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Is he worth my time?


Tagalz

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Hey!

 

Happy new year to everone!

 

My friend Alex said he’s coming to my party but before it started he said this: «I don’t feel good so I’m not sure if I’m coming»

 

Now that the party is already on I do miss having a good friend around. He’s not a fake friend but I think he’s just not a good one. Also It might be true that he don’t feel good. Hard to tell though

 

Do you agree?

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Do we agree with what? You haven't told us anything other than your friend said he didn't feel well and opted not to go to your party. Do you really expect us to know what is going on with your friendship based on that tiny bit of info?

 

As an aside I woke up sick yesterday and decided to just stay home too. I hope nobody thinks I'm a fake just because I want to take care of myself.

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Hey!

 

I know this is late, but I was hosting a party at new year and it went out of control.

 

Lilly lied to me when she said that 2 guys and 2 girl are coming. She took a whole group of more than 15 people. They were giving threats to people and stealing things like a purse from a girl, my perfume and chocolate bars, and even some of my t-shirt. I did almost had a fight with them

 

So my good friend Alex was not sure if he wanted to come before the party started. He said that he don't feel good but will give me a call if he feels better.

 

So he tried calling me like 6 times and I didn't answer. He also sent me a text where it says "You son of a B****" I eventually took up and he asked what the address is. I said you have been to my place before you know where I live I can't talk right now.

 

When he got to the party he was mad. He said come let's talk outside.

 

I said "Sorry I didn't gave you the address, I was too busy fixing up the drama"

 

then he replied "You could atleast say it. That doesn't take much of your time"

 

I said sorry like 2 times and he didn't reply back with it's okay or something. So he clearly doesn't forget that. I think too much about that because I was being a bad friend and I don't want him to leave me.

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Your friend is being ridiculous. You were the host of a party. He should have confirmed the address before not got all whiney when you didn't respond right away. You had hosting responsibilities.

 

The guests stealing does say something about your taste in friends though.

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Your friend is being ridiculous. You were the host of a party. He should have confirmed the address before not got all whiney when you didn't respond right away. You had hosting responsibilities.

 

The guests stealing does say something about your taste in friends though.

 

Well I hope he can forgive me because both me and him got a point that's how I see it. I just thought it was weird asking for the address when he has been to my place before. My fault is to not saying it.

 

Yeah but one thing you don't know is that I posted my party on social media, so I was aware that people that I don't know were coming. But I was not expecting 30+ people. It got so overcrowded that some people even "chilled" in the hallway. I had control at first, but then I got distracted. I wanted to know everybody and I did actually have a good time until Lilly ruined it. I hope karma get's her cause she's not a good person

 

But as of most parties when there is a lot of people who don't know each other something is bound to happened. That is unlikely to avoid unless you have a long conversation like I had with lilly's guy friend. I almost got a fight with them. They eventually took off when the party was over.

 

I don't really think much about it now because I already knew what went wrong. I need to have more control next time like having a good friend to stand by the door to not let uninvited people in. Or that I don't invite people like Lilly or I don't post it on social media

Edited by Tagalz
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You were the host of a party.

 

Besides all that drama I got 12 girls on snapchat :p

 

Now they see me as the fun guy that «hosts parties» hahha

 

Do you think I have a chance to hang out with them besides just partying?

Or maybe they reject me and only say yes to come to my party?

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  • 4 weeks later...
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Hey!

 

My friend said «Are you Mr.Bean?» which he compared me to him. At first I took it as a joke and I said it’s good because I’m funny. Then he clapped he’s hand and said yes. But at the same time I did not like it and I was quiet for a long time after. It was my way of telling him that this joke was not okay

 

But on a second tought this might be a stick towards me because it’s he’s way to say I’m weird in a lowkey way. Me knowing myself I’m not funny and I can’t see the differnce if he’s joking or not.

 

What do you readers think?

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What happened that prompted him to make that comment?

 

Well it could be that he was making fun of my appearance or how I look? I could not think of any other reasons. It seems weird that all of a sudden he just said that.

 

I took it as a joke because I'm good friends with him and I didn't think he had intention to say something like that. It's too late know but If he does that again I'm just going to say stop it or else I will not be your friend anymore.

 

If he asks why then I use this as an example.

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So, he just said it out of the blue? Well, you know, sometimes our friends can be our mirrors to how the world sees us. He was most likely trying to tell you something constructive in a way that didn’t hurt you. I wouldn’t be touchy if I were you.

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CautiouslyOptimistic

Where were you when he said this? What were you doing? What were you talking about? What do you look like and what were you wearing? We need more info.....

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Where were you when he said this? What were you doing? What were you talking about? What do you look like and what were you wearing? We need more info.....

 

We were on our way to the grocery store and we just went to different shops to look at the sales. We were talking about our time in high school.

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So, he just said it out of the blue? Well, you know, sometimes our friends can be our mirrors to how the world sees us. He was most likely trying to tell you something constructive in a way that didn’t hurt you. I wouldn’t be touchy if I were you.

 

Yes he just said that out of the blue :)

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talgaz, i think you ought to ask him! and then let him know it made you uncomfortable.

 

i also think you are making something grow larger out of nothing meant in a harmful or malicious way and over thinking things way too much.

 

and i also question whether your esteem is or was a bit low or was low on that day.

 

i dont think it is too late for you to talk to the freind!!!!!! because i feel you need to learn to communicate a little more honestly at the time with folks and that way you wont be left feeling uncomfortable.

 

there are many worse things that people face verbally or physically in life (you only have to look in the papers to figure that one out,) so if you are someone who is easilly hurt or unsure what others say, then you need to sort things out more if you are feeling insecure with it all and then hopefully you will be able to get things like this into a proper persepctive!

 

maxi.

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Hey!

 

I don’t have alot of friend since I had to cut ties with most of them that I tought was my friend but many of them was fake. I only have one friend left but I’m starting to questioning if he’s really a good one or not?

 

We have had 2-3 minor arguments but it’s not a big deal because it’s normal. Friends have arguments and they get back to each other.

 

Most recently as you can read on my thread is that he compared me to mr.bean and I did not took that joke very well. Most of the advice I got was not to think much but he’s also not serious when meeting up.

 

Yesterday we planned to go on a gaming event which is today, but he said that he was exhausted after coming home and I said sure just rest and have a nice day.

 

A hour later he said this: «Hey are you still there? Maybe I’m coming»

 

Now I’m wondering is he really exhausted or not? He’s not serious.

 

Also! he got mad at me for not answering my phone the other day. I sent him a message and said I call you later I’m busy. He’s opinion is that I could answer because he was not going to talk much... like wtf dude he could sent me a message on snapchat lol

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Hey!

 

Yesterday we planned to go on a gaming event which is today, but he said that he was exhausted after coming home and I said sure just rest and have a nice day.

 

A hour later he said this: «Hey are you still there? Maybe I’m coming»

 

Now I’m wondering is he really exhausted or not? He’s not serious.

 

I'm overthinking way too much. I need to calm down.

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Hey, I think you are good. What you've mentioned seems like pretty normal stuff between friends.

 

As to the Mr. Bean comment - I'm a woman, but I've heard guy friends say things to each other that seemed pretty mean to me, but they were truly just joking with each other. My xH told me one time it's just what guys do.

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Hey again lol! :D

 

Okay forget these other threads that I’ve posted of me overthinking but this might be a good thing to consider. I will explain.

 

Usually it’s only me that initiate contact and ask him to hang out. It’s almost never him that asks so that left me wondering is he really worth my time? Is he really interested?

 

Therefore I’m going to test him. He knows my schedule meaning he knowns my working days and when I have a day off. So I’m not going to contact him for about 2-3 weeks and see if he asks me.

 

If he doesn’t then I will not contact him anymore. What do you readers think? :)

Edited by Tagalz
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That's a good idea. You will find out if he cares any. Also, you will keep a habit from developing where it's always you who has to initiate. Give him that space and see if he initiates. If he does, that's what you want, so be sure and be bright and happy about it (but not gushing and grateful) and say something to reward him, like, "What a good idea. Thanks for asking." In other words, the basic reward good behavior, don't give attention when it's bad.

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Hey!

 

A late update!

 

He called me few days ago and was asking me what I've been up to lately. We had conversation about football but no more than that. He asked me when I have a day off and I said sunday so he said cool let's go and hangout.

 

I said no because all the shops are closed and we just end up freezing outside. When I asked him to come over to my place to play games he was like no it's boring there. We ended up with agreeing not to meet on sunday.

 

Then he asked me when is your next day off after sunday. I said this wednesday. If he's not contacting me then I wait 1 more week and then the test is over

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Mrs._December

Is this some kind of supposed friendship that you're 'testing' for some odd reason?

 

If it is, it just sounds awful on both counts.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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