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[UPDATE]How do I tell my roommate, an elderly lady, she eventually needs to move out.


Friendship Having issues with a friend? Get it off your chest!

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Old 8th February 2018, 7:50 AM   #46
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That means she must have looked at a place.
This is worse than a codependent watching or counting the number of drinks an Alcoholic drinks in a night.

You don't know she looked at a place and if she can even get it or has leased it.

I would make sure you are ready to have to evict her, start by going to the county and find out how you do that.. because I think unless she has a sudden conscience you are going to have to throw her out with a court order.
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Old 8th February 2018, 1:36 PM   #47
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Once she moves out (if she actually does) take a break from her. She relies on you too much and she really isn't your problem. The friendship won't be the same, you have built up resentment towards her and imagine her coming to visit and then wanting to spend the night? That puts you in a weird spot.

Does she have other friends or even family members to help her out?

AC is right, she's using you and has no intention of moving out. Find out the laws and talk to a lawyer too.
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Old 8th February 2018, 2:15 PM   #48
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In AZ it does not take 6 months to evict. Az is a pro landlord state and she also lives with me so no Judge is going to let her stay. I do believe once I get an order of eviction she has to move within 5 days.

I also can make it very inconvenient for her. I will take away her internet and her garage parking and make my property no smoking. She cannot stay in n the house without internet since she does nothing but stream and her smart phone is so old she cannot even barely use the internet o it.


Iím going to start collecting boxes for her.

She has a daughter in CA and 1 friend out here a very wealthy family. They can loan her some money or put her up someplace if they want.



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Originally Posted by whichwayisup View Post
Once she moves out (if she actually does) take



a break from her. She relies on you too much and she really isn't your problem. The friendship won't be the same, you have built up resentment towards her and imagine her coming to visit and then wanting to spend the night? That puts you in a weird spot.

Does she have other friends or even family members to help her out?

AC is right, she's using you and has no intention of moving out. Find out the laws and talk to a lawyer too.
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Old 10th February 2018, 3:08 AM   #49
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I also can make it very inconvenient for her. I will take away her internet and her garage parking and make my property no smoking.
Look into something called constructive eviction. This usually applies to the landlord turning off heat/water in order to "make it very inconvenient" for the tenant so they move out. I don't know if taking away the internet/garage or banning smoking would apply. I can see there being an argument made that these are things she's been paying for so she has a right to them as long as she's still a paying tenant, which she is.

Personally, I think doing this would be kind of a dick move, on your part. I know you're frustrated and want her out ASAP, but you've been letting this go on for months now. A lot of your frustrations are of your own making. I don't think you should start punishing her for simply existing in a home she's still allowed to live in.
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Old 10th February 2018, 3:29 AM   #50
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I agree with the above poster ^^^
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Old 10th February 2018, 8:17 AM   #51
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In AZ it does not take 6 months to evict. Az is a pro landlord state and she also lives with me so no Judge is going to let her stay. I do believe once I get an order of eviction she has to move within 5 days.
So is Georgia and it can take 6 months to get someone out that knows the system...

Tenants have rights too, they call them Tenant Defenses..

You might want to read up on what your road will be like if she decides to fight the eviction..

https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclope...s-arizona.html

Pay attention to Tenant Defenses...

I have quite a bit of rental property myself and on one occasion we let an employees family live rent free for a few months and then we asked them to leave and they refused.
It took us months to get them out and could have taken 6 months if they had kept fighting the eviction.

The cool thing is you have to go down to the courthouse and file things, they get to file disputes thru the internet, making it harder on you and easier for them.

In the end you will evict her but she can delay it quite a while if she chooses to fight you..

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 10th February 2018 at 8:20 AM..
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Old 10th February 2018, 8:34 AM   #52
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BTW, I'm talking about someone who knows how to work the system.. if she doesn't you can get her out in under 30 days...

In Georgia every time a dispute or counter is filed the opposing party gets 30 days to respond, in Arizona the time frame is shorter so the eviction cycle will be faster.. but it is up to you to start that cycle.
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Old 10th February 2018, 8:37 AM   #53
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Look into something called constructive eviction.
In Arizona that is specifically prohibited and comes with it's own punishment, up to the value of 2 months rent to be paid to the renter.
They call those self help procedures and those aren't allowed

She also cannot change locks or anything else that prohibits her renter from access to the property
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Old 10th February 2018, 10:04 AM   #54
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Iím pretty sure constructive eviction is illegal o wouldnít do it anyways.

She doesnít know the system but I also have asthma and allergies and my garage smells like smoke so I will tell her no smoking.

I think sheís mad at me. Yesterday I worked all day and had a meeting after work and didnít get here me yesterday until 7. She walked from out back to her room and kinda gave me a half heated hello.

Iím gling to start collecting moving boxes.
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Old 10th February 2018, 11:33 PM   #55
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well considering the circumstances I do think that the friendship will probably be over, since you are basically throwing her out at this point, but it is fair since it is your house.

Have you told her about the older potential roommate you mentioned?
It might make her feel better to know that she can move out with another person that can help cover the rent. (you mentioned you rented to her at a discount)
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Old 11th February 2018, 12:35 PM   #56
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I have no choice but to “ throw” her out since she won’t leave otherwise. I’ve been more than fair and patient. I gave her several months notice and even totally waived rent for Jan.

She asked me last night about my letter and was confused if she had to be out by feb 28 or mar 3. I said mar 3 since she gets her SS. I asked her if she wanted boxes and she said yes. She actually just left the house which she never does this early. Of course she could just be going to corner store for smokes. I have given her names and numbers of 2 older ladies that are looking for roomMates. I know she talked to at least 1. I’m going to help her with boxes.

I’m sure she knows my patience has run out. I’m so done with having someone in my house 22/7

I’ll keep you all posted.




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well considering the circumstances I do think that the friendship will probably be over, since you are basically throwing her out at this point, but it is fair since it is your house.

Have you told her about the older potential roommate you mentioned?
It might make her feel better to know that she can move out with another person that can help cover the rent. (you mentioned you rented to her at a discount)

Last edited by Purrrfect; 11th February 2018 at 12:43 PM..
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Old 13th February 2018, 1:12 AM   #57
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I’m pretty sure constructive eviction is illegal o wouldn’t do it anyways.

She doesn’t know the system but I also have asthma and allergies and my garage smells like smoke so I will tell her no smoking.
Right, I wasn't suggesting you do anything like this. I was suggesting that cutting access to her internet or the garage, or even banning smoking, might be some form of constructive eviction. So before you do that, make sure you're not breaking any laws.
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Old 13th February 2018, 1:35 PM   #58
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Internet and garage is getting cut off starting 3/3.

Iíll keep you all posted



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Right, I wasn't suggesting you do anything like this. I was suggesting that cutting access to her internet or the garage, or even banning smoking, might be some form of constructive eviction. So before you do that, make sure you're not breaking any laws.
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Old 15th February 2018, 12:09 AM   #59
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Ok so sheís looking but appears to have had another hiccup.

She contacted both names I gave her. One was an older semi retired coworker of my sisters. This womanís house and personal life was a total mess. Roomie chatted with her for a while because she felt sorry for her bit house in total disrepair ancwoman has crack head daughter and BF who come over all the time.

She was supposed to see a second place tmrw with this woman I found for her on CL. Well the woman texted her today saying sheís decided to move so room no longer avail. I see The woman removed her ad. She said she has called and emailed dozens of people and her email an her email has been hacked and she gets scams or perverts most of the time. Well itís Craigís list what do you expect.

I told her she should be looking at apartments then because sheís running out of Time. She told me she didnít want to be locked into any lease because she really doesnt want to stay out here. I told her she may not have much of a choice because sheís running out of time. I then had to leave to take my son to practice.

Iím tired of going back and forth with her. Iím going to reiterate again if it comes up this arrangement does not work for me and she knows she has to leave by the 3rd.

So this is where we are at.
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Old 18th February 2018, 4:01 PM   #60
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She just left to look at 2 rooms today. One is a lady who lives 2 blocks away in the large subdivision across the street. They both are from NY. Itís s shared bathroom and the other woman is also a smoker. There will be 3 adult females living in the house. She has high hopes this will work.

We had a long chat yesterday and I threw in there spring break starts March 5 and Iím taking a couple days off to get some stuff done around here and I need her room emptied and my garage space back. She said she plans on being totally moved out by sat March 3 and have some faith in her. She did ask for help in getting a truck to move her bed. Apart from that she can move everything else in a few trips in her car.

She said this woman is ok with the fact she works a lot from home. Great. I certainly am not a fan of it.

Itís getting close!
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