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Old 11th April 2019, 7:28 AM   #1
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Making friends

For the past 6 years I have used meetup.com to make friends. Whilst at the beginning I met some great people they have moved on and got married, had families etc and don't come anymore. Even when I do see these friends I feel they are not authentic and hide a lot of their life away whereas my long time friends and I always share the good and bad times.

Meetup seems to have changed and the people that go now have severe mental health issues, insecure and needy or use it as a dating site and hurt people in the process. I do have friends I met before meetup but would like to meet some more people. Where can I meet people without using meetup? It would be nice to meet a man too but I find it hard at meetup as I am unable to make new connections when past dates are there watching.
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Old 11th April 2019, 9:10 AM   #2
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You can meet people through shared interests. As an adult I met my closest friends 1). doing a summer share in a house by the beach; 2). through a women's business group; 3). through a sorority alumnae group; 4). at a book club in my church; and 5). volunteering through a civic charitable organization.

It seems for me the routine of seeing the same people over & over, preferably every week, but at least every month helped forge the friendship. The friendships also deepened when I reached out to specific individuals & invited them to do something with me outside of the organization.
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Old 11th April 2019, 9:18 AM   #3
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Sure take a class, join a hiking group, take up golf, etc., whatever your interests are just do it. Something like this would be better than a meet up group to me. Let me ask you, why would you end your friendships just because they have gotten married and are now mated? When I was single I still saw my girlfriends who were married. Friendships don't end because people get married.
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Old 11th April 2019, 9:47 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stillafool View Post
Let me ask you, why would you end your friendships just because they have gotten married and are now mated?
I didn't want the friendships to end but they always have an excuse and it usually is they are spending time with their husbands. Most of the married ones went to meet a spouse at meetup so I don't think they were genuinely investing in friendships anyway. I do still make an effort with others though.
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