't picked up on it yet....I don't have much confidence lately!

 

I don't want anyone to tell me, "sure, there are men who think skinny is hot" if it's not even really true. I also would like to know if there really and truly ARE men out there who prefer smaller busted women (who are also skinny...). My bf and one other guy that I knew who had a mad crush on me both told me they "didn't like big boobs". Right. Well turns out my bf didn't really care either way, and the other guy....who even knows. I realize I could have dated a complete ******* who asked me 5X a day to get a boob job.....but still. It left me feeling like he settled for me and I don't ever want to feel that way again. Sorry....I'm kinda pessimistic and pissy right now.....I just feel really crappy.

[dbtmarley]

White guys like skinny women.... if it is a black man you are after you better put on some #'s..

[Turquoise Waters]

Honestly, you are definitely seriously underweight for your height. I will leave it at that, as far as being healthy.

As far as what other people think about your body.....who cares what other people think? Don't take other people's comments to heart. I am 5'7 and 130 pounds and people actually tell ME I could gain a few pounds. However I am within the healthy weight range, and I like how I look in clothes.

You can decide what you want to do about gaining weight, but really, it doesn't matter what other people think, you will find a man who will love you how you are. This board tends to focus a lot on the importance of physical attributes in a relationship, and in this sense, LS is really unrealistic and unhealthy for people's self-esteem.

[Turquoise Waters]

White guys like skinny women.... if it is a black man you are after you better put on some #'s..

 

Yep, another LS racial generalization/stereotype meant to be taken as serious advice!

[sofakingmad]

being fairly lean myself i personally prefer "skinny" women. i'm 5'5" and 125 but i have dated all shapes and sizes and my ex is taller and weighs more than me. as far as boob size eh doesn't matter to me i actually prefer smaller.

[dbtmarley]

Yep, another LS racial generalization/stereotype meant to be taken as serious advice!

 

Truth hurts huh?

[D&L]

Of course there are men that like skinny women, you just have to find them, just like there are men who like bigger women. It all goes by what a person prefers and what they like. Everyone is self conscience about at least some part of their body or how they are. Some, like you, think they are too skinny, some feel too fat, some too dark, some too pale etc. You have to love yourself for who you are and except yourself for who you are,and when you do, that is the only way you can expect others to do the same.

 

AND YOU SHOULD NEVER LOOK TOWARDS A MAN FOR VALIDATION!! Ofcourse it feels great when a man thinks you are beautiful, it means alot. But have you ever noticed that even if a man tells you that you are beautiful, you seem to still be unhappy about your looks? Im telling you, it starts from inside, make sure you love yourself first and then look for the love from others.

 

I do thhink that you are a underweight for your height and it may be unhealthy. A healthy weight range for you is 125 - 155 pounds. Ofcourse this is not always accurate because it doesnt take into account muscle and fat but for one you are skinny, and Im guessing not too much muscle so this is basically around where you should be. My main advicethough is to love yourself for who you are.

[sofakingmad]

^ well said.

[Turquoise Waters]

Truth hurts huh?

No, it doesn't hurt at all, but it's not "truth." If you saw the Real World Las Vegas, the two black females were very thin and got tons of guy interest, Dalton ended up with the one skinny black female and they stayed together a long time. Broken up now, though.

[dbtmarley]

Dalton? You must mean Alton.. The one girl did not get any play by the way and the one Alton was with dated nothing but white men before him, under her own admission.

 

Besides, Alton does not count as a black man. He is what you call an Oreo. Black on the outside, but white in the middle!

[Turquoise Waters]

Dalton? You must mean Alton.. The one girl did not get any play by the way and the one Alton was with dated nothing but white men before him, under her own admission.

 

Besides, Alton does not count as a black man. He is what you call an Oreo. Black on the outside, but white in the middle!

 

OK, I am laughing now. Thanks for the education.

[directx]

You know, for me, the physcial infatuation is the first thing that keeps me interested, but a woman has to have something upstairs in her head for me to play with too.

Its hard to say if your skinny, because honestly each person is different in how they carry themselves and you would have to be seen.

I think I am too fat, but practically everyone else thinks I am fine.

To shut your mother up, go see a doctor and if the Dr. thinks your weight is fine, nothing more needs to be said.

 

In general, i think some women put too much focus on their looks and not enough on being attractive mentally. But who can blame women mostly because look at what people are badgered with media wise.

[sofakingmad]

No, it doesn't hurt at all, but it's not "truth." If you saw the Real World Las Vegas, the two black females were very thin and got tons of guy interest, Dalton ended up with the one skinny black female and they stayed together a long time. Broken up now, though.

 

so real world las vegas is the truth. hmmm ok.

[zilverenvlinder]

I say, just wear heels all the time and you'll look like a supermodel. ;-)

[Trialbyfire]

Being fat or skinny is subjective. Being healthy is not. If you're healthy, who cares. There are clothes designed to flatter all figures. Find the styles that look great on you and revel in the fact that you don't have cellulite.

[Touche]

Being fat or skinny is subjective. Being healthy is not. If you're healthy, who cares. There are clothes designed to flatter all figures. Find the styles that look great on you and revel in the fact that you don't have cellulite.

 

Ha, ha! Skinny people CAN have cellulite. Yes, I'm probably as underweight as Kitten is and have a little cellulite on upper thighs. It's weird because it's only visible if I'm sitting down.

 

Anyway, Kitten, don't worry about it. I've never had a problem finding dates when I was single. Been underweight my entire life.

 

My H prefers petite women and so have any of my boyfriends, obviously.

 

Just to give a little hint as to how underweight I am, I weighed 122 or 123 pounds when I was 9 months pregnant. Can you believe that? All the nurses used to tease me at my weigh ins. My co-workers teased me too because I still wore belts when I was pregnant. But our son weighed in at a healthy 6 lbs 14 oz when he was born. He was very healthy. No problems at all with the pregnancy.

 

Some of us are just naturally thin.

 

Now, in 2005 I did go on a diet and gained 10 lbs. Unfortunately, I've lost it all. We went through selling our house, a big move and I've been helping my husband start a new practice in our new town...lots of changes in my life and I've now lost the 10 lbs that took me 4 months to gain...ugh. I have to start all over again.

 

Please don't think that a man won't find you desirable though. Tha's ridiculous. My mother used to tell me the same thing too. It's bull. Be proud of who you are.

[Trialbyfire]

Ha, ha! Skinny people CAN have cellulite. Yes, I'm probably as underweight as Kitten is and have a little cellulite on upper thighs. It's weird because it's only visible if I'm sitting down.

Oh fine, kill my theory and optimism.

 

I'm not as thin as the two of you but am considered on the thin side too, not busty like a DD but reasonable. There are clothes that look good on me and others that need a little filler.

[McFadden]

I used to be about as underweight as the OP in high school (5'8 110) and now I'm still pretty thin and the only people who have insulted my weight or said I should gain weight are other women who are not as thin as me, figure that one out.

[Touche]

I used to be about as underweight as the OP in high school (5'8 110) and now I'm still pretty thin and the only people who have insulted my weight or said I should gain weight are other women who are not as thin as me, figure that one out.

 

:laugh:Ain't that the truth, McFadden. SO true. Men have never said I need to gain weight. Although now my H is because he liked me better physically when I gained those 10 pounds...so did I for that matter. But it sure doesn't stop him from getting turned on to me anyway...no matter what my weight is he's "up" for anything.

 

Ha ha, TBF! Sorry to burst your bubble on the cellulite thing...like you have anything to worry about. I'd trade my body for yours in a heartbeat! (Although I DO have boobs.) I just can't stand my skinny arms and legs. Ugh.

[Trialbyfire]

Hey Touché, that's cause you saw my best side forward...

[Touche]

Hey Touché, that's cause you saw my best side forward...

 

Oh please, who are you kidding?

 

Anyway, where's the OP? Get your skinny ass back here!

[Trialbyfire]

Oh please, who are you kidding?

I was making fun of the potential avie I showed to you.

[halfarock]

I love thin women. My current and past girlfriends have been, as I remember, 5’5” 110-120; 5’2” 105; 5’7” 110-115; 5’4” 110, you get the idea. Kittensmittens, as you will read, I really do love skinny women, but you know you really are pushing the limits.

 

When I look at a skinny woman I see someone whose lines are simplified, direct; the movement of her bones and muscle evident in her motions. With heavier women all you get is a general movement of mass. It’s not nearly as well defined. Anything that jiggles is not appealing to me. Thin small-breasted women tend to have well formed breasts that hold up well over the years. A thin, small-breasted woman in motion is like a beautiful dance, an enchanting dance, poetry in motion. Heavier women are like sluggish blobs in comparison.

 

When a skinny woman gets passionate, either through pleasure or anger, as the tension rises and falls you can see it ripple through her frame, through her muscles. It is really quite endearing.

 

There is a considerable difference in personality and activities of skinny women compared to other women and it is in account of their weight. Skinny women don’t sit on the couch and eat potato chips. They go out for walks. Weight is a consequence between the amount of food that we take in and what we do to burn off that food. Metabolism has nothing to do with it. A larger person has to have a much larger metabolism to just maintain their larger bodies. Skinny people have much less to metabolize. It is a simple equation; skinny people eat less and do more. That is, skinny people are livelier over a greater part of the day. There is a lifestyle difference compared to other women.

 

This leads us to sex. Trying not to get into too many details, but it is easy and fun to carry a skinny woman over the threshold, each end every night. Some women like it when a man can pick her up and throw her around in bed, lift her into position… There is a lot more that you can do with a skinny woman. They also tend to have a great deal of energy and can continue on for hours at a time, whenever the mood arises. Plus, penetration is greater as there is no fat to hold you back.

 

Ever so often I run into a woman, who has large breasts and has an attitude as if to say, “hey I got big boobs so you have to like me”. They tend to be in the chunky side. I never encounter this type of attitude from a skinny woman. I don’t know why it is but thin women tend to be more willing to engage with me mentally, intellectually, philosophically. It has a lot to do with the way they face the world, as a skinny woman.

[electric_sheep]

Ha, ha! Skinny people CAN have cellulite. Yes, I'm probably as underweight as Kitten is and have a little cellulite on upper thighs. It's weird because it's only visible if I'm sitting down.

 

Yeah, you can be skinny and fat, in a way. That is, your skinny but not muscular, and what there is of you is fat. If that makes sense?

 

Also, many people who ever gained weight at one point in their lifes, then lost it, often have weird "remnants" left over, like bat wings (flappy arm skin), or cellulite butts, or whatever. You can't really control where your body stores it's fat, or where it takes it off if you are working out (spot reduction is another myth). Where it stores it and where it takes it off is largely genetic.

 

Another thing... "low" and "high" metabolisms are also a myth. The resting metabolism of a person is more or less only dependant on their lean body mass. There isn't even a difference between older people and younger, or male or female. Young men have higher metabolisms precisely because they have more lean body mass. As people age their hormonal environment changes, making it harder for them to build up muscle, and they (usually) become sedentary, and hence drop lean body mass, and hence their metabolism changes. The difference between men and women is also attributed to differences in muscle mass.

 

So, this girl is either just not a big eater, or else she keeps herself really busy and burns calories by actually doing stuff. Your total metabolism, of course, is the combo of your resting metabolism and what you burn via activities. Even fidgeting in a chair or shaking your knees up and down burns a surprising amount of calories, believe it or not. That's probably why these "nervous" types are often skinny.

[electric_sheep]

I used to be about as underweight as the OP in high school (5'8 110) and now I'm still pretty thin and the only people who have insulted my weight or said I should gain weight are other women who are not as thin as me, figure that one out.

 

My thin mom says she gets dirty looks from other women all the time. I think there is actually some backlash (fueled by jealousy?) against skinny people nowadays.

 

Anyway, to the OP... I know you say you don't have an eating disorder, but the fact that you seem to be basing your weight on what you think guys will find hot seems like a red flag to me.

 

I mean, I'm a guy, so the idea of thinking about my weight in the context of what I think women will find hot seems totally alien to me. I know a lot of women think this way, though, and honesty I think a lot of women have borderline eating disorders. Not full blown, but borderline. Whether it be trying to be super skinny, or the flip side, eating to fill emotional needs, etc... There is a lot of complicated stuff surrounding women, food, and weight. Of course, it's hardly womens fault. It's been fueled by this societal idea that looks are the most important thing to a women. I think men and woman are both to blame at this point, though men probably started it.

 

Anyway, I just encourage you to be careful and try not and worry about it so much. I'm thin, but I'm just "naturally" thin, in the sense that I am thin from just "being myself". I'm active. I try and eat healthy. I don't have a weird relationship with food. It's something I enjoy, but I've never obsessed over it. That's the way to be. Be yourself, and just let your weight fall where it does. So long as that isn't way out of bounds on one side or the other, don't worry about it.