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What can I do about this friendship?


nattynatbrat

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Already know this might not make any sense and will be long but here it goes..RANT: So there is this one girl that I used to be close friends with. I noticed that I would be the one to always rant about my problems to her but I barely ever heard anything about her issues. Even when she was once close to telling me. Since she was the only friend I had for a while, I still would rant to her. We stopped talking for about 6 months one time over a disagreement when I called her out on pretending to be someone's best friend, but the other person still believed them. Later on, they noticed that I was the one telling the truth. Anyway, we made up. Few months later...maybe 10...we completely stopped talking. Not for a bad reason, though. We just didn't communicate once college began. One day on Snapchat I noticed that she had unfollowed me, so I did the same thing. On twitter she was tweeting indirectly about how people think she unfollowed them but really it was her account and she's laughing at them...already knew it was me and the other girl I mentioned earlier that she was talking about. We resolved that as well, though. A few months ago, my mother passed. The next day, the girl messaged me saying "Hey I just heard about your mom, I'm sooo sorry. I can't even imagine what your going through. I know we're not that close but you don't have to go through anything by yourself so if you need anything, at all, someone to talk too, or hang out with I'm here." I took her word for it and wanted to hang out to take my mind off things. When the time came, she cancelled last minute. When we finally met up, the vibe was weird. It's like we had nothing in common anymore. Whether our major in college, our interests, the fact that HER mom isn't dead, or even the kind of people we hang around. Anyway, after reflecting I noticed that I seem to get really jealous of her easily. I get jealous of how her mom is alive and how she tweets that she doesn't know what she would do if she was to lose HER mom, how she is really good at doing makeup, how she has a really close best friend already and I don't, how she can easily make other friends and conversate with people when I'm too shy and get social anxiety which prevents me from doing so, how she has a boyfriend, how she had friends her freshman year in college when I barely had 2 acquaintances, how she mentioned that she upgraded to an iPhone 7+ when my family is going through financial difficulties from my mother's passing and still trying to pay for my college charges, how she has settled in college and loves it there when I'm busy transferring and fear that I still will not enjoy it at my new college next week, how she recently got 4K retweets on something she mentioned about how she can't relate to hating on her friends, and how she judges me and others who do not share her religious beliefs. I try not to compare myself to her or other people, but it is really difficult. The idea of giving up social media did not work for me since I use it to communicate with other people as well, not just her. Just wanted to put this out there haha. Thanks for reading if you made it this far!

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You just need to let this friendship go. You two grew in different directions.

 

You are in college. Make new friends.

 

I am sorry about your mom. I lost my mom about 6 years ago as an adult. It was still very difficult. Has to be worse because you are so young. Don't be afraid to reach out or join a support group if you find yourself needing help

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I am sorry about your Mother. Have you nobody at college to go to?

 

Forget the friend. Move on.

 

Nobody can stop you feeling anxious but you. So you just change moods for thirty seconds, one and two minutes a day, and increase that to three, five... All in your own time, make it a hobby, train your brain.

Edited by darkmoon
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