letting go

[makeithappen]

After no longer putting up with my 'friend'' s lack of care, I've finally removed her from my contact list. It's painful, but i need friends who are emotionally available. I want friends who contact me and enquire about me.

How can I stop feeling do sad, although it had to be done ?

[StalwartMind]

A combination of letting time pass, as well as accepting that you made the right choice. How difficult it is varies greatly from person to person, but if you need something from someone and you aren't getting it, then you are just prolonging misery. To me it's important that anyone who is my friend feels like they get something out of my company, otherwise they should consider finding someone who can provide whatever it is they seek.

 

I think it's important to understand that not everyone on this planet, is meant to be a part of our life, but i can still be difficult to let go, since you did at one point see something in each other that made you become friends in the first place. This is alright too, people can change with time, or you just grow apart for whichever reason, someone out there will be able to give you the emotional caring you crave, and this doesn't make you a bad person for having to let go of someone. I would encourage anyone to hold on to whichever they find valuable to their life and let go of that which they do not feel is sufficient. This may be perceived in a negative way, but life is too short to not surround yourself with people who make you happy.

[candie13]

in friendship just like in our love life, we need people who reciprocate. think that you have stopped wasting your time and investing in a RS that was not bringing you any decent return on investment.

 

in addition to that, you get your free time back and stay open to meeting new exciting people who at least at the beginning won't let you down.

 

Most likely you're a giver so you might want to start reinforcing your boundaries with the new friends - as well as giving them some space.

 

cutting out people who won't give back is healthy. Get reassurance in the fact that it's hard, but on the long term, you're going to be much happier.

[preraph]

It's a start. To get quality friends, you have to filter out the ones who aren't giving you what you need. You have to maintain standards and expect more. Even then, I sympathize, because friendships do go up and down in their natural course. But you can't just show that you'll settle for something one-sided.

 

What you need to do is take up a new interest or rekindle an old one and go make yourself busy doing something fun and interesting. That will give you something good to talk to your remaining friends about so you don't sound boring. So go live a good life and before long, if you're really doing fun things, people will eventually want to join you.